The Quebecers' theme music is sung by the wrestlers themselves. I must admit, it's no "All-American Boys." The match nearly ends mere seconds after the bell when Rick tries to clothesline Jacques over the tope rope. Fortunately, the Mountie can't make it over, so he falls forward and rolls under the ropes. The Steiners dominate the Quebecers in the early going before Pierre hits a clothesline from the second rope (which is legal). The Steiners shift the momentum back in their favor, leading Rick to attempt an illegal piledriver (a move I've never seen him do) before Scott waves it off.
When Raw returns from break, Rick Steiner hits a succession of Maneuvers, jumping over Pierre's shoulder for a Nice Maneuver (#1) and then letting Pierre's momentum run him through the ropes to the outside with a Clever Maneuver (#2). Later, Scott takes down the nearly-three hundred pound Quebecer with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Johnny Polo shows up at ringside with a hockey stick, distracting Rick, who attempts a very strange move off the second rope wherein he seems to deliberately land stomach-first on Pierre's knee. Pierre then tries to superplex Rick, who counters with a front suplex off the second rope, an Unbelievable Maneuver (#3). He then tries to pin his opponent before Jacques tries to break up the cover. Rick moves out of the way, leaving Jacques to elbow his own partner. The Quebecers form a huddle with their new manager on the outside.
Snuffleupagus hates the Quebecers. |
A new Raw girl is in the ring as Mr. Perfect, who at Summerslam lost by countout to Shawn Michaels, enters. His opponent is Tony DeVito, who steps out of the ring early on to gloat after getting in a few punches. Perfect chases after DeVito, who tries to flee to the back, but Perfect hauls him back into the ring. A "Perfect sucks" chant breaks out, joined by Vladimir the Superfan. I'm surprised at you, Vlad. Vince celebrates the recent Israeli-Palestinian peace accord. Keep in mind that this is the same man who knew for sure that Lex Luger would win the WWF title at Summerslam. A "We Want Shawn" chant breaks out among the same fans who were booing Mr. Perfect. Hennig wins with the Perfectplex.
Vladimir wants Shawn. |
Rick seems naked here. Not as naked as Tatanka, but figuratively naked. |
Want to know what Tatanka is doing on this night? Here are two hints:
Mang, the chicas... they're for fun. |
Who could it be? |
Next, we see a commercial featuring an unattractive, fattish man and his hot wife (a la Married with Children, The Simpsons, Family Guy, The King of Queens, etc.). They are in bed, and she tells him it's only nine o'clock. The man decides it's time to get raw. No, not that raw. Monday Night Raw. His wife is disappointed.
The Mountie always gets his man. |
Glutes. |
Doink comes back down to ringside after the break and finds another bucket under the ring. He keeps the remaining two announcers at bay with the bucket, but then empties the confetti into the audience, slipping a little on a ringside puddle. After a Gorilla Monsoon voice-over promo for the new WWF King of the Ring game from Acclaim (which sucks), we return with a rundown of next week's card, featuring Bam Bam, Mr. Perfect, and IRS, all of whom will be "in action," along with an interview with Bret Hart. Pierre vs. Scott Steiner will also happen tomorrow with a tag team title match on the line.
Be Bret Hart! If Bret could only do punches and kicks! |
Love your write-ups, but you lost me a bit with your mention of "Married with Children". Al Bundy was never supposed to be "unattractive" and certainly not "fattish", and Peg was definitely not supposed to be "hot".
ReplyDeleteMaybe I was thinking of this:
Deletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUWVU2rM_B4
"Peg was definitely not supposed to be 'hot'."
DeleteYou, sir, are crazy.