tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31829964199019246912024-02-19T17:16:59.898-05:00How Much Does This Guy Weigh?The wrestling blog of Youtube's Art0Donnell. Videos, Photoshops, reviews, <br> commentary, botches, nostalgia, you name it! Except wrestlers' weights. I don't know those.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger291125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-4909351278308109262022-07-24T22:46:00.001-04:002022-07-24T22:46:37.698-04:00Art's Raw reviews return!<p>On Sunday, August 7th, my first Raw review in six years comes to WrestleCrap. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIvfeYZIiaCK0cxtgRPatkB59pxXNjy_tYcNHdsolBpA6kv5sDPVUXDWN0D3MEqng_HS8znyLxAKeMN2IjLQjJxPGH7wsyH-UJDwLr-Ki__hLH7DNV8qmsz5OSoLMczXxh5wV7N0eWsLcizuRyLouPxyhb2pzI7NbSqccKxIqa6hPY_SIa1_pCpUty/s648/Art%20is%20War%20logo.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="584" data-original-width="648" height="288" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIvfeYZIiaCK0cxtgRPatkB59pxXNjy_tYcNHdsolBpA6kv5sDPVUXDWN0D3MEqng_HS8znyLxAKeMN2IjLQjJxPGH7wsyH-UJDwLr-Ki__hLH7DNV8qmsz5OSoLMczXxh5wV7N0eWsLcizuRyLouPxyhb2pzI7NbSqccKxIqa6hPY_SIa1_pCpUty/s320/Art%20is%20War%20logo.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p>Check <a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/" target="_blank">WrestleCrap</a> every other Sunday for a new review. And of course, I will continue to post a new induction every other Thursday.</p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-19420715720153390782017-07-30T15:26:00.003-04:002022-07-24T23:02:35.031-04:00Every Wrestlecrap Induction by Art0Donnell (so far)<div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/librarians/" target="_blank">The Librarians</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/willie-whopper/" target="_blank">Willie Whopper in <i>Rasslin' Round</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/casino-battle-royale/" target="_blank">The First Casino Battle Royale</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wrestling-its-a-laugh/" target="_blank"><i>Wrestling: It's a Laugh!</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wwe-colonel-sanders/" target="_blank">WWE's Colonel Sanders</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mccinseys-island/" target="_blank">Hulk Hogan in <i>McCinsey's Island</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/viking-raiders-vs-street-profits/" target="_blank">Viking Raiders vs. Street Profits</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/100-lucha/" target="_blank">100% Lucha, la película</a></div><div><br /></div><span><a name='more'></a></span><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/shawn-michaels-baywatch/" target="_blank">Shawn Michaels on <i>Baywatch</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/jax-flair/" target="_blank">Nia Jax vs. Charlotte Flair</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/zombies-and-egg/" target="_blank">The WWE Movie Tie-In: Zombie lumberjacks and a stolen egg</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mankind-vs-santa/" target="_blank">The Mankind-Santa Boiler Room Brawl</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/scotty-goldman/" target="_blank">Scotty Goldman</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/countdown/" target="_blank">Dolph Ziggler in <i>Countdown</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/rowans-cage/" target="_blank">Rowan's Cage</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/x-files/" target="_blank"><i>The X-Files</i> Wrestling Episode</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/escape-the-undertaker/" target="_blank">Escape The Undertaker</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/kung-fu-naki/" target="_blank">Kung Fu Naki</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/sin-cara/" target="_blank">Sin Cara</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/step-by-step-my-two-dads/" target="_blank">The <i>Step By Step</i> and <i>My Two Dads</i> Wrestling Episodes</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/natalya-riott-squad/" target="_blank">Natalya vs. The Riott Squad</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/hulk-hogan-books/" target="_blank">Hulk Hogan's Autobiographies</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/money-in-the-bank-2020/" target="_blank">Money In The Bank 2020</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/an-xpw-two-pack/" target="_blank">An XPW Two-Pack</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/lesnar-vs-orton/" target="_blank">Lesnar vs. Orton</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bret-hart-immortal/" target="_blank">Bret Hart on <i>The Immortal</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/rambo-y-sus-titanes/" target="_blank">Rambo y sus titanes</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bionic-woman/" target="_blank"><i>The Bionic Woman</i> Wrestling Episode</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/21st-anniversary/" target="_blank">WrestleCrap's 21st Anniversary Special</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/swamp-fight/" target="_blank">The Swamp Fight</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/gary-garbutt/" target="_blank">Gary Garbutt, the Masked Janitor</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/smackdown-karaoke-showdown/" target="_blank">The <i>Smackdown</i> Karaoke Showdown</a></div><div><br /></div><div>2020 Gooker Award Winner: <a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/gookerwin/retribution-gooker-2020/" target="_blank">Retribution</a></div><div><br /></div><div><i><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/help-im-trapped/" target="_blank">Help! I'm Trapped in a Professional Wrestler's Body</a></i></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kenny-vs-spenny/" target="_blank"><i>Kenny vs. Spenny</i> Does Pro Wrestling</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/backlund-for-president/" target="_blank">Backlund For President</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-mullets/" target="_blank"><i>The Mullets</i> "Smackdown"</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/are-you-being-served/" target="_blank">The <i>Are You Being Served?</i> Wrestling Episode</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wwe-originals/" target="_blank"><i>WWE Originals </i>CD</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/farewell-the-revival/" target="_blank">The Last Days of The Revival</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/new-york-rules-wcw-thunder/" target="_blank">The "New York Rules" <i>Thunder</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/all-wheels-wrestling/" target="_blank">All Wheels Wrestling</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/alias-the-champ/" target="_blank"><i>Alias The Champ</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/big-apple-takedown/" target="_blank"><i>Big Apple Takedown</i></a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/armed-and-famous/" target="_blank"><i>Armed & Famous </i>with Trish Stratus</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/roman-reigns-attacker/" target="_blank">The Roman Reigns Attacker</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/uwf-beach-brawl/" target="_blank">UWF Beach Brawl</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/icopro/" target="_blank">ICOPRO</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mike-kanellis/" target="_blank">Mike Kanellis</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/beach-blast-bikini/" target="_blank">Beach Blast Bikini Contest</a></div><div><br /></div><div><i><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/journey-into-darkness/" target="_blank">Journey Into Darkness</a></i></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/drake-pees/" target="_blank">Drake Maverick's Urine Trouble</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/sgt-slaughter-monster-truck/" target="_blank"><i>Blood, Sweat & Gears</i> with Sgt. Slaughter</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/undertaker-vs-goldberg/" target="_blank">Undertaker vs. Goldberg</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/lavar-ball/" target="_blank">LaVar Ball on MizTV</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mdyga/" target="_blank">Make Darren Young Great Again</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/trooper-mario/" target="_blank">The Storm Trooper / Super Mario</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/titus-thanksgiving/" target="_blank">Thanksgiving with Titus O'Neil</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/superman/" target="_blank">Superman in "No Holds Barred"</a><br /></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/uwf-blackjack-brawl/" target="_blank">UWF Blackjack Brawl</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hakushi-americanized/" target="_blank">Hakushi Gets Americanized</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/karate-wrestling/" target="_blank">Phil Silva's Karate Wrestling</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bonaduce/" target="_blank">Danny Bonaduce vs. Eric Young</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/self-help-ddp/" target="_blank">Self-Help DDP</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/gestapo-match/" target="_blank">The GLOW Gestapo Match</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wxo/" target="_blank">WXO</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/uncensored-95/" target="_blank">Uncensored '95</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tag-team-universe/" target="_blank">Headbangers, Tag Team Champions of The Universe</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bayley-this-is-your-life/" target="_blank">Bayley, This Is Your Life</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/pg-13/" target="_blank">PG-13 Come To Raw</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bingo-break/" target="_blank">Bingo Break</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/slam-master-j/" target="_blank">Slam Master J</a></div><div><br /></div><div>Patreon Exclusive Re-Induction: <a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/irs-redux/" target="_blank">IRS</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kurt-angle-action-short/" target="_blank">The Kurt Angle Action Short</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/miss-wrestlemania/" target="_blank">The Miss WrestleMania Battle Royal</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/battle-of-the-breakfast-cereal/" target="_blank">Battle of the Breakfast Cereal</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/goldberg-nash-love-boat/" target="_blank">Goldberg and Kevin Nash on The Love Boat</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/giant-gonzalez-baywatch/" target="_blank">Giant Gonzalez on Baywatch</a></div><div><br /></div><div>2018 Gooker Award Winner: <a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/gooker-2018/" target="_blank">Crown Jewel</a></div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/battlebowl-1993/" target="_blank">Battlebowl 1993</a></div><div><br /></div><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/raw-sewage-match/" target="_blank">The XPW Raw Sewage Match </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Patreon-Exclusive Re-Induction: <a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bastion-booger-redux/" target="_blank">Bastion Booger</a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hogan-warrior-ii/" target="_blank">Hogan-Warrior II </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/awa-team-challenge-pilot/" target="_blank">The Lost AWA Team Challenge Pilot </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bikers-court/" target="_blank">Biker's Court with Jim Duggan </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kowabunga/" target="_blank">Kowabunga </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/pgw/" target="_blank">Professional Gay Wrestling </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/undercoversteph/" target="_blank">Stephanie McMahon on Undercover Boss</a></span><br /><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Patreon Exclusive Re-Induction: <a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/droese-redux/" target="_blank">Duke The Dumpster Droese</a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Re-Induction: <a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/aldo-redux/" target="_blank">The Portuguese Man-O-War, Aldo Montoya</a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/dx-invasion/" target="_blank">The Complete DX Invasion </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/eric-bischoff-hardcore/" target="_blank">Eric Bischoff, Hardcore Champion </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bischoff-shane/" target="_blank">Eric Bischoff vs. Shane McMahon </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/punjabi-playboy/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Great Khali, Punjabi Playboy</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/badguys/" target="_blank">Bad Guys</a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-glow-pilot-chat-with-hot-singles-and-tag-teams-in-your-area/" target="_blank">The GLOW Pilot </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/poop-in-the-pool/" target="_blank">Poop in the Pool </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/nes-kotr/" target="_blank">King of the Ring for NES</a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kiss-me-arse/" target="_blank">The Kiss-Me-Arse Match</a> </span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wbf1992/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The 1992 WBF Championship</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wrestlemania-iv/" target="_blank">Wrestlemania IV </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/honey-i-shrunk-the-kids/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Bret & Owen on Honey, I Shrunk the Kids</span></a><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mamas-family/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Mama's Family Wrestling Episode</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mr-rocko/" target="_blank">Mr. Rocko </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/raw-tenth-anniversary/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Raw Tenth Anniversary</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">2017 Gooker Award Winner: <a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/jinder-mahal-gooker-2017/" target="_blank">Jinder Mahal, WWE Champion </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/santas-little-helper/" target="_blank">Santa's Little Helper </a></span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tough-enough-2015/" target="_blank">Tough Enough 2015 </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/stephanie-pukes/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Stephanie vs. Vickie</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Patreon Exclusive Anti-induction: <a href="https://www.patreon.com/wrestlecrap" target="_blank">Diesel vs. Bret Hart, Survivor Series 1995 </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/triple-h-kozlov/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Triple H vs. Kozlov</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/trick-or-street-fight/" target="_blank">Trick or Street Fight </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/greater-power/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Greater Power</span></a><br />
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<a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/terri-runnels-pregnancy/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Terri Runnels Pregnancy</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://wrestlecrap.com/inductions/toxic-turtles/" target="_blank">The Toxic Turtles </a></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/dustin-runnels/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Dustin Runnels</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/triple-h-on-pacific-blue/" target="_blank">Triple H on Pacific Blue</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/heydude/" target="_blank">Captain Lou on Hey Dude</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/all-the-marbles" target="_blank">All The Marbles</a></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/glow-ppv" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The GLOW Pay-Per-View</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/battledome" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Battle Dome Invades WCW</span></a><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-chrisley-knows-best-wrestling-episode" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Chrisley Knows Best Wrestling Episode</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bootsthecat" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Murder of Boots the Cat</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/legendary" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Legendary</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/fuller-house" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Fuller House Wrestling Episode</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-super-slam-90" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Super Slam '90</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/worst-hhh-entrances" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Worst of Triple H Wrestlemania Entrances</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bret-the-racist-hart" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Bret "The Racist" Hart?</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wwa-revolution" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">WWA Revolution</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/cooking-for-the-single-man" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Cooking for the Single Man</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/john-cena-gets-stabbed" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">John Cena Gets Stabbed</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-mexamerica" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">MexAmerica</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/santas-little-helper" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Santa's Little Helper</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/goldberg-script" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Goldberg Refuses to Follow the Script</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/stephanies-thanksgiving-pms" target="_blank">Stephanie's Thanksgiving PMS</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/swing-your-lady" target="_blank">Swing Your Lady</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hollywood-medium" target="_blank">The WWE Divas Meet the Hollywood Medium</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tiger-ali-singh" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Tiger Ali Singh</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/great-white-north" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">In Your House: Great White North</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/sting-in-wwe" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Sting in WWE</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-wwf-sumo-match" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The WWF Sumo Match</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/sable-unleashed" target="_blank">Sable Unleashed</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/nxt-kids" target="_blank">NXT Kids</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wwf-in-san-juan" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">WWF in San Juan</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/racket-girls" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Racket Girls</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/teddy-long-kristal-marshall-wedding" target="_blank">The Teddy Long-Kristal Marshall Wedding</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wcws-asylum-match" target="_blank">WCW's Asylum Match</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/pierre-the-hardcore-reindeer" target="_blank">Pierre, the Hardcore Reindeer</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/john-cena-vs-michael-cole" target="_blank">John Cena vs. Michael Cole</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/barbara-bb-bush" target="_blank">Barbara "BB" Bush</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mongo-referee" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Mongo McMichael, Referee</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">April Fools' Induction: <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/sufferin-suck-otash" target="_blank">Roman Reign's First Year as Champion</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wrestlemania-31-intercontinental-title-hunt" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Wrestlemania 31 Intercontinental Title Hunt</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/booker-t-vs-edge-samurai-shampoo" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Booker T vs. Edge</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/piper-bagwell-boxing-match" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Piper-Bagwell Boxing Match</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Gooker Award Winner: <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/rusev-lana-dolph-summer-love-trapezoid-the-2015-gooker-award-winner" target="_blank">The Lana-Rusev-Dolph-Summer Love Trapezoid</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/1995royalrumble" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The 1995 Royal Rumble</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/1994-slammy-awards" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The 1994 Slammy Awards</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kevin-federline-vs-john-cena" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Kevin Federline vs. John Cena</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/survivor-series-substitutes" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Survivor Series Substitutes</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/alvin-the-chipmunks" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Alvin & The Chipmunks Wrestling Episode</span></a><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/buckle-up-teddy" target="_blank"><br />
</a> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/ortons-vs-undertaker" target="_blank">The Ortons vs. The Undertaker</a></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/buckle-up-teddy" target="_blank"><br />
</a> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/buckle-up-teddy" target="_blank">"Buckle Up, Teddy!"</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/jbl-is-poopy" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">JBL is Poopy</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/million-dollar-mania" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">McMahon's Million-Dollar Mania</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/debut-of-becky-lynch" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Debuts of Becky Lynch</span> and Yoshi Tatsu</a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-kane-rey-and-the-burlap-bag-a-demon-in-the-sack" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Kane, Rey, and the Burlap Bag</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hulk-hogan-on-arsenio" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Hulk Hogan on Arsenio</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/macho-poop" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Macho Man's Poop Problems</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-outsiders-vs-porn-stars" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Outsiders vs. Adult Film Stars</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tough-enough-2011" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Tough Enough 2011</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/shotgun" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Shotgun Saturday Night from NYC</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/russell-madness" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Russell Madness</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bark-like-a-dog" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Trish Barks Like a Dog</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/robin-hood-nitro" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The "Robin Hood" Nitro</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-kiss-my-arse-match-at-least-it-wasnt-a-bra-and-knickers-match" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Kiss-My-Arse Match</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/nation-of-domination-uswa-version" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">USWA's Nation of Domination</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/booker-t-vs-triple-h" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Booker T vs. Triple H</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/america-the-beautiful" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">The Worst of "America The Beautiful" at Wrestlemania</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Gooker Award Winner: <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/bella-vs-bella" target="_blank">Bella vs. Bella</a></span><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/2012-royal-rumble" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">2012 Royal Rumble</span></a><br />
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</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-big-show-vs-the-authority" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Big Show vs. The Authority</span></a><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-1997-slammy-awards" target="_blank">1997 Slammy Awards</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/karate-fighters/" target="_blank">Karate Fighters Holiday Tournament</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/active-inductions/end-game/" target="_blank">End Game starring Kurt Angle</a></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/jailbird-crush/" target="_blank">Jailbird Crush</a></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/vito-in-a-dress/" target="_blank">Vito in a Dress</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/roberts-lawler/" target="_blank">Jake Roberts vs. Jerry Lawler</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/john-cena-this-is-your-life/" target="_blank">John Cena: This is Your Life</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/justjoe/">Just Joe </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/triple-h-destroys-the-minitron/">Triple H destroys the minitron</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-wwe-walkout/">WWE Walkout </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/austinpees/">Stone Cold's last Raw of 2002</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/austinhugs/">Austin hugs Vince </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/chynaboxing/">Chyna vs. Joey Buttafuoco</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/chyna-sabrina/">Chyna on Sabrina The Teenage Witch</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/pinata-on-a-pole/">Piñata on a Pole Match </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/under-the-mat/">Under the Mat by Diana Smith</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-hunter-hearst-helmsley-bow-down-to-the-king-or-just-curtsy/">Hunter Hearst Helmsley </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-kane-vs-edge-fool-me-once-shame-on-you-fool-me-twenty-times-shame-on-me/">Kane vs. Edge</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-cena-vs-laurinaitis-ace-drops-a-deuce/">Cena vs. Laurinaitis </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-shawn-michaels-in-playgirl-the-one-time-we-were-glad-hbk-refused-to-drop-the-belt/">Shawn Michaels in Playgirl</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/badd-vs-flamingo/">Johnny B Badd vs. Scotty Flamingo </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-rock-on-star-trek/">The Rock on Star Trek Voyager </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-zack-ryder-vs-kane-friday-the-13th-part-z/">Zack Ryder vs. Kane </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-inside-out-triple-h-gets-into-a-pickle/">Inside Out starring Triple H</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/nwo-souled-out-1997/">nWo Souled Out </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/barry-didinsky/">Barry Didinsky </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kevin-nash-hair/">Kevin Nash vs. Chris Jericho, hair vs. hair</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/lexsellsout/">Lex Luger sells out? </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-wrestlemania-xv-russomania/">Wrestlemania XV </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-ahmed-johnsons-trunks-tony-norris-gets-a-bum-wrap/">Ahmed Johnson's trunks </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/guest-induction-shawn-michaels-vs-kurt-angle/">April Fools: Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/18-seconds/">Sheamus vs. Daniel Bryan</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-steve-austin-vs-yokozuna-a-match-fit-for-a-king-apparently/">Steve Austin vs. Yokozuna</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/cryme-tyme-meets-george-w-bush/">Cryme Tyme meets George W. Bush</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hollywood-backlot-brawl/">Hollywood Backlot Brawl </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/virgil/">The return of Virgil</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wrestlingclassic/">The Wrestling Classic </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/viscera/">The World's Largest Love Machine, Viscera</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/doubledare/">Double Dare's Super Slop-o-mania </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/punkd/">WWE wrestlers on Punk'd</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mad-bull/">Mad Bull </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/1999-royal-rumble/">Royal Rumble 1999</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/aj-and-dolph-are-poopy/">AJ and Dolph's New Year's Toast</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/adr-vs-santa/">Alberto Del Río runs over Santa Claus</a> </span><br />
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<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/1996-slammy-awards/">1996 Slammy Awards</a> </span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"></span><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/no-limit-soldiers/">Master P and the No Limit Soldiers</a></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-hla-match/">The HLA match</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/billy-and-chuck/">Billy and Chuck's Wedding </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hla/">HLA </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-haunting-of-roddy-piper/">The Haunting of Roddy Piper </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-executioner-the-effluence-of-execution/">The Executioner</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/johnny-curtis-nxt-winner-tests-your-gag-reflex/">Johnny Curtis's sight gags</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-indecent-proposal-match-the-only-wrestling-angle-to-win-a-film-award-in-vegas/">The Indecent Proposal Match</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/super-posedown/">The Super Posedown</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/apa-bar-room-invitational/">APA Barroom Invitational</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/vince-mcmahon-wwf-champion/"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span></a> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/vince-mcmahon-wwf-champion/">Vince McMahon, WWF Champion</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-sting-vs-dogs/">Sting vs. Rick Steiner</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/mark-henry-sex-addict/">Mark Henry, sex addict</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/rodman-down-under/"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif">Rodman Down Under</span></a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/piper-vs-lawler/">Piper vs. Lawler </a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/nxt-season-2-finale/">NXT Season 2 finale</a> </span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/farting-natalya/">Farting Natalya </a></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wwa-inception/" target="_blank">WWA: The Inception</a> </span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-self-destruction-of-the-ultimate-warrior/" target="_blank"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span></a> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-self-destruction-of-the-ultimate-warrior/" target="_blank">The Self-Destruction of the Ultimate Warrior</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/flair-piper-celebrity-wife-swap/" target="_blank">Flair and Piper on Celebrity Wife Swap</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tough-enough-2/" target="_blank">Tough Enough 2</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/raw-is-aldrin/" target="_blank">Raw is Aldrin</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tna-on-family-feud/" target="_blank">TNA on Family Feud</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/million-dollar-tough-enough-the-male-diva-search/" target="_blank">Million Dollar Tough Enough</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wcws-kiss-my-ass-match-what-better-match-for-two-old-farts/" target="_blank">WCW's Kiss My Ass Match</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/raw-is-piven-monday-night-becomes-damaged-goods/" target="_blank">Raw is Piven</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/donald-trump-buys-raw-dropped-almost-as-fast-as-wwes-stock/" target="_blank">Donald Trump buys Raw</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/kurt-angle-sex-offender-his-4th-i-was-intercourse/" target="_blank">Kurt Angle, Sex Offender</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-great-fall-of-angle-how-did-he-avoid-a-broken-freakin-everything/" target="_blank">The Great Fall of Angle</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/lita-cheats-on-matt-hardy-starring-glen-jacobs-as-matt/" target="_blank">Lita Cheats on Matt Hardy</a></span><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/gene-snitsky-accidental-abortionist-a-miscarriage-of-justice/" target="_blank">Gene Snitsky, Accidental Abortionist</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-saga-of-matt-hardy-and-lita-and-kane-you-people-found-this-less-awful-than-the-diva-search/" target="_blank">The Saga of Matt Hardy and Lita and Kane</a></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/wrestlemania-xi-the-grandest-stage-of-the-mall/" target="_blank">Wrestlemania XI</a></span><br />
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</a></span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-wrestlemania-x-ladder-match-hardware-heaven-94/" target="_blank">April Fools: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/frank-trigg-vs-aj-styles-you-cant-spell-summarily-awful-without-mma/" target="_blank">Frank Trigg vs. AJ Styles</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_519322236"><br />
</a></span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/tna-reverse-battle-royal-three-stages-of-hell/" target="_blank">TNA Reverse Battle Royal</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/crush-vs-undertaker-bollywood-backlot-brawl/" target="_blank">"Undertaker" vs. Crush</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/governor/">The Governor</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_519322211"><br />
</a></span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-alex-the-pug-porteau-hugs-are-better-than-pugs/" target="_blank">Alex "The Pug" Porteau</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-avatar-avatarded-yes-we-know-thats-not-pc-but-it-is-accurate-so-yeah-avatarded/" target="_blank">Avatar</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-wrestling-on-morton-downey-jr-sex-lies-and-headlocks-but-mostly-lies/" target="_blank">Pro Wrestling on the Morton Downey, Jr. Show</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_519322182"><br />
</a></span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/hardcore-justice-the-one-night-stand-wed-all-regret-the-next-morning/" target="_blank">HardCORE Justice 2010</a></span></span><br />
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</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/induction-the-kiss-my-ass-match-this-stipulation-needed-an-assterisk/" target="_blank">The Rock vs. Billy Gunn: Kiss My Ass Match</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><br />
</span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/a-johnny-damon-christmas-yankee-go-home/" target="_blank">A Johnny Damon Christmas</a></span></span><br />
<span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.blogger.com/goog_519322167"><br />
</a></span> <span face=""trebuchet ms" , sans-serif"><a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/roxxi-laveaux-tnas-witchy-woman/" target="_blank">Roxxi Laveaux</a><br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/the-awf-bringing-real-wrestling-back-four-minutes-at-a-time/" target="_blank">The AWF</a></span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-20656075542212131152017-02-06T19:47:00.002-05:002017-02-06T19:47:52.905-05:00@Art0Donnell joins Twitter! Plus, Football meets Wrestling<div style="text-align: center;">
Follow <a href="https://twitter.com/Art0Donnell" target="_blank">@Art0Donnell</a> on Twitter, and read my <a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-times-american-football-crossed-over-into-wrestling" target="_blank">latest article on WhatCulture.</a></div>
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<a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-times-american-football-crossed-over-into-wrestling" target="_blank"><br /></a>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzC_FL0kUpJaMfVbAg_u4qqQvNtbyLCQvdn4q7OTiffVW73F1acKgfEL5IRqpKuQ00chqkdu4nmn7LCUeCFq_TqjZQGeAeyciuoJYlNQjB7ZmtKuCBwlCGDbQNxIasmteRaU6h7Dds1vk/s1600/stabbed96.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a><a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-times-american-football-crossed-over-into-wrestling" target="_blank"><img alt="http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-times-american-football-crossed-over-into-wrestling" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzC_FL0kUpJaMfVbAg_u4qqQvNtbyLCQvdn4q7OTiffVW73F1acKgfEL5IRqpKuQ00chqkdu4nmn7LCUeCFq_TqjZQGeAeyciuoJYlNQjB7ZmtKuCBwlCGDbQNxIasmteRaU6h7Dds1vk/s1600/stabbed96.png" /></a></div>
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<span id="goog_618267210"></span><span id="goog_618267211"></span><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-69896750484060108052017-01-17T19:25:00.000-05:002017-01-17T19:25:05.253-05:00Ten Misconceptions about Hulk Hogan You Probably Believe<div style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/10-misconceptions-about-hulk-hogan-you-probably-believe">Ten Misconceptions about Hulk Hogan You Probably Believe </a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/10-misconceptions-about-hulk-hogan-you-probably-believe"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghdL9OboMN8JnkTA52qu7psm0x1r5QS_ZpQV81CqWXL5QhAeOB-Xc_7QCYcxtO2TJfq4Ka2ic8TgMbR4MZg5qMQ-KKW5htPY072dAl0TUbT-2QGxCsco1obwcMVADODYp0tu89rksRUm4/s1600/Screen+Shot+2017-01-17+at+7.21.58+PM.png" /></a></div>
<a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/10-misconceptions-about-hulk-hogan-you-probably-believe"><br /></a>
<br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-218174947480606152017-01-04T21:27:00.001-05:002017-01-04T21:27:23.330-05:00Art0Donnell debuts on WhatCulture!<div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-wrestlers-whose-ring-names-outlasted-their-gimmicks" target="">12 Wrestlers Whose Ring Names Outlasted their Gimmicks</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIAeokPtyftUsOq_AOcWOKMo-MvBFzRl76UTOSWgmaInLHjw8PJ9cQz-ZjsgsZ0krAqTj6o5yWmXucyLXPNHwH7o-ZLXpm4E6Vr6oykGDLm2Q_f2Qzwa5BQFRTwBqy9xVRRhyU2ol6F_Y/s1600/the+sandman+surfer.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="249" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIAeokPtyftUsOq_AOcWOKMo-MvBFzRl76UTOSWgmaInLHjw8PJ9cQz-ZjsgsZ0krAqTj6o5yWmXucyLXPNHwH7o-ZLXpm4E6Vr6oykGDLm2Q_f2Qzwa5BQFRTwBqy9xVRRhyU2ol6F_Y/s320/the+sandman+surfer.png" width="320" /></a></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-wrestlers-whose-ring-names-outlasted-their-gimmicks"><br />http://whatculture.com/wwe/12-wrestlers-whose-ring-names-outlasted-their-gimmicks</a></span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-43423117245925933782016-09-30T18:04:00.001-04:002016-09-30T18:04:53.974-04:00Raw #204 - April 7th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Mankind’s flash-paper fireball attack on the Undertaker from last week is this week’s cold opening, complete with dramatic music and slow motion. Tonight, Vince says that Shawn Michaels is going to “get a load off his chest.” Whose load it is remains unclear. Owen Hart and the British Bulldog come to the ring with their respective flags to wrestle a non-title tag team match. Owen Hart grabs the mic and praises his brother Bret for filling his family with love, then calls the audience, “haters”, years before the word would be run into the ground by social media.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLslz6_q5mOJ8BdIN7BDsv7wwYI09YMPBpdLY3qTg554sbF72ugLPzEmvgsI5a6Bks4ZOdEkOFaCl-xk10k6GC8FFSSeerlGT443JNQTTcm_pOh0nrO3JNFDhSje_iAq5WekONpt2S9UM/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-01-09+at+10.39.04+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="151" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLslz6_q5mOJ8BdIN7BDsv7wwYI09YMPBpdLY3qTg554sbF72ugLPzEmvgsI5a6Bks4ZOdEkOFaCl-xk10k6GC8FFSSeerlGT443JNQTTcm_pOh0nrO3JNFDhSje_iAq5WekONpt2S9UM/s200/Screen+Shot+2016-01-09+at+10.39.04+PM.png" width="200" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaybmIzXNjTe-qVqg0jg21OuOFJCesIzrI7J7E2mPyYU1q7ZndxC7PkL681ysZvTM4zfz6h3d1BFJ8DYpeyzYgqNnNcGORJVl8ZLStVdOLDA8RZUZIGUDhP8fYcqSUI1w5KWB4El3jK6o/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-01-09+at+10.48.02+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaybmIzXNjTe-qVqg0jg21OuOFJCesIzrI7J7E2mPyYU1q7ZndxC7PkL681ysZvTM4zfz6h3d1BFJ8DYpeyzYgqNnNcGORJVl8ZLStVdOLDA8RZUZIGUDhP8fYcqSUI1w5KWB4El3jK6o/s200/Screen+Shot+2016-01-09+at+10.48.02+PM.png" width="200" /></a></div>
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</span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The opponents are the Godwinns, who lead a “USA” chant. Hey, remember when the Headbangers won a title shot at Wrestlemania and got screwed by a DQ victory? No one else does…. Henry drops cousin Phineas butt-first onto Owen’s in what Vince would probably call “a double-team effort.” The “brother-in-laws” back Phineas into their corner, but the big hog farmer goes nuts with punches and kicks, culminating in a mule kick to the air in the middle of the ring before Henry can calm him down. Owen later hits Phineas with an enzuigiri kick, but Vince immediately urges us to “forget about it(!)”, so just ignore this sentence. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">After the commercial break, Owen and Davey Boy are double-teaming Phineas, who knocks both men down with a double clothesline and makes the hot tag to Henry. HOG hits the Slop Drop on Davey Boy, but Owen breaks up the pin and covers Godwinn while the referee is distracted. Also distracted is the announce team (which includes Honky Tonk Man for some reason), who are so busy with an LOD inset promo that they overlook the finish of the match. To be fair, it was quite the promo from Hawk, who promised to knock the bile out of the champions’ bladder. What he lacks in anatomical knowledge, he makes up for in delivery. The Road Warriors then cut off the tag team champions from returning to the locker room, trapping them between themselves and the Godwinns, who are armed with slop. Unfortunately, Davey Boy and Owen duck, leaving the LOD to take the slopping. Now it’s Animal and Hawk who look like they want to get a load off their chests. Vince sells this like it’s one of histories greatest tragedies (Oh. Oh no. Oh no!). The Road Warriors proceed to brawl with the Godwinns as fans chant “LOD!”</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Honky has left the announce table by the time Raw returns from break, and in his place is a teenage boy with a shirt requesting that Sesame Street’s Elmo manually stimulate his genitals. Hey, let’s save this year’s quota of homo-erotic taunts for D-Generation X, thank you very much. Backstage, Owen and Davey Boy watch replays of the LOD’s slopping. Stone Cold Steve Austin wrestles for the first time since Wrestlemania, and his opponent is the future “Mr. Ass,” Billy Gunn, who is accompanied by The Honky Tonk Man. Honky, in turn, is carrying the fragments of his broken guitar from last week. Steve Austin spends the first minute of the match kicking Billy Gunn’s ass (to use a technical term) until Gunn exits the ring for a breather In the meantime, Bulldog and Owen cut a split-screen promo in front of a monitor that shows a split-screen of Austin and themselves, which shows another split-screen, and so on. JR promotes “Sunday Night Heat” on the USA Network. No, not that Sunday Night Heat; I mean the Sunday Night lineup of Pacific Blue, Silk Stalkings, and The Big Easy, which pre-dates the WWF B-show by about a year. Austin flips off both Billy Gunn and the referee, Billy flips off Steve Austin and says the F-word, and Austin gives Billy the Stunner for the victory to get Gunn and Honky’s partnership off to a very inauspicious start. HTM grabs the microphone to give Gunn a pep talk and sales pitch. Billy rejects the offer with a punch to Honky’s face. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Backstage, two kids make an unfortunate pose facing two life-sized Undertaker posters whose crotches just happen to be at mouth level. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A military man starts barking orders at the top of the stage, identifying himself as The Commandant of The Truth Commission. He gives a long, boring speech about democracy straight out of Star Wars Episode 3. He says he Truth Commission’s mission is to study the effects of democracy on stupid, liberal Americans, which initially earns him boos for being anti-American. Then he just keeps on talking, earning him boos for being some nobody who is wasting minutes of valuable airtime during what is supposed to be a wrestling show. The highlight of his promo is the introduction of another promo, this one a pre-taped one from Bret Hart on a WWF tour of South Africa, where Raw is War will be held next week. Hart carries the South African flag to the ring. There is also a cut-away shot of Shawn Michaels sitting in the locker room watching the pre-taped promo. Hey, isn’t there another wrestling show on another channel right now? Vince closes the segment by commenting on the latest WWF Magazine cover, which features Bret Hart and Bart Simpson. We’ll have to take his word for it, as Kevin Dunn’s production team misses its cue and fails to put the cover on screen. Coming up later tonight, says Vince, is a “no holds exhibition” featuring Ken Shamrock. Vince has no excuse for messing up that phrase; he co-wrote a whole screenplay with Hulk Hogan called “No Holds Barred.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Shawn Michaels comes out to the ring for an interview with Vince, posing while a fan’s sign blocks the camera. Shawn says he wants to get something off his chest, leading to cheers from the women in the audience. HBK says that Bret Hart has always been a “bad guy” who exploits his family on TV for money, even being willing to sell Helen if it could make him money. I shudder to think who’d be willing to pay up. Shawn complains that Bret didn’t like it one bit when he had to “return the favor” to him at Wrestlemania, when Michaels won the title. In fact, he had to be forced, “kicking and screaming”, to drop the belt… which I thought was the whole point of title matches. Michaels then outed Vince McMahon as “the boss” to get him to back up his claim that the WWF did its best business in six years with Bret gone. And as for Bret coming back to the Federation out of his loyalty to the fans, that’s “a load of horseshit”, because he leveraged his way to a big-money contract by negotiating with WCW. Bret can’t separate his WWF persona from real life, which, if we are to believe kayfabe, is the exact same thing. It’s then time to do his proto-Cena shtick about how it’s great that the fans can boo him or cheer him, because of the First Amendment. Then, in some frighteningly prophetic words, Shawn warns Bret that his obsession with him and the WWF title will be his destruction. He then closes his promo by dedicating his striptease to Bret Hart, then dancing up on Vince. However, Davey Boy and Owen come to the ring to break up the show before we even get to see so much as a nipple. Shawn arms himself with a chair, which keeps Smith and Hart at bay even though it’s covered in padding. He does a handstand to close the first hour.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It’s now time for the first match in half an hour. Unfortunately, it involves the Headbangers, and worse yet, they are the odds-on favorites to win, as their opponents are Barry Horowitz and Freddie Joe Floyd. A man in the crowd with his t-shirt tucked into his jeans pledges his lifelong allegiance to the heavy metal duo. Thrasher executes a waistlock takedown on Horowitz, who wrestles out of the hold with a <b>Nice Maneuever</b> (#1) that warrants a pat on the back. He follows this up with a headlock takedown, then is pushed into the ropes only to slap on another headlock after Thrasher drops to the mat with a <b>Telegraphed Maneuver</b> (#2). Barry is kicking ass. It looks like a good night for underdogs, so Vernon White, an unknown MMA fighter, comments on his upcoming exhibition against Ken Shamrock. White stands a fighting chance, given that this is a “no holds” match, meaning the ankle lock and every other submission move is presumably barred. The Headbangers shift the momentum until Horowitz hits a jawbreaker on Mosh and makes the tag to Freddie Joe Floyd. Jim Ross notes that the Jack and Jerry Brisco went to grade school in Floyd’s hometown of Bowlegs, Oklahoma, which is a mighty coincidence considering that their real names are Freddie Joe and Floyd, respectively. The ‘Bangers hit their combination leg drop/powerbomb double-team for “a cover, a count, and a victory.” </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Vernon White is already in the ring as porno music plays over the speakers. I’m not sure which film it comes from; perhaps “Rear Naked Choke 6”. I made that title up, but there almost certainly is a real porno by that name. Shamrock enters with his name on the screen along with a graphic of a flaming trash can that is unfortunately too large to fit in its frame. As Ken and Vernon exchange kicks, one announcer laments that the “no holds barred style fighting is most misunderstood by individuals in America.” Vince McMahon continues to defend the sport, adding that no one has been seriously hurt in the UFC. I guess he figures that UFC will never be competition for the WWF, so he might as well promote it for the sake of getting Shamrock over. Immediately afterwards, Shamrock punches his opponent’s bloody face repeatedly until he taps out. Despite some obvious editing and quick cuts, it’s obvious that White is bleeding from both the back and front of the head. While Shamrock is being interviewed, Vader comes to ringside. It takes one Patterson, one Dohn, and two Hebners to keep them apart.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">A replay after the commercial gets a clear shot of that fag. You know, the one Pat Patterson keeps behind his ear. Shame on you, Pat. Smokers are losers (Razor Ramon, 1994). Vader faces Frank Stiletto in the fourth consecutive jobber match. Vader launches Stiletto across the blood-stained ring with a German suplex, and just generally beats the stuffing out of him (no pun intended, since it’s nowhere near Thanksgiving). Vader wins after a series of bombs, both Vader- and power-. A noticeably thin Gorilla Monsoon addresses Sid’s absence just minutes before his scheduled main event with Mankind. He names Steve Austin as Sid’s substitute in case the big man doesn’t show, which Stone Cold takes exception to, having already wrestled tonight. Austin demands that he take Sid’s spot against Bret Hart at the next pay-per-view, to which Gorilla agrees. Smart move, as softball opening day is approaching, and Sid won’t be back anytime soon.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Jim Ross interviews Mankind in the ring about burning The Undertaker, whom he resents for his “fancy cars” and “posh hotel rooms”. Breaking kayfabe is the theme of the night apparently, as few would imagine the Dead Man driving a Porsche or living it up in any accommodations larger than a casket. Mankind mentions his wife and children, than chastises the audience for not picturing him with a family. He’s talking about reality, he says, just like WWE’s current “Reality Era”, except for the part where he mentions his seventeen concussions. Mankind quotes The Kinks’ <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x0hWhCOx4U8" target="_blank">“Give The People What They Want”</a> regarding the audience’s bloodlust. Paul Bearer holds up a second Mankind mask, which Taker is going to need after Mankind is through with him. Taker’s voice then echoes throughout the arena, managing to use the phrase “eternal damnation” twice.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Stone Cold comes to the ring to wrestle Mankind, thus booting Sid from the Bret Hart match and rendering inconsequential Bret Hart’s repeated interference against Sid in the dreadful Wrestlemania event. The two brawl on the outside before the match officially begins. Kayfabe-breaking continues when Bulldog appears on the split-screen to scold Vince McMahon for booking Stone Cold against Mankind when, just minutes earlier in the broadcast, it was on-screen authority figure Gorilla Monsoon who made the match on the spur of the moment. Owen covers for him by singling out Monsoon. As Stone Cold continues brawling with his opponent, Vince notes that Mankind is “no Billy Gunn”, with apologies to Mr. Gunn. Even as the two men finally make it into the ring, the bell does not sound. Austin used the ropes for leverage for his chinlock before noticing Bulldog and Owen in the crowd and begging them on.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Bulldog and Owen, who are still standing in “the cheap seats”, appear on the Titantron overlooking the ring, perhaps to get a better view of the action. Is that how that works? Jim Ross announces a newly-made match between The Godwinns and their accidental slopping-victims, The Legion of Doom. JR must have heard about that match from President Gorilla Monsoon, since he’s the boss in the WWF, I think. Mankind attempts a piledriver on the ramp (actually, on Austin, but while standing on the ramp), but Austin pushes him off into the guard rail. Bulldog and Owen make their way through the crowd and hop the rail, but are cut off by LOD before they can interfere. It’s revenge for the tag team champions’ “shenanigans”. Vader then comes to the ring and charges at Austin, who sidesteps the “mastodon”, causing him to collide with his partner Mankind, causing a disqualification for… uh, Austin? Mankind? There is no official announcement. The two Paul Bearer clients punch each other briefly, until their manager calms them down and the broadcast ends.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</span> <br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">2 Maneuvers (Year total: 58)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-81393496055185258912016-01-01T11:03:00.000-05:002016-01-01T11:04:44.174-05:00Raw #203 - March 31st, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Raw (is War) opens without its Marilyn Manson intro while “Thorn in Your Eye” plays throughout the arena. I guess Manson and his record company didn’t appreciate all the free publicity Vince was giving him! Tonight, The British Bulldog defends the European title for the first time, facing the man he beat to win the title, Owen Hart. Hart dropkicks his tag team partner as he tries to enter the ring. A flying body press fails to put Bulldog away in the opening seconds, so Hart delivers a blatant kick to the groin in full view of the referee. The match continues anyway between the two “brother-in-laws”, as Vince repeatedly calls them. After some back-and-forth, Owen hits a piledriver right before the break.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A replay of action during the commercial break shows a false finish where Owen pinned Davey, but the match continued because Smith had his foot on the rope. Owen tries to hit a front dropkick from the top rope for a <b>High-Risk Maneuver </b>(#1), but Davey Boy catches him and puts the Sharpshooter on him for a Submission <b>Maneuver</b> (#2). Owen escapes and counters with an enziguiri. Bulldog ends up on the outside, where he catches Owen in a plancha attempt and drops his neck across the guard rail. Owen kicks out of a slingshot to the turnbuckle. Bulldog then sends a running Owen Hart into the stratosphere with a flapjack. Owen tries to walk away from the match, but gets stopped by Davey and suplexed on the ramp. Back in the ring, Bulldog charges at Owen, who leapfrogs him, sending him into the referee. Owen tries to use a chair but fails. Bret Hart runs in and grabs the chair from Bulldog and chokes him with it, then gets between the two opponents and “brother-in-laws” to calm them down. Hitman grabs the mic and tells Davey and Owen to stop fighting to please the American fans who have no family values. He tells Owen he loves him and the two (and later three) share an embrace that the fans boo, but that makes Jerry Lawler cry. Vince isn’t buying it.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sunny comes to the ring, knowing that the fans want her (as suggested by her theme music). She joins the commentary team and snubs JR’s attempt at a handshake. Sunny says she was touched by Bret, Owen, and Davey Boy. Well, I already knew she had been touched by Davey Boy and maybe Bret. Mexican unknown El Mosco (“The Fly”) comes to the ring to take on Super Nova, not to be confused with the future Simon Dean, who is wrestling in ECW at this time. JR does some promotional announcements for upcoming events until Sunny interrupts to deliver the copy herself. I think she just really wanted to say “Ball State” (as in “testicles”). The announcers largely ignore the in-ring action, as do the fans in attendance, who start a small “Sunny” chant. Sunny speaks a bit of Spanish, asking Lawler whether JR is “gordo en el chocho”, meaning, uh, <a href="https://translate.google.com/#es/en/gordo%20en%20el%20chocho" target="_blank">“fat in the pussy.”</a> King asks her to repeat that, and she asks in Spanish whether JR is fat and chubby (“gordo y rechoncho”). After Mosco hits a <b>Maneuver</b> (#3 - spinning heel kick), Vince tries to get in on the fun and gives a count of “un, deux, trois.” That’s French, McMahon. While Sunny tries to teach Vince some elementary-level español, Super Nova hits a sunset flip powerbomb on Mosco. He then does a diving headscissors that Vince declares he misses, but that Mosco sells anyway. Sunny decides to go “south of the border” (Hey-o!) and flirts with the Spanish announce table. Super Nova attempts and misses a <b>Maneuver</b> (#4 - moonsault), which vince notes he “really messed up on.” Mosco springs off the top rope for a moonsault to win the match, which Vince barely notices. Sunny then holds the very sensitive Jerry Lawler in light of the emotional Hart family reunion.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Kevin Kelly tells fans to order a life-sized Undertaker poster from a phone number that has most certainly been taken over by some other company, but which I urge you to dial right now. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">JR interviews the LOD in the ring and asks them about their upcoming tag team title match against Owen Hart and Davey Boy Smith. Hawk vows to knock the “doggy dumplings” out of the British Bulldog to stinky-kick the phlegm out of every corpuscle of that stinky Owen Hart’s stinky body.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Honky Tonk Man is here yet again to scout for the next Elvis impersonator he can manage to the Intercontinental title. “Double J” walks to the ring holding the hand of “guest manager” Nathan Arnold, age 6, while crooning about having sex with his girlfriend later in the evening. Honky Tonk is impressed by Jesse Jammes’s vocals. “Jammes”, who is near the top of Honky’s short-list, easily defeats Jerry Fox with a pumphandle drop. Honky steps into the ring and offers to mold Jesse in his image and take him to the top. He then presents him with a family “hairloom” of a guitar on the condition of “consummating” the deal. Double J sounds like he’s going to accept the deal, but instead he smashes the guitar. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Savio Vega and Crush take on Rod Bell and Adam O’Brien. Shawn Michaels is on the phone and mocks Vince’s questions about how Bret Hart’s figure four last week affected his knee injury. He’ll be there next Raw to meet Bret face-to-face. Savio and Crush win with Demolition’s old elbow drop/backbreaker finisher.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A promo package for Ken Shamrock airs featuring footage from the upstart UFC. He participates in a “no-holds-barred exhibition” next week. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirllsF3desZ16KAjWSq89vLqAVYFS2noFTmLkhtFicQbCJafoHVwL7DC5en5iNhyphenhyphenPkk726fTZKNWDnAdjrdgX_liQqKYB7OcidOiI1kfgL8sb9VVs4AXxJHNh6WYhCYn6VntXRVNkJ_Ko/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-12-31+at+4.38.03+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="145" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirllsF3desZ16KAjWSq89vLqAVYFS2noFTmLkhtFicQbCJafoHVwL7DC5en5iNhyphenhyphenPkk726fTZKNWDnAdjrdgX_liQqKYB7OcidOiI1kfgL8sb9VVs4AXxJHNh6WYhCYn6VntXRVNkJ_Ko/s200/Screen+Shot+2015-12-31+at+4.38.03+PM.png" width="200" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Backstage, an apprehensive Paul Bearer sits down in front of a casket like it’s his desk.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Pyro goes off to mark the second hour of “Raw is War.” “Explosion! Contusion! Concussion!” screams Vince McMahon. It's strange to hear the word "concussion" tossed around so loosely. This was, of course, back in the innocent days when everyone thought that concussions were good for you (or so we’re led to believe). </span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVqIzXF-mQwNjhSXUcsZmR6OCpWHiSDRui3kE3Gq4wie6giq1FsnspkA2xg8TuVq77UxTwXvcSqb3o_yNQcfbZmi1YJbMlZjZAFYsXvBAyDb_qNBaslh3dsyjLPRjtC2D-FsutC6_KmjA/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-01-01+at+10.57.11+AM.png" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVqIzXF-mQwNjhSXUcsZmR6OCpWHiSDRui3kE3Gq4wie6giq1FsnspkA2xg8TuVq77UxTwXvcSqb3o_yNQcfbZmi1YJbMlZjZAFYsXvBAyDb_qNBaslh3dsyjLPRjtC2D-FsutC6_KmjA/s200/Screen+Shot+2016-01-01+at+10.57.11+AM.png" width="200" /></a></span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuvWjvA2xe2gBd1-LXcC3Rhvpz3t70yhQEycNnsvhQyRssYrEh4pBkoLqReI6vwrjoCVNJ99V2Zz3pQfJFMOFwNCC2Ga6cKuLCYiMjzyC6Ro1ak4vqq_TSOPF5iEi7TNCxOFt28ZKxYk0/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-12-31+at+4.52.10+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="146" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuvWjvA2xe2gBd1-LXcC3Rhvpz3t70yhQEycNnsvhQyRssYrEh4pBkoLqReI6vwrjoCVNJ99V2Zz3pQfJFMOFwNCC2Ga6cKuLCYiMjzyC6Ro1ak4vqq_TSOPF5iEi7TNCxOFt28ZKxYk0/s200/Screen+Shot+2015-12-31+at+4.52.10+PM.png" width="200" /></a></span> <br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Paul Bearer comes to the ring to try to reconcile with The Undertaker (again) after last week’s closing segment got cut off by La Femme Nikita. Bearer admits he has made a mistake (a mistake that included burying him alive) but begs Taker to take him back. Taker walks over and locks Bearer’s desk (by which I mean a casket) as a safety precaution. Undertaker admits that he owes Paul Bearer for his many years of guidance, then hands over the title to Bearer before clocking him with a right hand. “That’s for making me feud with Kamala and Giant Gonzalez and Mr. Hughes and Fake Undertaker and IRS and King Kong Bundy and Kama and Mabel!” says Taker (probably). Mankind emerges from under the ring and throws a fireball in Taker’s face after obviously lighting up a piece of flash paper. Sid chases off Mankind, while Taker stumbles around in the audience to sell being blinded. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sid cuts a promo on Mankind on Undertaker’s behalf before Triple H makes his entrance, sans Chyna. Jerry Lawler sympathizes more with Mankind, claiming his mandible claw is actually bionic and caught fire. Goldust arrives without Marlena and attacks HHH before the bell, whipping him into the turnbuckles, which flips the Blue Blood upside every time. Vince gives us a very informative update on the Undertaker, who has suffered burns to the “facial area.” Thank you, Vince. Jerry Lawler is more concerned with the Harts than with The Undertaker and suggests that JR join the Heaven’s Gate cult and, by implication, commit suicide. Helmsley takes control early in the match and dominates throughout most of the segment. Despite the pre-match stipulation, Chyna shows up on the stage before the commercial. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Goldust hits the Curtain Call on Hunter, but Chyna kicks Goldust in the ribs before he can pin him. She and Hunter put the boots to Goldust before a team of referees can separate them. Helmsley strikes two officials, including Pat Patterson, who gets into a fist-fight with him. Chyna intervenes to rescue Helmsley, then stomps Patterson in the “groin area.” Goldust knocks Helmsley out of the ring and has a confrontation with Chyna that is broken up by referees. You know, Goldust and Pat Patterson have a lot in common: they both don’t like Hunter Hearst Helmsley. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Steve Austin comes to the ring for an interview with Vince McMahon. He says he never said “I Quit” in his Wrestlemania match (which is true). Austin thus joins an exclusive club that includes only Bob Backlund. He doesn’t care whether he’s in the ring with a “good guy” or a “bad guy,” he’s going to “whip somebody’s ass” no matter what the fans think. He then urges Bret Hart to “put on a clean pair of panties” and fight him right now. Bret argues that he indeed kicked Austin’s ass at Wrestlemania before making on a long and complex metaphor about Austin being a hyena coming back with his tail between his legs but he doesn’t have a tail and he isn’t laughing because Bret Hart is the real king of the jungle. Austin says that Bret will have to kill him before he can be finished with him, then gloats that he will one day kill Bret Hart from whipping his ass too hard. Bret Hart wrestles next against Rocky Maivia, whom JR refers to as “The Rock.”</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret keeps everyone waiting as he comes through the curtain long after he is introduced. Vince calls Bret “Mr. Family Values” sarcastically, as if reconciling with his brother and brother-in-law didn’t negate the countless affairs Hitman has while on the road. Vince also assures us that Rocky Johnson will not interfere in Rocky Maivia’s match tonight, as he has promised. Jerry Lawler points out how little family values mean in America, as Johnson had previously broken his promise to his son. Perhaps The King is unaware that Rocky Johnson is Canadian. Bret stalls at the beginning of the match, giving McMahon an opportunity to plug USA’s Tuesday Night Fights in classic Vince McMahon fashion. “And by the way, ladies and gentlemen, Tuesday Night Fights knock me out indeed, and they’ll knock you out as well.” Bret, according to Vince, still is the Excellence of Execution as far as <b>Wrestling Maneuvers</b> (#5) go. Not realizing the historical significance of this match, Bret Hart and The Rock have a very basic match, with Hart methodically beating down Rocky. Jerry Lawler points out that Tony Atlas is sitting at ringside, perhaps to interfere on Rocky Johnson’s behalf. So basically, Tony Atlas is a foot soldier. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Bret continues to dominate Maivia until Rocky surprises him with a small package (not to be confused with his strudel). Rocky later avoids an elbow smash from the second rope to make a fiery comeback that rallies the crowd behind him until he does his stupid dance and the fans scratch their heads. Maivia hits a rare fisherman’s suplex on Hart for a two-count, followed by a belly-to-belly and a floatover DDT. The fans boo anyway. Bret rolls through Maivia’s flying body press for a two-count before putting him in the figure four on the ring post. Bret gets DQ’ed for refusing to release the hold. Hart thus does not begin his third IC title reign, I think the real tragedy here is that Hitman never showed The Rock how to apply the Sharpshooter. Steve Austin attacks Bret Hart but immediately gets jumped by Davey Boy and Owen. The LOD storm the ringside area to chase off the Harts.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">
Final tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">5 Maneuvers (Year total: 55)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-41183657240354288202015-11-08T17:55:00.000-05:002016-01-01T11:04:05.844-05:00Raw #202 - March 24th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The Raw after Wrestlemania 13 opens with a long pan across the front row. Jim Ross informs us that Mankind is the number-one contender to The Undertaker’s WWF title, even though astute viewers who stayed awake during last night’s pay-per-view would know that Mankind got counted out in the tag team match. The Headbangers, who won an unannounced and terrible four-way tag team elimination match last night, get their promised title shot against Davey Boy (who has two titles) and Owen (who has two Slammys… and a title). The tag team champions after this match will face The Road Warriors at the next In Your House.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">LOD, who are introduced as “two interested parties” to this tag team match, cut a backstage inset promo. “Interested” is a word not often used to describe someone watching a Headbangers match. Vince asks Hawk about the kitchen sink they used last night ,and we learn that Hawk doesn’t like stainless steel. Bulldog gives Thrasher a delayed vertical suplex, giving the fans a clear shot up the Headbanger’s skirt. On the split-screen, both Bret Hart and Chyna are advertised for later in the show. One wants to get something off his chest, and the other one wants to get two things put in her chest. Bulldog accidentally knocks Owen off the apron and nearly gets pinned. Owen storms out in a huff, leaving Davey Boy to fend for himself.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Owen Hart is back by the time the commercial break is over, but his distraction of the referee allows the Headbangers to double-team his partner. Vince notes that the smoke from the opening pyro is just beginning to clear, then implies that Owen isn’t putting forth enough effort to take the tag from Bulldog. After a double-DDT, Davey Boy manages to make the tag to Owen, who gives Thrasher a backbreaker before tagging the weary Bulldog right back in. The two argue before Vince apologizes for referring to Vader as the number-one-contender. He didn’t. Owen tags back in and puts Thrasher in the sharpshooter, only for Mosh to break up the hold. Bulldog powerslams Thrasher and tries to put Owen on top for the pin, to which Owen takes exception. Owen asks Bulldog, “What the fuck was that?” (which the censors mute a second too late). During the argument, Davey Boy shoves the referee, drawing a disqualification. Bulldog gives Owen a double-leg takedown; the two brawl on the mat until a swarm of referees pull them apart. “Bulldog, I am sick and tired of your crap!” says Owen, holding the mic. Well then maybe they should wrestle in a dog-poop match, as Bulldog would do two-and-a-half years later on this very program. Instead, he demands a European championship match. Bulldog says he doesn’t care if Owen won ten Slammys (for which I’m sure he was reprimanded by Vince later on; no one denigrates the Slammy Awatds!) and says he’ll give him one title only.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh07Q2mph81ZxhoBzZKFe7l55iIE8z2qNR9jf10iDL-H0YybHwr7DMMzlPtOG2dpltebdhJz4XbQQUIUi4vruVKRl3CLkWGVtUFtbkEXIAPDdBYZqUD2cxlN0f5FEUTAQjo4cwZFZI85DI/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-11-01+at+4.08.32+PM.png" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="147" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh07Q2mph81ZxhoBzZKFe7l55iIE8z2qNR9jf10iDL-H0YybHwr7DMMzlPtOG2dpltebdhJz4XbQQUIUi4vruVKRl3CLkWGVtUFtbkEXIAPDdBYZqUD2cxlN0f5FEUTAQjo4cwZFZI85DI/s200/Screen+Shot+2015-11-01+at+4.08.32+PM.png" width="200" /></a></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Backstage in a dark room, Mankind cuts a promo about Uncle Paul being “gone,” which Jim Ross takes to mean that Paul Bearer died. Sixteen years later, he actually did die. Whoa, prophetic!</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Sponsoring tonight’s Raw is Discovery Zone, which Jerry says is “the ultimate entertanment spot, and it’s just for kids!” I’m sure Jerry’s a big fan. Bret Hart gets on the big screen, which Vince refers to as “our Titantron.” Bret says he needs Vince to promise him that he’ll have all the time he needs to get things off his chest, to which Vince agrees, provided he doesn’t use any profanity like last week. Unfortunately, the fans in attendance can’t hear Vince’s side of the conversation, so it sounds to them like Bret is talking to himself. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Bart Gunn is in the ring during all this, awaiting his opponent Triple H, who arrives with Chyna. Goldust gets an inset interview crying over Marlena’s empty director’s chair. Next week, Goldust will face Triple H and promises that there will be no more sequels. Vince informs us that that match will be for the Intercontinental Championship, somehow, despite the fact that Rocky Maivia is the champion. JR says that it’s not about titles next week, which is good because neither man has a title at the moment. During the boring match, Bart Gunn slams Hunter against the ropes with a <b>Clever Maneuver</b> (#1 - stun gun). The Best Hair Slammy-winner goes on the defensive as the future Brawl-for-All winner takes control. Chyna pulls down the top rope, sending Bart to the floor, then scoop slams the cowboy. Unbelievable, says Vince. As Bart tries to re-enter, Chyna pushes him into the ring post. A replay shows that Chyna didn’t pull down the rope in time, so Bart Gunn fell out of the ring on his own, though the announcers pretend otherwise. Helmsley hits the Pedigree for the victory.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Slammy highlights air, including Todd Pettengill singing a “Girl From Ipanema” parody implying that Chyna has a penis and Triple H does not. Also, George the superfan wet his pants because of the Undertaker. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Three little-known masked luchadors take on three other little-known luchadors in WWF’s transparent attempt to compete with Nitro. Vince announces that Stone Cold is not in the arena tonight, thus deflating any attempt to beat Nitro’s ratings. Bret Hart gets on the split-screen and complains that he isn’t getting his time, saying the word, “time” on five occasions in the span of about five seconds. Vince tells him that he will have his time laster on tonight, then focuses back on the colorfully attired luchadors, whom he calls, “matadors.” The team of presumed babyfaces wins after some aimless flippy action that draws little reaction from the apathetic fans. No wonder Russo thought Mexicans would never get over in America. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Kevin Kelly narrates a commercial for the “Wrestle Vessel,” a Caribbean Cruise featuring the WWF superstars, who he claims will “bare it all.” So, they’re going to be naked?</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicKTrc6BKhnqLczhLupn0dJ_uP_W-sI1OKBegabmUC-WgHDJMKQkqvIRjutTWErm-Sh6uW0lWnW6C0ErqdlM8iTZCpCH-F-5voUHVEcwyoNdjs1QBe1qj0LDSpcR9Nl5xR_1b7sTyjabQ/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-11-01+at+4.50.18+PM.png" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="148" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicKTrc6BKhnqLczhLupn0dJ_uP_W-sI1OKBegabmUC-WgHDJMKQkqvIRjutTWErm-Sh6uW0lWnW6C0ErqdlM8iTZCpCH-F-5voUHVEcwyoNdjs1QBe1qj0LDSpcR9Nl5xR_1b7sTyjabQ/s200/Screen+Shot+2015-11-01+at+4.50.18+PM.png" width="200" /></a></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Rockies Johnson and Maivia discuss last night’s Wrestlemania in a pre-recorded clip from before the show.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Honky Tonk Man is still searching for his new protege, so he sits in on Flash Funk’s match against The Brooklyn Brawler. I don’t think Flash wants to be the next “Honky” anything. Vince notes that <b>High-Risk Maneuvers</b> (#2) like Funk’s often backfire. The Honkster claims that he rejected the Funkettes after they requested to be “Honkettes.” He then directly contradicts himself by claiming that he wants to make them Honkettes. They may have hooters, but can they honk? Brawler gets his knees up to counter Funk’s standing moonsault. JR apologizes to Jerry Lawler in advance for the advertising copy he has to read for the movie “Major League,” wherein he describes the Cleveland Indians as “misfit losers.” Jerry Lawler claims that a kick from Flash Funk knocked one of Brawler’s teeth out. He always says that, though. Flash wins with a <b>Maneuver </b>(#3 - 450 splash).</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">After an ad for the Wrestlemania 13 hockey jersey and denim jacket, in which Sable models clothes for the first of many times on Raw, Ken Shamrock is interviewed on the Titantron by Vince and gets booed. He explains why he stopped the Bret-Austin match last night. The fans, who again can only hear one side of this conversation, cheer when a still of Shamrock taking down Bret Hart appears on the Tron. The boos get louder when Bret appears, pacing back and forth backstage in preparation for his promo at the top of the hour.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">It’s time! It’s time! It’s Bret Hart’s time, which he has been requesting all night! Jerry Lawler wants Vince McMahon to do the interview based on what Bret did to Vince last week, but it’s JR in the ring instead. Bret Hart starts out by apologizing to his fans in Europe, Japan, the Middle East, South Africa, and Canada, but refuses to apologize to his fans in the US. He doesn’t understand why the fans cheered Stone Cold last night, even though he lost. He also rails against Shawn Michaels for wearing earrings, having tattoos, and posing for a gay magazine. Actually, his exact words were that Shawn has “got earrings all over himself.” Disturbing images aside, if Shawn’s got rings on other body parts besides his ears, they’re no longer earrings. Vince seethes as Bret recounts the many (goddamn) injustices he has suffered since returning to the Federation, which the American fans have all been fine with. “You know he is telling the truth, McMahon,” says Jerry Lawler, siding with the Hitman for the first time since, well, ever. Hitman can’t get over the fact that Americans cheer for people like “Charles Manson and OJ Simpson” and other universally beloved American heroes, finally ending his diatribe by telling the American wrestling fans coast to coast to kiss his ass, in so many words (those words being, “The American wrestling fans coast to coast can kiss my ass.”). <br />
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Enter Shawn Michaels to a mixture of boos and cheers. Michaels implies that Bret always refuses to drop the title (compared to Michaels’s five title forfeitures and counting), then celebrates that he chooses to live his life “openly and freely.” So, it actually <i>was</i> a gay magazine he posed for? He then gives a Cena-style speech about how the fans have a right to cheer or boo whomever they want. “It’s called freedom of expression,” explains Vince. “Tough titty, said the kitty,” adds Michaels. Go on, read that sentence again. Yeah, he actually said that. Baloney, fudge, and mustard, Michaels was Cena before Cena! HBK challenges Bret to a fight right then and there, even though he is admittedly in no shape to compete. Bret refuses, so Michaels says that the only reason that Bret knew Shawn was in Playgirl was because he had looked at the issue himself. Zing! It was either that, or Bret saw it on TV when the WWF advertised it. Bret waits until Michaels turns his back to leave, then kicks him in his injured, injured knee before locking him in the dreaded figure-four leglock on the ring post, which doesn’t actually hurt. Shawn is wearing loafers tonight, by the way, which is a nice change of pace from the cowboy boots. Mike Chioda, Gerald Brisco and Vince McMahon himself have to pry Bret off. Sid comes to ringside and Bret exits the premises, flipping the bird on the way up the ramp.</span></td> <td><span id="goog_696222752"></span><span id="goog_696222753"></span><br />
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Next up is Rocky Maivia, who comes out to generic drum-and-bass music to slap hands with the fans. Hey! What’s he doing with that belt? Oh, right. He’s the Intercontinental champion. After a commercial break, the match has already begun. Bret Hart comes to ringside again to interject himself into this boring match, a trend that started last night at Wrestlemania when he kept interfering in the abysmal main event. While everyone’s paying attention to Bret, Leif Cassidy hits an alley-oop on Maivia, whose title is not on the line tonight. On the split-screen, Shawn Michaels is seen being helped out of the arena with a giant bag of ice on his knee. Meanwhile, Bret does commentary at ringside, where Vince tells him that he’s flushing his legacy down the toilet. Bret runs with the toilet-flushing metaphor by blaming the American fans for flushing his toilet. He saw little kids holding up signs saying he sucks, when it is in fact those little kids who suck. The production people were kind enough to mute the word “suck,” no doubt appeasing those fans who were frustrated by last week’s abusive language from the Hitman. Actually, “frustrated” wasn’t the goddamn word for it; it was bullshit. Rocky Maivia hits a flying body press on Leif to win the match before being blindsided by Hart. Leif Cassidy gives the Hitman an appreciative thumbs-up for his efforts. Hart, in turn, flips off a fan at ringside. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Vince plugs the encore of Wrestlemania 13, which he assures us may be the greatest Wrestlemania ever. Faarooq has been sideline with a separated shoulder and a punctured lung after last night’s street fight, so it’s Savio going one-on-one with Ahmed in the de facto main event. Next week, Vince reminds us, it will be Triple H versus Goldust “when Raw continues to be War.” Ahmed picks up and crotches Savio on the top rope, the topples him with a running shoulder tackle, sending both men to the floor before the break. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Vince and the announce crew continue to wonder why the rest of the Nation of Domination is keeping their distance at the top of the entrance ramp. Ahmed somersaults off the top rope onto Savio, but misses a follow-up running elbow drop. Savio fights back with a crescent kick, after which he poses in a martial arts stance, forgetting that he isn’t Kwang any more. Savio locks Ahmed in a sleeper hold for a minute, but Ahmed escapes and hits Vega with a uranage. The rest of the Nation approaches the ring, drawing a disqualification. Ahmed then grabs the mic and says that their feud has gone on too long (and it has). He challenges any one of them to a match where, if Ahmed wins, the nation has to leave the WWF. Sounds like a fair deal. Ahmed poses Hogan-style, cupping his hand to his ear, but the Nation doesn’t respond and heads back up the ramp. As Ahmed leaves, he slams against the ramp his 2x4, which flies out of his hand and he has to pick up. Paul Bearer paces back and forth backstage awaiting The Undertaker’s promo. Poor Paul will probably be completely blown up by the time Taker comes to the ring. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Vince screws up his intro of The Undertaker: “Would you please welcome me… in… Here comes the new World Wrestling Federation Champion!” “Who will ever, ever forget,” says JR, “Bret Hart’s interference that certainly led to Sycho Sid’s demise?” The answer: everyone. The only thing today’s fans remember about that match is that Sid crapped his pants in the middle of it, and that didn’t even really happen. Undertaker is sporting his fabulous leather hat tonight. He says that he will fight for all the creatures. I guess that makes him The Creature’s Champion. Undertaker also gives Sid credit and offers him a rematch in the future, which Sid never received due to injury and/or the start of softball season. Taker acknowledges that his first title reign was short because he lost his edge; actually, it was short because Hulk Hogan threw the charred remains of a dead guy into his eyes and rolled him up for a pin. Paul Bearer interrupts the promo as Taker starts talking about Mankind. Bearer pleads with him that everything he has done, he has done for The Undertaker, while Mankind yells for Uncle Paul via the Titantron. Raw goes off the air right in the middle of the segment so that viewers can watch La Femme Nikita in its entirety as advertised. </span></td> <td><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">3 Maneuvers (Year total: 50)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">1 Ahmed Johnson wedgie</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-82863691699653267702015-09-27T15:27:00.000-04:002015-09-27T15:27:38.627-04:00Raw #201 - March 17th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince again refers to tonight’s arena as “The War Zone,” not to be confused with the War Room, where Billionaire Ted and his buddies plot in vain to snatch up WWF Superstars like Razor Ramon, Diesel, and the 123 Kid. Faarooq is AWOL from his locker room, while Ahmed looks straight at a backstage monitor with his back to the camera like a normal person would, instead of standing off to the side and craning his neck like today’s superstars do. Shortly thereafter, he is hit from behind by Faarooq; I guess that’s why no one watches TV like that on Raw anymore. Johnson keels over in a heap of trash cans and clown pants. Back in the ring, the Road Warriors set up for the Doomsday Device, but Faarooq breaks it up with his nightstick, drawing a DQ. Ahmed the Clown rushes to the ring with a 2x4 to help out the Road Warriors. Team Bum Rush cleans house and takes out PG-13.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Larry Flynt Freedom of Speech Slammy is advertised, featuring nominees such as Howard Stern. Vince tells us when and where we can watch the Slammys, but gives the wrong time. The announcers then tease that tonight’s cage match may not be for the WWF title. What a way to get fans to stay tuned! Shawn Michaels may also be on his way to the arena (or is that, “war zone”?). </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Triple H comes to the ring with the woman now known as Chyna. Flash Funk is Hunter’s opponent, accompanied by the Funkettes, who will be competing as a unit in the Miss Slammy competition this Friday. Flash and Chyna have a small skirmish before the bell, but “you can’t hit a lady,” says Vince. That must mean you really can’t hit Sable, who as we all know is quite a lady (a classy lady, if you would). Vince notes Hunter’s “obsequious” bow and “air of pompisity” [sic]. Speaking of “classy,” Vince praises Flash Funk’s <b>Classy Maneuvers </b>(#1) before adding that they are also “flashy,” which is probably what he meant to say to begin with. Flash then counters a <b>Telegraphed Maneuver </b>(#2) by Helmsley. Hunter catches Flash on his shoulders following a leapfrog, dropping Funk down onto his own shoulders. The crowd is hot, much like Peeta Wilson of La Femma Nikita, which will air in its entirety after Raw. Flash hits a flying leg drop on Hunter, but gets pulled off Helmsley by Chyna. Hunter hits a German suplex, but misses a <b>Risk-Taking Maneuver</b> (#3) when Flash hits him with a superkick. Funk signals for a top rope move, but Chyna threatens to push him off the rope, distracting him before eating the Pedigree (not the dog food). HHH pins the Funkster. Shawn Michaels enters the arena, although he surely will be unable to inject himself into any of the in-ring action, what with his injured knee and his career being over.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mini Mankind and Mini Vader, who teamed up weeks before their full-sized counterparts ever did, square off against Mini Goldust and Mascarita Sagrada, Jr. Does that mean he’s a mini version of Máscara Sagrada, Sr., or the son of the mini version of Máscara Sagrada, Jr.? We see footage from a New Jersey press conference announcing the death of a tax bill preventing “The War Zone” from appearing in New Jersey. the Undertaker presented a paper tombstone to Governor Christine Todd Whitman, who looks like Linda McMahon, but not as much as the woman to her right, who looks even more like Linda McMahon because she is Linda McMahon. Mini Goldust (not to be confused with Stardust) starts off with Mini Vader, no doubt hooking in viewers who would otherwise be watching that silly cruiserweight division on Nitro. While the announcers marvel at the news on JR’s Superstar Line that a WWF Superstar had recently been strip-searched at an airport, Mascarita Sagrada, Jr. pins Mankind with a victory roll. After the match, he hits a flying body press off the stage onto Mini Vader.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Gorilla Monsoon delivers the major announcement that the WWF title match announced last week will be a WWF tile match as previously announced. Earth-shattering! </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The earth-shattering announcement gives Bret Hart occasion to come to the ring for an interview with Kevin Kelly, back when long in-ring promos at least had the superficial appearance of a scheduled interview. Fans boo Hart as he justifies his title shot just a week before Wrestlemania. He assures The Undertaker that he will give him a title shot down the line, which is a relief to all the Undertaker fans wanting Taker to get the title shot he earned (how exactly, I don’t know, but it might have to do with putting up with long feuds with Harvey Wippleman and the Million Dollar Corporation). </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A skit airs involving a marketing meeting at WWF Headquarters, which sees all sorts of dumb ideas being proposed, such as JR pitching black hats, Howard Finkel pitching a video tape of his greatest announcements, Vince McMahon pitching a combination toupee/headset, and superfans Adam and George pitching Wrestlemania 13 denim jackets. That last idea was apparently supposed to be the good one, as Kevin Kelly announces that the jackets are available for $99. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Smilin’ Rocky Maivia comes to the ring to scout his Mania opponent, The Sultan, who is most likely a last-minute replacement for Marc Mero. Sultan wrestles Poughkeepsie’s Mike Bell in an effort to remind viewers who the hell The Sultan is. He hits a Samoan — er, Middle Eastern splash from the top rope and finishes off Bell with the Camel Clutch, a <b>Submission Maneuver</b> (#4). After the match, Rocky pulls “The People’s Belt” away from The Sultan. Rocky offers to fight the Sultan right then and there, but before he can put his foot in his mouth, Tony Atlas hops the rail and separates the two of them.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Due to a tear in the space-time continuum, Raw’s opening theme plays again, accompanied by pyro. The gravely-injured Shawn Michaels strolls down the ramp to a mixed reaction for an interview with Vince McMahon. Michaels opens up with a joke about looking for his smile and another one about how difficult he is to deal with. Vince says that Shawn is a trend-setter, with various superstars and even the President following in Shawn’s footsteps by hurting their knees. These two are just a barrel of laughs tonight! Shawn says that he’ll probably be back in the ring within a few months, pending an evaluation next week, and, more importantly, when he steps in the ring again, his clothes are coming off. The pre-teen girls and middle-aged ladies in the crowd go wild. Shawn says he has an issue with Vince McMahon for not putting him on Wrestlemania (probably because he wussed out of jobbing to Bret Hart), so he is putting himself on the show as a guest commentator for the main event. He also claims to have a lot of “face to spill” in his new home, so he’d like to take home some Slammy Awards.</span></td> <td><br />
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vader, whom Jerry Lawler calls, “The Maxi Vader” (which sounds like a competitor to Always with Wings), faces one half of the tag team champions, The British Bulldog. Perhaps King was referring to the bloody mess that Vader was at the Final Four match. The Slammy Award-winning Owen Hart walks to the ring with his partner, insisting that they hold the European belt together. Vader opens the WCW rematch by pummeling Davey Boy in the corner. The two men then trade shoulder blocks, throwing themselves together faster than the WWF threw together their Wrestlemania match. Bulldog lifts and drops Vader with a vertical suplex.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">As fans at ringside advertise RF Video’s phone number, Vader splashes Bulldog. These two men will team with their respective partners this Sunday at Wrestlemania 13, which is still not sold out. Bulldog catches Vader on a corner splash, body slamming him to the mat. Bulldog attempts to powerslam Vader, but Mankind interferes. The two heels double-team the other heel (Owen) while Bulldog swipes Paul Bearer’s urn to even up the sides.</span></td> <td><br />
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<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrWYw88bqiMeqBadhuUhl0hFcwmWGWGfXNpACT4jkpyNOtdrGRsUiR5qF65KTPxJBQ9ahqS9HZAJwLp56ljgrhCPCDQ4u17yGVxGAkhnKKHJnqokFI5O1I2lXq-yp_cpFODs89R4j6hWY/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-09-26+at+4.52.17+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrWYw88bqiMeqBadhuUhl0hFcwmWGWGfXNpACT4jkpyNOtdrGRsUiR5qF65KTPxJBQ9ahqS9HZAJwLp56ljgrhCPCDQ4u17yGVxGAkhnKKHJnqokFI5O1I2lXq-yp_cpFODs89R4j6hWY/s200/Screen+Shot+2015-09-26+at+4.52.17+PM.png" width="200" /></a></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Louis Farrakhan is nominated for the Best Bow Tie Slammy Award, along with Yokozuna (who is nominated for the time he wore a bow tie at last year’s Slammys), Bob Backlund, Clarence Mason, and Pee Wee Herman. The Nation of Islam leader would be replaced by Steve Urkel come awards night. I guess the WWF wouldn’t want to be controversial by referencing that organization — I mean, except for the near-identical heel faction led by Faarooq that features heavily on all of their programs.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Billy Gunn takes on Aaron Ferguson with Ken Shamrock on commentary. Vince speculates that the submission match that Ken referees could end up being for the WWF title, adding to the pressure on the UFC fighter. Ken says that he’s used to pressure, which Vince finds incredibly funny, chuckling in his Vince McMahon way. Gunn addresses Shamrock from the ring; in two years, he would be mooning Ken’s kayfabe sister. A small “Billy You Suck” breaks out before Gunn applies an arm bar to beat Ferguson. Billy confronts Shamrock at the announce table and challenges him to step into the ring. Vince wants Ken to have no part of it. “He doesn’t have his fighting clothes,” says Vince, ignoring that his adversary is wearing jeans and cowboy boots. Shamrock puts Gunn in an arm bar, prompting Vince to make the first on-air mention of “tapping out.” Shamrock releases the hold, but Gunn wants another go and gets taken down again, this time with the ankle lock, resulting in another tapout. Finally, Billy threatens Shamrock with a chair, then leaves ringside. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Backstage, Stone Cold says that all Ken Shamrock did to get famous was to have some street fights while someone filmed him, using the old Hollywood Blondes movie camera pantomime. Austin says he’ll make sure Bret Hart wins the title tonight so they can wrestle for it at Wrestlemania. The ring crew puts together the jungle-gym cage, requiring the WWF to fill time with, for instance, a Sid promo.<br />
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret Hart starts off the cage match with Sid as the aggressor, stomping the big man in the corner. Bret makes an early attempt to climb the cage, but gets his leg pulled by Sid, who then slams him repeatedly into the cage. Sid tries climbing the cage, but Hart starts a punchout on the top rope before both men eventually return to the mat. Sid tries to crawl through the door, but Stone Cold holds it shut as Raw goes to commercial.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sid powerbombs Bret and attempts to climb out of the cage, but Austin meets him at the top and tries to punch him back into the ring. Hart and Austin double-team Sid until the Undertaker comes to the rescue of his Wrestlemania opponent. Bret superplexes Sid back into the ring and Stone Cold whacks Undertaker with a chair on the arena floor. Bret Hart then tries to walk through the door, but hesitates on the apron, allowing Undertaker to slam the door on him and let Sid climb out to the floor for the victory. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the commercial, Vince McMahon approaches for an interview the terribly frustrated Bret Hart. “Frustrated isn’t the goddamn word for it!” says Bret, shoving McMahon to the mat. “This is bullshit!” says Hart, which goes uncensored. JR immediately apologizes to the viewers. Bret goes on a very angry rant about injustice, being screwed, blind eyes, and various goddamn things. “And if you don’t like it, tough shit!” Jerry Lawler, in a rare role as the voice of reason, tells the production people to cut off Hart’s mic. Stone Cold comes onto the Titantron to cut a promo on the (S)Hitman about being a loser who couldn’t win the title even with Austin’s help. Bret makes an angry pun about Austin’s “stones” being “cold.” Sid comes to the ring again while Bret Hart yells at him that everyone including Sid knows that his belt belongs to Bret. “I don’t know shit!” replies the champion in a classic Sid moment. Well, it makes sense in context. The two argue in the ring until Bret dives through the ropes at The Undertaker, then gets stomped by Steve Austin. The two sets of Wrestlemania opponents brawl separately. Vince returns to the announce table to lament Bret Hart’s growing bitterness and paranoia. Hart punches Pat Patterson, leading Vince to call him a “dirty, rotten son of a—.“ While Hart and Austin punch each other, Sid and The Undertaker choke each other, but you don’t care about that, do you? Amid the chaos, a news ticker assures viewers that La Femme Nikita will air immediately after Raw. Shawn Michaels then walks down the ramp and does nothing, really, except stare at Bret Hart, pick up and drop a pole from the cage, and step into the empty ring with a chair. Next stop, Wrestlemania! Hope it doesn’t suck. (It does)</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally: </span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Maneuvers (Year total: 47)</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">10 My Goodnesses</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-76089172252251803912015-07-13T21:01:00.001-04:002015-09-12T21:50:18.269-04:00Raw #200 - March 10th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The first episode of “Raw is War” (and the 201st episode of Raw, sort of) gets off to a less-than-auspicious start as the in-arena noise is audible during the opening seconds of the intro, allowing the viewers at home to hear Howard Finkel instruct the live crowd to make noise. A new intro sequence plays to the strains of Marilyn Manson’s “The Beautiful People,” used without permission. Thus begins Raw is War, one of the strangest titles for a wrestling program in history. You didn’t see Nitro re-naming itself Nitro is Awesome, now did you? Or Nitro is Ortin? The WWF’s flagship program would retain this self-referential title up to and including the September 10th, 2001 edition.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sid walks under the brand-new Titantron and down the giant entrance ramp to set the tone for the next five or six years of programming by kicking off the show with an in-ring promo. Sid expresses doubt about his tag team partner, The Undertaker’s motives tonight before proclaiming that at Wrestlemania, the Dead Man will become another symbol of Sid’s victories. Sid’s promo is interrupted by The Undertaker’s music as his Wrestlemania opponent makes a slow march to the ring and Sid just stands there like an idiot not saying a word. Get used to this scene repeating with slight variations ten times a night, every Monday night, for years to come. Undertaker refuses to team with Sid tonight, claiming he can beat Mankind and Vader on his own. A very loud, “Ohhhhh yeeeeees!” from Paul Bearer leads to an angry promo by the fat man as he and his two proteges come to the ring. He proceeds to get the name of the show wrong, calling it “War on Raw” while slipping in the tidbit that Vader and Mankind will be challenging for the tag team titles at Mania for some strange reason. The two heels attack Sid and Taker in the ring, but the babyfaces fight back, allowing Sid to break out his patented windmill punches. Undertaker mistakenly believes Sid punched him from behind, leading to a short stand-off.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Raw (is War) returns with a low-angle Andre-shot designed to put over the size not of Rocky Maivia, but of the new Raw set. With all this re-formatting of the show, somehow Vince managed to sneak a squash match onto the show, with Maivia taking on Tony Roy, <a href="http://art0donnell.blogspot.com/2014/01/raw-134-november-6th-1995.html" target="_blank">last seen in a losing effort to Kama in late 1995</a>, whose name is now pronounced “R-wah,” like the hockey player Patrick. Roy is War. Before the match can started, however, incomprehensible speech is heard over the PA, the kind that can only come from the Iron Sheik. At least he has an excuse for being impossible to understand, as he’s speaking Farsi and not English. I think. Regardless, Sheiky Baby does slip in a few words about Rocky Johnson and how the Sultan is going to win the IC title at “Wrestling Mania.” At least I think that’s the Sultan; in the dim lighting, it’s hard to tell whether that’s The Sultan or whether Kevin Nash has returned to the WWF as Super Shredder. Bob Backlund then rants about putting morality back in everyone’s lives while Roy attacks Maivia from behind. “We’re gonna procure — procure, I said, ladies and gentlemen — the championship!” Something tells me The Sultan is a last-minute sub for Marc Mero for WM13. Rocky hits a floatover DDT, a <b>Devastating Maneuver</b> (#1), not letting Backlund’s match-long rant distract him. One stupid pose and a long flying cross-body later, and Maivia picks up the victory. Sultan and company invade the ring, forcing Rocky to defend himself and get out of Dodge before he and the cameraman spot Tony Atlas, his dad’s former tag team partner, in the crowd. Tony Atlas back in the WWF? Something is definitely afoot.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Tonight’s Slam of the Week is sponsored by Cool Boarders for the Playstation, where you can “pull off insane snowboarding maneuvers.” Do you think Vince wrote this ad copy? Ahmed Johnson’s demolition of Leif Cassidy on Shotgun is this week’s highlight. Ahmed puts Cassidy in the Pearl River Plunge, a move Jim Ross says Johnson has in the past performed on a car and on a table. That is, onto a car and onto a table; a tiger driver executed against an automobile would have been Slam of the Decade. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Next is a six-man tag match between the only six luchadors not contracted by WCW. The announcers ignore the action between the hired hands in the ring as they discuss tonight’s debate between Jerry Lawler and Paul Heyman, which JR compares to the debate between JFK and “Tricky Dick Nixon.” However, it sounds like he calls the 37th president, “Turkey-Dick Nixon.” Getting back to the action, Vince notes the<b> Very Quick Maneuvers </b>(#2) used by Latin Lover, et al. Octagon and Pentagon, who look exactly the same, exchange running moves for the benefit of the confused audience. A split-screen interrupts the action as security ejects the “bionic woman,” that is, Chyna, not Jaime Summers.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We learn after the break that the muscular woman has been arrested, I suppose for trespassing, meaning that security in 1997 is far better than it will be in a few years when they crazy chick from Tough Enough 3 cons her way backstage and meets Vince. Brian Pillman shows up on the spilt-screen and says he’ll be on Shotgun Saturday Night. Hector Garza wows the crowd with a spinning dive off the top rope onto his opponents and teammates, but Latin Lover drops the ball by coming up several feet too short on his body-press attempt. While the announcers get their jollies looking at the replay of Garza’s dive, they completely ignore the finish, which sees Latin Lover get pinned. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Ahmed Johnson faces off against the evening’s second jobber, Roy Raymond. “That big Johnson weighs 305 pounds,” says Ross. Just imagine how much the rest of him must weigh! Ross wonders whether the Chicago Street Fight at Mania will be the last match of Ahmed’s career; it won’t be, but it probably should have been. Harlem Heat 2000, anyone? The Nation of Domination interrupts the match by standing on the entrance ramp, just like Sultan and company did in the squash match just a few matches ago. While the NOD’s theme plays, Johnson pins Raymond. Faarooq gets on the mic and calls Ahmed an Uncle Tom. Ahmed calls Faarooq, “charcoal-colored” and brings out the Road Warriors, who enter through the crowd while their music plays. Hawk tells the NOD that by the end of their match, they’ll look like a pile of “raw sweat socks,” which I believe was an old item from the old WWF merchandise catalog. Ahmed accuses the NOD of turning white — not in a racial sense, but from fear.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">JR hassles Owen and Bulldog on their way to the ring about their dissension. Barry Windham of the New Blackjacks tries to stir up trouble between the champions. That’s to mess up their tag team cohesion, you see. Bradshaw then says Owen has “some real purdy lips.” I don’t know what that’s for. Owen doesn’t take too kindly to the implied threat of anal rape, brawling with Bradshaw. Vader cuts a promo on the split-screen about “The Pain Game” he and his partner will win at Wrestlemania. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The nondescript brawling continues after the break. Vince announces that Bret Hart will get a title rematch against Sid next week, just six days before Wrestlemania 13. Tazz threatens Jerry Lawler via the split-screen before former WWF referee Bill Alfonso blows his whistle. As soon as Tazz walks away, the 6’ Lawler makes a series of short jokes about the 5’9” Human Suplex Machine. Owen has Bradshaw locked in the Sharpshooter as the referee is distracted by the chaos in the ring caused by the two illegal men. Windham clotheslines Owen before the referee rings the bell and awards the match to the Blackjacks for reasons the announcers can’t understand. In fact, Bulldog shoved the referee, but none of the three commentators were paying close enough attention to catch that. A commercial for the Slammys airs, urging fans to vote for the Loose Screw award, a category that includes Cosmo Kramer. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Taz confronts Lawler at ringside, grabbing him by the jacket, before Sabu leaps out of the ring and through a table. to the uninitiated, it would appear Sabu was trying to hit the ECW-hating Lawler rather than his mortal enemy Taz. A swarm of ECW wrestlers, including former Bodydonna Chris Candido, separate Taz and Sabu. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Leif Cassidy takes on Miguel Perez, Jr. who is Puerto Rican, as evidenced by his music and the flags on his tights. Jerry Lawler accuses the Caribbean’s answer to Chewbacca of being jealous of Savio Vega’s success. Two crappy kip-ups and a miscue later, and the fans greet Perez with apathy. Paul E. gets on the split-screen and gets real, referring to himself as Paul Heyman while ranting against Lawler. Miguel Perez counters a powerbomb for the night’s third <b>Maneuver </b>before pinning Leif with a victory to cap off one of the most lackluster debuts since Avatar, who bombed so badly he had to be repackaged as Leif Cassidy. Backstage, when asked for his reaction to the newly-announced title match next week, Sid screams, “I don’t react, Vince McMahon! I react with the action!”</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Marilyn Manson intro plays again to mark the 9 o’clock hour. Jim Ross is in the ring with Ken Shamrock, who will referee the Austin-Hart submission match, which, pending the outcome of next week’s Hart-Sid match, could be for the WWF title. “Shut yer hole, Shamrock!” says Stone Cold on the as-yet-unnamed Titantron. Austin doesn’t understand how Bret is getting so many title shots, but he hopes Hart wins next week so that Stone Cold can win the title at Wrestlemania. Austin and Shamrock exchange threats before Bret Hart enters in flannel to his theme music. Bret complains about the lack of justice in the WWF and admits to screaming and crying at Gorilla Monsoon until he got a steel cage match with Sid. Most fans boo the prospect of The Hitman winning the title, and that’s before he rattles off the list of people by whom he has been screwed. Hart says he likes Shamrock but he better not screw with Bret at Wrestlemania. Shamrock says he’s not a marriage counselor who’s hear to listen to his problems. If he were a marriage counselor, he’d probably have a word with Bret about his many extramarital affairs. Steve Austin walks through the curtain for two seconds before walking right back as the show cuts to commercial.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Honky Tonk Man comes to the ring as Aldo Montoya waits around. Honky refuses to sing for the crowd, drawing cheers from the Worcester fans. Billy Gunn, who hasn’t been seen since he got his neck fake-injured against his fake-brother, comes to the ring for his comeback match. Honky Tonk says that the he has narrowed the list for his next protege down to about three candidates. Honky hits on some topical references to Dolly the sheep by saying that he himself should be cloned, forgetting about Greg Valentine from their old tag team. Honky Tonk repeatedly mentions that McMahon is in the running to be the next Honky Tonk Man based on his dance skills, leading to chuckles from Vince. In a further excuse to ignore a Billy Gunn-Aldo Montoya match, Sunny talks about her new segment on Shotgun, “Undercover with Sunny,” suggesting that Billy would like to get under cover with Sunny. I remind you that Billy Gunn is married and that his wife was on hand during his last match, so the former Smoking Gunns shouldn’t be sleeping with Sunny. Anymore. Speaking of Sunny, Vince remarks, “Billy Gunn has polished off Aldo Montoya” after pinning the Portuguese Man-O-War. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Goldust is up next to take on Massachusetts’s own Tim McNeany. Shortly into the match, Hunter appears on the stage (with lighting reminiscent of his entrances for years to come) along with the mystery woman. Jim Ross speculates that there could be two of that woman, since she had seemingly been arrested and escorted from the building earlier in the night. Imagine two Chynas: one could stay out of the spotlight and be the “before” picture in the plastic surgery photos. Goldust pins McNeany after a Curtain Call, and Chyna steps onto the apron. With Goldut distracted, Hunter clotheslines him from behind off the top rope/ It’s rare for HHH to jump off the top rope, and even rarer for someone to do it while wearing a suit. Marlena jumps onto Chyna’s back and has to be pulled off by officials. Chyna pushes through the suits to get to Marlena, who lands a punch on the Amazon. The mystery woman press-slams Harvey Wippleman onto two other referees before order can be restored. Who would have thought that Harvey would win the women’s title before her? Paul E. walks by Tommy Dreamer, Beulah, Sandman, and the Dudley Boyz backstage on his way to the “great debate” with Jerry Lawler.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jim Ross hosts the debate in the middle of the ring while Jerry Lawler and Paul E. stand by a giant WWF podium. Sadly, this would not be a mainstay of Raw is War like the Titantron. Tonight’s debate question is “Should ECW exist?” As Lawler gives his opening statement, ECW wrestlers line the outside of the ring. The King goes over the 90-second time limit, and Dangerously lays into Lawler about the ECW guys busting their (collective) ass. Lawler says that the same number of people in Philadelphia who go to an ECW show would also watch paint dry. Paul E. says that as long as they’re shooting, “How ya doin’ at the see-saws in Louisville?” He also brings up the fact that his sons don’t call themselves, “Lawler.” Jerry plays the gay card and says that Heyman hangs around with all these guys because he’s “light in the loafers.” Tommy Dreamer challenges Lawler to bring his friends to the ring so they can have a war. Lawler calls on his buddies, but no one shows up. Realizing it’s past all his closest acquaintances’ bedtimes, Lawler steps out of the ring.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mankind and Vader, who are inexplicably getting tag team title shots (except for the fact that Bulldog was supposed to wrestle Austin instead of defending the tag titles at Mania), team up to take on Sid and the Undertaker, who are scheduled to main-event Wrestlemania in 2 weeks. Vader and Mankind attack Sid before the bell before The Undertaker can arrive. Taker finally shows up with no entrance music to take out Vader with a chokeslam and a big boot before Mankind clotheslines the Dead Man and himself over the top rope. The Masters of the Power Bomb are left in the ring as the legal men while Undertaker, the only man in the match not best known for his WCW stint, waits in his corner. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the final commercial break, Vince informs us that the USA Network has granted the WWF more air time for the finish of this match. Sid gets the hot tag to Undertaker, who chokeslam on Mankind. As Sid and Vader brawl on the outside, Undertaker jumps off the apron onto Vader, but inadvertently hits Sid, as well. The two get into an argument in the ring and Taker chokeslams his partner, then dives over the top rope onto Vader and Mankind. Undertaker beats up Mankind on the ramp, but Sid throws him back into the ring for a powerbomb. Vader covers Taker for the victory. Sid then pie-faces Vader, which is not as delicious as the 450-pounder would have liked. </span><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Backstage, Bret Hart says that next week, we’ll find out who is the king, and it won’t be a giraffe, referring to Sid. Harsh. He gets a title shot next week.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final Tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3 Maneuvers (Year total: 43)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-75013110619442775842015-06-02T17:19:00.001-04:002015-07-28T16:02:23.000-04:00Raw #199 - March 3rd, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
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</td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince McMahon recounts the division of Berlin in tonight’s cold opening. Trying to play up the historical significance of tonight’s Raw (number 200, by the way, although the Network doesn't count Thursday Raw Thursday), he says that, as the eyes of the world were on Berlin during the fall of the Berlin Wall, so too will the eyes of the world be on Berlin tonight for the pre-taped episode of Raw. The difference, of course, is that significantly fewer eyes will be watching tonight’s episode than were watching the re-unification of East and West Berlin. Hell, significantly fewer eyes will be watching tonight’s episode than were watching last week’s episode. Tonight concludes the European title tournament, which has played out on the house shows in Germany for the past week or so. Tag team partners Owen Hart and Davey Boy Smith wrestle for the coveted new title that was just announced two weeks ago and whose significance and purpose have still yet to be explained.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Honky Tonk Man comes to ringside for commentary, introduced in German by the ring announcer. “Guten Abend, Honky Tonk,” says McMahon. Hunter Hearst Helmsley is set to face off against Bret Hart. A female fan gives a “yucky” face to Triple H. Backstage, Bret Hart says Hunter will be “sore-y” he ever messed with the Hitman. After Hart gets a big ovation from the German fans, McMahon says he is “beloved by so many individuals.” On the other hand, JR compares Bret Hart to Rodney Dangerfield in terms of the lack of respect they receive, thanks to Stone Cold, who will join the taped show live from WWF Studios. Hunter punts Bret Hart teddy bears out of the ring to the crowd’s dismay. Vince points out that everything Bret Hart does gets cheered by the Germans, and he’s not kidding: they even cheer his headlock takeovers and escapes from head scissors. They decidedly do not cheer when Triple H catches him with a knee to the gut before the commercial break.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Triple H bows to the crowd with Bret Hart’s arm in a key lock before falling backward to the mat. Hart later turns the match around with a superplex, then starts on his Five Moves of Doom, hitting a leg sweep, backbreaker, and elbow smash, before mixing it up with a vertical suplex. I have still yet to see the Five Moves done in sequence after more than four years of Raws. Hart slingshots Hunter into the corner, then attempts a Sharpshooter but gets his face raked. Hart sets up Helmsley in the tree of woe, then shoves Earl Hebner clear across the ring, drawing a disqualification. Chyna, whom Vince calls “that bionic-type-looking woman,” steps into the ring, looking much smaller in comparison to Bret Hart then she does to Marlena. Bret declines to engage her physically, and a number of officials take the woman away. She walks backstage with Triple H, as if the fact that she crossed a continent to confront Hunter’s opponent wasn’t proof enough that she is aligned with the Blue Blood. Back in the WWF studios, Austin is nowhere to be seen, but the sound of a toilet flushing delights the kids watching who are too young to know how to read a TV Guide and figure out that Nitro is also on right now. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vader comes through the entrance way with Paul Bearer to take on Rocky Maivia, the Intercontinental champion who has already earned more titles in the WWF than Vader would in his entire Federation career. Honky Tonk Man takes exception to the rookie being IC champion. Vader actually defeated Rocky earlier in the tour in a non-title match in the European title tournament. Vader dominates the early-going of the match, scoring a series of two-counts, until Rocky suplexes Vader in an <b>Unbelievable Maneuver</b> (#1). </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vader hits a splash from the second rope after the commercial, but Rocky kicks out. Vader picks Rocky’s leg until he reaches the ropes, then leaps at Maivia from the second rope. Rocky turns this into a powerslam for a <b>Maneuver </b>(#2), but only scores a two-count. A belly-to-belly likewise scores a near-fall. After hitting a floatover DDT, Rocky wastes some time doing a stupid pose, then hits a flying body press on the big man. Vader rolls away from a pin attempt, rather than rolling through the body press for the pin, as he did in their last match when Rocky hit a <b>Similar Maneuver </b>(#3). The two brawl outside of the ring until Mankind (who teams with Vader at Wrestlemania) hits Rocky with the urn, drawing a disqualification to Vader’s frustration. The big man takes out his anger on Rocky after the bell. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We watch a replay of last week’s ECW invasion. Well, technically, I watch the replay; you just read about it. It highlights Jerry’s and Paul E’s bickering, though, on an amusing note, the Sandman’s beer-drinking gets pixelated, while neither Jerry Lawler's forcing of Aldo Montoya and Jake Roberts to drink liquor last year, nor Steve Austin’s beer bashes in 1998, ever get the same treatment.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Sultan, who has not been seen on Raw for months but who will nonetheless end up getting an Intercontinental title shot at Mania in three weeks, comes to the ring to face Flash Funk. Jerry Lawler calls up to complain some more about ECW as ECW alum Too Cold Scorpio makes his way to the ring. Lawler teases another confrontation with Paul E on next week’s Raw before Vince promises to return to Raw with “a whale of a match.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Dok Hendrix voices over a commercial for next week’s episode of “Raw is War,” the show’s new format. And what better way to reflect Raw’s new, edgier format than by hosting it in an arena named for vitamins? Honky Tonk Man smiles about how much he likes the frauleins here in Germany. “They want to see the Honky Tonk Man shake, rattle, and roll,” says Honky. “I know that’s right!” says Vince. Fun fact: the real Elvis never toured internationally, as his manager Col. Parker was an illegal Dutch immigrant with no U.S. passport. Paul E Dangerously calls Vince up to vaguely accept Lawler’s challenge for a clash with ECW sometime in the future before plugging ECW’s pay-per-view. Meanwhile, in the ring, The Sultan counters Flash Funk’s flying head scissors with a <b>Maneuver</b> (#4 - reverse powerbomb).</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We (or, more accurately, I) see a lengthy replay of what happened the last time Steve Austin was in the WWF studios, all hyping up Austin’s sit-down interview in an empty studio. Meanwhile, Vince mentions that Mankind, ‘a most unusual athlete,” gave a “most unusual interview” earlier today where he spoke German. We don’t get to see this interview, though, just hear about it. Sid, Mankind’s opponent tonight, cuts a promo about how Mankind shouldn’t have spent so much time brushing up on his German and more time getting ready for his match. Tonight, says Sid, Mankind will become a symbol of one of his many victories on his way to Wrestlemania. He even repeats the idea that Mankind will become a symbol of his victories, in case we didn’t understand it the first time (and I still don’t understand it the second time). </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Ahmed Johnson comes to the ring for a bilingual interview. Jim Ross wonders whether Ahmed will accept Faarooq’s challenge to a Chicago Street fight, where the participants come to the fight dressed as they are. Given that Ahmed ends up wearing the same bikini briefs to the ring that he always does, you’ve got to wonder about Johnson’s fashion sense. The German announcer asks the questions in his native language first, the translates into English for Ahmed. Johnson, whose English is far less intelligible than the German announcer’s, says he’s not going to come alone to the street fight at Wrestlemania. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Road Warriors’ return last week gets recapped at length, the third such replay package this episode. On Shotgun, the LOD called out the NOD and said they hoped to be at Wrestlemania in Chicago. Hmmm… and Ahmed says he’s not coming to the street fight alone. I wonder what will happen? </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mankind, who left his ear in Munich in 1994, comes to the ring for his title shot. We finally see the German interview Mankind gave. “Ich bin Mankind!” he says, which, as any educated person knows, actually means, “I am a jelly donut.” </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After a commercial, we get another set of replays, this time from tonight’s episode itself. Vince notes that the European title is the first new championship in the WWF in over twenty years, forgetting that the IC title was created in 1979, and its precursor, the North American title, debuted in 1978. Moreover, there were the Women’s Tag Team Titles (est. 1983) and the Canadian Championship (est. 1985). Steve Austin interrupts the match on the split screen, complaining about his flight to Stamford and Bret Hart.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Sid and Mankind brawl on the outside until Sid returns to the ring, only to get a stunner across the top rope from Mankind. Vince takes the opportunity to point out that the WWF superstars are not past their prime before Mankind hits a <b>Maneuver </b>(#5 - leg drop) from the top rope and gets a two-count. Jim Ross tells us to call the WWF Superstar Line for news on Ken Shamrock and Sable. Mankind subdues Sid with the mandible claw, drawing comparisons from JR to Sam Sheppard, the former wrestler, doctor, once-convicted murderer, and inspiration for the Fugitive TV show. Sid stands up while in the hold, looking like a fish with a hook in his mouth, then pulls Mankind’s fingers out of his mouth. Vince notes that should Mankind win the title tonight, it will be Mankind vs. Undertaker (for the sixth time) at Wrestlemania 13. Paul Bearer steps onto the apron, where he is accosted by Sid, then knocked to the floor accidentally by Mankind. Sid hits a chokeslam for a two-count, then a powerbomb for the victory. Backstage, The British Bulldog (who on Superstars nine days earlier fired Clarence Mason as his manager) and Owen hart prepare for their European title match. As Raw goes to break, Stone Cold is seen looking none too pleased in the WWF studios as Vince plugs La Femme Nikita. “What’s the matter?” says Vince, unamused.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince brings up the many times as of late that Stone Cold has attempted, once successfully, to cost Bret Hart the WWF title, including in his title match against Sycho Sid, where Austin hits Bret with a chair while the Hitman had Sid locked in his <b>Patented Maneuver</b> (#6 - sharpshooter). Steve has no remorse for his actions, and says he has been “screwed” more than Bret, having competed in the Final Four match sick and with an injured knee and got no sympathy, but when Shawn Michaels wrestles sick, the announcers point it out, and when he injures his knee, he gets a video tribute. How many one-legged people could take on three of the world’s top wrestlers, asks Austin, before uncharacteristically clarifying that he’s not trying to make fun of one-legged people. Austin’s level of political-incorrectness has just reached new lows; he should have said, “persons with one leg.” Geez, Steve, use person-first language! Stone Cold — excuse me, the person with stone-coldness — guarantees that he’s not going to quit in his submission match with Bret Hart.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince suggests that “the fur is gonna fly” in tonight’s main event between Owen and Bulldog. I don’t think I want to know to what fur McMahon is referring. In a long-winded sentence featuring the words, “individuals,” “athleticism,” and “I would suggest,” Vince notes that these two men are athletes in their prime, not “Team Over 40.” By the way, the men they defeated to advance to the finals were Bret Hart (39) and Vader (41), respectively. Vince also plays up the tension between the two tag team champions. British Bulldog escapes a wrist lock with some <b>Very Fancy Maneuvers </b>(#7) , reverses the hold, then falls prey to it again, leading to some more <b>Fancy Maneuvers </b>(#8). Bulldog regains the upper hand by spinning on his back like a turtle, if turtles spun on their shells, which they don’t. Bulldog locks Owen in a test of strength, which Owen escapes High Energy-style by jumping onto the top rope and springing off it for a backflip. “How about that <b>Maneuver</b>” (#9), says Vince. Bulldog counters a huracanrana attempt with a powerbomb, then slingshots Owen over the top rope before holding the ropes open for his opponent and partner. Vince notes how well these two men know each other’s <b>Maneuvers </b>(#10).</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the commercial, Bulldog has Owen in yet another wristlock, with which he lifts his opponent off his feet and slams him onto the mat. McMahon assures us that we “are not watching the classic sports channel,” which is either a dig at the ages of the WCW wrestlers or an honest clarification for those fans tuning in who might be confused by the poor video quality into thinking this Raw was filmed decades earlier. As Bulldog sets up Hart for a surfboard, Vince wonders whether he will be able to apply the Submission Maneuver (#11). Owen escapes by grabbing the referee, then dumps Smith over the top rope and celebrates with a Bulldog-style front flip. It’s now Honky Tonk Man’s turn to rag on WCW. Everyone wants to be part of the WWF, says the recently-returned 44-year-old wrestler, and it’s not “the over-40 crowd.” Owen feigns a knee injury, allowing him to hit a cheap shot on his brother-in-law. Bulldog powers out of a sharpshooter attempt, prompting JR to praise Davey Boy’s lower-body strength and lack of artificial hips. He’s referring to Roddy Piper’s artificial hip, which he wrestled with at the previous year’s Wrestlemania. After a brief shoving match, Owen hits a spinning heel kick, which Vince describes as devastating. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">In the last segment of the night, Bulldog lifts Owen up on his shoulders and drops him backwards rather dangerously. Owen rebounds (not literally) to pin Smith, using the ropes for leverage, but Bulldog kicks out at two. Hart sets Davey Boy up for a superplex, the <b>Maneuver</b> (#12) that Vince speculates will finish off Smith. Instead, Bulldog counters with a body press in mid air for a two-count. Smith whips Owen sternum-first into the turnbuckles, presses Hart over his head, then dumps him crotch-first onto the top rope. Owen Hart reverses a powerslam attempt with a <b>Maneuver</b> (#13), grabbing onto the ropes and falling on top of the British Bulldog for a two-count. After an enziguiri kick, Owen slaps on the Sharpshooter, which Bulldog escapes by grabbing the bottom rope. Soon after, Bulldog hits the running powerslam, but Owen kicks out, then uses the victory roll. However, Bulldog rolls backward onto Owen to kick out and scores a three-count to win the new title. Bulldog and Owen shake hands and Raw ends before Owen cuts a smarmy heel promo for the crowd. Next week, Raw is war, but this week, it was the lowest-rated episode ever. Well, tied for lowest. There was another 1.9-rated show on <a href="http://art0donnell.blogspot.com/2013/12/raw-128-september-25th-1995.html" target="_blank">September 25th, 1995</a>, which was headlined by Bulldog vs. Undertaker, followed by two commercial breaks.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">12 Maneuvers (Year total: 40)</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />
</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-6633731064895023022015-05-19T17:00:00.000-04:002015-07-28T16:01:48.311-04:00Raw #198: February 24th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Despite featuring an ECW “invasion,” this episode of Raw is more of a throwback to the first Raws of 1993. Not only does it take place in the Manhattan Center, but, like those early Raws, it doesn’t feature many of the top stars of the company, who, in this case, are touring Germany. That might explain why tonight is heavily packed with outside wrestlers best known from other wrestling organizations, much like the first Monday night edition of TNA Impact years later. Jerry Lawler calls tonight’s program as the blackest day in WWF history, referring either to the influx of ECW wrestlers or the many African-American fans sitting directly behind him. ECW, Vince explains, stands for “Extreme, ladies and gentleman,” killing off the company’s cool factor much earlier than the 2006 re-launch on Sci-Fi.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Making their Raw debut are the New Blackjacks, made up of Barry Windham and Bradshaw, both now sporting jet-black hair and mustaches. As the cowboy tag team rushes in to battle the hillbillies, the letters, “ECW” are visible from the balcony. Early on in the match, Phineas Godwinn executes a head scissors in the corner, pulling Windham onto the ropes, where he struggles comically to fall to the outside of the ring. Meanwhile, Vince promises a “great big surprise” later tonight, as well as an arm-wrestling match between Marlena and Sunny. In the front row, a fan holds up the first “Die Rocky” sign, a placard of comparable historical significance to the first “Austin 3:16” shirt spotted on television way back at In Your House, eight days prior (and seven months after Stone Cold coined the phrase). Ken Shamrock of the UFC is picked out in the crowd, with whom Jerry Lawler claims to be old friends. “ABC Network said Ken Shamrock was ‘The World’s Most Dangerous Man,’ says Lawler, “so it’s just natural he and I would hang out together.” Lawler may be referring to those posters of him hanging up in middle schools across Memphis. Bradshaw delivers a clothesline to Phineas, a <b>Devastating Maneuver</b> (#1), allowing Windham (whose hair loss is now pretty obvious now that he’s no longer blonde) to pin the hillbilly. Phineas manages to get his foot on the rope, but the referee does not see it, resulting in a win for the New Blackjacks. As Bradshaw and Freddie Mercury celebrate, The Godwinns argue with and slop the referee, leading Mike Chioda to flop around on the pretty blue mats that line the outside of the ring. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The announcers plug the upcoming Sugar Ray Leonard- Hector Camacho fight on pay-per-view before The Eliminators hop the railing and deliver Total Elimination to a ring attendant. The Eliminators consist of Perry Saturn (best known as one of The Radicalz who would jump from WCW to the WWF) and John Kronus (best known as Perry Saturn’s tag team partner). Paul E gets on the mic and says King’s challenge has been accepted before an ECW chant breaks out. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Paul Heyman, who is holding a flip-phone instead of his standard earl-90s brick-phone, introduces Little Guido (later known in WWE as Nunzio) of the Full-Blooded Italians (a faction later joined by Freddie Joe Floyd). The bWo, consisting of Stevie Richards, The Blue Meanie, Nova (who wrestled as Mike Bucci on early Raws and would later wrestle as Simon Dean in WWE), and 7-11 (co-founder of Ring of Honor and star of a Perverted Justice sting operation, Rob Feinstein), then arrive. Upon seeing Meanie imitate Scott Hall’s Razor pose, Lawler suggests they change their name to the BO. “Well, they may have some of that, too,” says McMahon. Paul Heyman joins the announce table, marking the only time he and Jerry Lawler would commentate together. “Yeah, Paul E!” says a fan in the front row, grabbing Heyman’s shoulder. Big Stevie Cool tells Jerry Lawler, “We’re taking over,” eliciting a hardy chuckle from Vince McMahon. Maybe Vinnie Mac thinks he can re-package Richards as the third Razor Ramon. Lawler calls the bWo a “rip-off,” getting another laugh from Vince, who says the men in blue have nothing to do with the “clothing line” known as nWo. This may mark the only time in the history of business that a company's selling loads of merchandise is used as an insult by the competition. Raven (who not only would later wrestle for both WCW and WWF, but was a mainstay of Raw in 1993 and 1994 as Johnny Polo, even beating Marty Jannetty in a match) appears in the aisle way, marking the first of many times that an ECW World Champion would appear on a Monday night wrestling show. Distracted, Stevie gets rolled up by Guido for a two-count, gets dropkicked, then gets erroneously labeled by Vince as “Stevie Ray” (one half of Harlem Heat who would later wrestle in the WWF as… oh, sorry. Force of habit. Lash Huffman wouldn’t do much of anything). Paul E offers Vince an announcing job at ECW, which would have made for some classic television. Goldust appears in an inset interview but doesn’t say much before “technical difficulties” prevent him from answering Vince’s question about his opponent for tonight, Savio Vega. Vince doesn’t ask him anything about Meanie, the once and future Blue Dust, who stands at ringside). Paul E admits admits in so many words that he’d be willing to have sex with Goldust so long as it was a three-way with Marlena. Goldust returns to the screen but doesn’t address Paul E’s offer. Instead, he says that tonight he’ll protect Marlena from the man/woman who attacked her last week. Jerry Lawler points out the hypocrisy of Goldust questioning another person’s gender. Big Stevie Cool jackknifes Guido, then Stevie-kicks him for the victory. So is he supposed to be Kevin Nash or Shawn Michaels? “Stevie Cool has never lost his smile,” says Paul. Sunny even appears backstage and physically demonstrates Michaels’s anatomical shortcomings. Or maybe it’s something having to do with her arm-wrestling match with Marlena. Vince repeats the same line about the nWo, in case anyone missed it the first time. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Honky Tonk Man, the most extreme Elvis impersonator, arrives to Jerry Lawler’s delight to referee the arm-wrestling match. Sunny arrives to big cheers from the ECW fans, who must really appreciate the managerial skills of one Tammy Sytch. To get heat, Sunny revives her old Bodydonnas routine by calling them fat and out of shape, but she still gets cheered when she takes off her robe. Jerry Lawler squeals at what Vince calls Sunny’s “bumpin’ and a-grindin.’” Next out is Marlena, who Vince says has had some problems with “another lady. We’re not talking about Sunny, and actually, we’re not talking about a lady, either.” Well, that rules out the classy Sable, then! Of course, Vince is referring to the woman soon to be known as Chyna. Sunny offers to let Marlena forfeit the match due to injury. “Come on, Sunny, get up on the table!” shouts Honky. Marlena grabs the mic and implies that Sunny is a street-corner hooker, then refuses to forfeit. Sunny keeps pulling away right before the competition can start, so Marlena does the same thing in retaliation and gets threatened with disqualification. Ken Shamrock looks on. You know, it’s odd that Shamrock would be in the crowd for this particular Raw, since ECW has historically only worked with MMA fighters willing to job in exchange for broken promises of oral sex from Missy Hyatt. Take that, Paul Varelans! The match finally gets underway, and Honky Tonk cheers for Sunny to win. “Pull Sunny! Pull hard!” At least I think that’s what he’s doing. Just before Marlena can win, Sunny throws powder in her eyes. One fan is heard clearly yelling, “B***h! You f**king b***h! You f**king b***h!” This was uncensored as it aired, but thanks to my crafty use of asterisks, you now have no idea what that fan was screaming, right? Savio Vega then steps in the ring and grabs Marlena’s hair, but Goldust follows after him and beats him up, leading to the first non-Sunny-related “Oh My Goodness” from Vince tonight (making it the fourth instance overall). Goldy slams Vega into the arm-wrestling table before Raw goes to commercial.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Savio is in control, and the Nation of Domination is at ringside. Jerry Lawler is relieved to finally have some WWF guys out here. King, who is fed up with having to watch tiny, untalented nobodies from minor leagues dominated by has-beens, is glad to see PG-13 from the USWA, where Lawler himself is champion. A “Candido” chant is directed at Sunny, who is still at ringside, though it sounds more like, “Candy dough.” Miguel Perez of Puerto Rico is on commentary to express his disapproval of Savio Vega. Perez joins Vince and Jerry, who in a heel promo <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RyHc7y-7YhU">once said everyone ought to own one or two Puerto Ricans</a><span id="goog_300314866"></span><span id="goog_300314867"></span>. “Would you want to say something in Spanish to your countrymen who are watching,” asks Vince. En español, he thanks the Puerto Rican people for all the support they had given to Savio in the past, and that he’s going to fix what’s going on with Vega. The question on everyone’s mind, of course, is, “Who is Miguel Perez?” No, Who is Jim Neidhart. Crush delivers a patented crappy piledriver to Goldust on the outside of the ring, eliciting another “Oh My Goodness” from Vince. McMahon reminds us of the “huge surprise” still to come tonight. Savio crotches Goldust on the top turnbuckle for a <b>Maneuver </b>(#2), but the Bizarre One fights off a superplex attempt, then, for the second time in Raw history, kisses Savio Vega before pushing him off the ropes. Goldust jumps off the ropes, catches Savio’s foot, but gets tripped by Crush while running the ropes. Goldy hits Crush to the approval of Faith No More Guy. Cursh soon enters the ring to double-team Goldust, drawing a DQ. Miguel Perez, who the fans have no idea who he is (Uh, how can I phrase that grammatically? “About whose identity the fans have no idea”?), delivers a dropkick to his future Boricuas tag team partner. The rest of the Nation members salute with their backs to the ring, oblivious to what’s going on in the ring. Vince plugs next week’s Raw from Berlin, the lowest-rated Raw ever. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We see a clip from Jerry Lawler’s 1993 interview with the late Tiny Tim, who is wearing some Mickey Mouse jacket (literally). Jerry Lawler interviews Ken Shamrock, taking credit for training the World’s Most Dangerous Man. Ken, </span><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">looking like he he’s been caught in some kind of Candid Camera prank,</span> then says he doesn’t know Jerry. Ken calls Jerry a liar, and Lawler looks shocked, as if he never expected this might happen. “Looking that egg dripping all over his face,” says Vince. He’s speaking metaphorically, of course. Jerry’s taste in girls ensures that he never has to worry about eggs. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Paul Heyman gets on the mic again, saying, “Man, has this show sucked without ECW or what, huh?” When Heyman is nominated for the “Freedom Speech” Slammy award, this sound bite would be replayed, but with the word, “sucked” bleeped out. Mikey Whipwreck takes on future WWE commentator Taz, accompanied by former WWF referee Bill Alfonso. Taz is the second ECW wrestler named for a cartoon character to appear on tonight’s show, after The Blue Meanie. Paul Heyman and Jerry Lawler argue, with Lawler claiming that at ECW shows, they set the fans on fire, and with Heyman plugging the April 13th pay-per-view as much as possible. He also calls all of Taz’s suplexes without using the word, “maneuver.” The fans all at once stand up and look over towards the aisle, where Sabu stands on the giant red “R.” Since it’s a flimsy prop, Sabu basically falls off it when he tries to jump, but manages to land on a number of Team Taz members to break his fall. Taz gives Whipwreck an overhead belly-to-belly, nudging him over the ropes and onto Sabu when he gets stuck. Tazz wins with the katahajime over “Mickey Whipwreck.” Paul E corrects Vince and tells him, “You need to watch the tapes that Bruce Prichard leaves on your desk.” </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Headbangers arrive to little reaction as Vince awaits the arrival of the “big surprise.” That surprise is the Road Warriors, prompting the second chant of initials on tonight’s show, in this case, “LOD.” The Headbangers “don’t know what quite to make” of Animal and Hawk, says Vince, meaning “quite what.” After chants of “Bischoff sucks!”, Vince praises the WWF’s lack of censorship of the fans, an ECW-like quality that Jerry Lawler objects to. Vince dismisses Lawler’s claim to have taught Ken Shamrock <b>Submission Maneuvers</b> (#3), while Lawler says Vince doesn’t know anything about the music the Headbangers listen to, such as The Butthole Surfers. “I beg your pardon?” says Vince. After getting dominated early on, the Headbangers take control as the match, which should have ended five minutes ago, gets interrupted by commercials. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">During the break, the Headbangers pulled off the leap-frog double-team that the Beverly Brothers used to do. Hawk takes both Headbangers down with a double-clothesline and tags in Animal. Both teams brawl on the outside, resulting in a double countout. The WWF sure knows how to debut returning talent, huh? The Road Warriors hit Mosh with the Doomsday Device, then motion for the title belts, which is an odd thing to do after failing to beat the Headbangers. Vince updates fans on the Shawn Michaels situation, saying that he may be able to avoid surgery, probably unlike Marc Mero. Rather than explaining what he means about Mero, he takes us to another Shawn retirement package set to the sappy, “Tell Me a Lie.” This is extreme!</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">D-Von Dudley, along with Sign Guy Dudley, awaits the challenge of Tommy Dreamer, who arrives with Beulah to the strains of “Man in the Box” - the real version, not the “Jimmy Hart Version”. Paul E says Tommy is headed to pay-per-view, though it would turn out he wouldn’t actually wrestle on it. Lawler complains about how much publicity the pay-per-view is getting; you’d think Jerry would be up for any PPV special called, “Barely Legal.” Tommy uses the blue WWF stairs to baseball-slide D-Von, but later gets whipped into into them by Dudley. Lawler rails against the “crap” he is seeing in the ring, which is rather rich considering that his own territory is famous for its gimmick matches, and considering that Lawler has wrestled comedians and referees in Memphis. D-Von pulls Beulah in front of him as a human shield, but McGillicutty gives him a mule kick to the groin. Tommy Dreamer DDTs D-Von for the victory, but Buh Buh Ray Dudley attacks him from behind; only Paul E is paying attention. Dreamer takes the Dudley Death Drop before The Sandman, with whom King once feuded when he was still a surfer, shows up to even the sides. Paul E exits the announce table and praises Vince’s “cajones” before getting into a fight with Jerry Lawler, who is standing on the table. ECW wrestlers intervene as the show goes to break. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince declares that next week’s Raw will be the biggest thing in Germany since the fall of the Berlin Wall before handing it off to Jim Ross and Jim Cornette to recap last week’s title match. We even see a “Superstars Exclusive” of Bret Hart backstage after losing the title, which is no longer a Superstars exclusive, since this is Monday Night Raw and not Superstars. Vince claims that Sid and Undertaker’s snoozer at Wrestlemania will “set new standards for intensity.” It will take place, he says, at the Rosemont Horizon in Chicago, “notwithstanding” Bret Hart’s match with Steve Austin. Vince still doesn’t know how to use that word. At this point, the match is billed as “no holds barred,” but not “I Quit.” </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Ken Shamrock appears for the fourth or fifth time, this time for an interview with Todd Pettengill. Todd lets Ken’s wife and father speak, then asks Ken his picks for Wrestlemania. In the main event, he picks The Undertaker. Todd then asks him about the “submission match” between Austin and Hart, since submissions are Shamrock’s specialty. Did the stipulation change for the match in the past two minutes? Bret and Stone Cold, who are probably asleep in Germany right now, don’t yet know anything about the submission stip. Ken refuses to make a pick because it’s going to be too close. Faarooq gets in Ken’s face, and Ken says Faarooq surrounds himself with people because he can’t fight on his own. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Undertaker, the only wrestler here tonight from episode #1, enters to take on Faarooq. Jerry Lawler gets the camera man to show a sign held up by who he calls “the only intelligent person in New York.” The sign says “Extreme Chicken Wimps” and was made by three twelve-year-old boys. Undertaker roughs up D’Lo at the outset of the match, then hits School on Faarooq. Lawler still insists that he taught Ken Shamrock “how to choke guys out.” “Let’s not get into… choking, things of that nature,” says the most extreme and ultimate commentator in the WWF, Vince McMahon. D’Lo gets his revenge on Taker by chopping his leg out from under him and stomping him outside the ring as Raw goes to break.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Faarooq telegraphs a back body drop from about ten feet away, allowing the Undertaker to hit a leg drop to the back of his head for an Unbelievable Maneuver (#4). Fans chant “You still suck” at ECW alum Ron Simmons. At least the Manhattan Center crowd isn’t telling him to shine their shoes, like they did to Mr. Hughes. Speaking of noteworthy chants, the crowd later chants, “We are the Nation of Masturbation!” If this were a modern-day Raw crowd, at this point they would start chanting something lame like, “We are awesome,” which, ironically, means essentially the same thing as the “Nation” chant they actually said. Faarooq dominates, as the name of his stable suggests (The Nation of *Domination*, not Masturbation, although if you remember the promo he would cut on Reverend D-Von in 2002, he is quite fond of that, too), until Taker reverses a top-rope dive by Faarooq into a slam. D’Lo pulls the top rope down when Taker runs the ropes, but the Dead Man lands on his feet, then waits around until Faarooq charges at him with the ring steps. Undertaker boots the steps into Faarooq, leading one fan at ringside to point and cackle maniacally. Faarooq recovers and piledrives Taker, who no-sells it and sits right up. The nation interferes, but the LOD arrives to TCB on the NOD as Vince signs off.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Maneuvers (Year total: 28)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">10 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-55839372182065362682015-05-05T17:50:00.000-04:002015-07-28T16:01:38.735-04:00Raw #"197" - February 17th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sycho Sid’s music plays to open the live show in Nashville. He challenges new champion Bret Hart, who last night won the company’s first multi-man match (although every elimination was by throwing an opponent over the top rope, so it might as well have been a battle royal). The Undertaker, says announcers Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler (no Vince tonight), is scheduled to challenge the winner of this match at Wrestlemania. Before the Hart-Sid match can begin though, Steve Austin rushes in and brawls with both men before being taken away by a what JR calls a “bevy” of officials. Odd choice of words, considering that “bevy” is usually used to describe a group of beauties. I suppose Rene Goulet is pretty cute. Sid gets hurt in the mayhem, suffering perhaps the second-worst leg injury he’ll ever endure. “Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!” he says, perhaps auditioning for the role of Florida Evans in Good Times: The Movie. The match gets postponed until later in the night — so much for the WWF never pulling a bait-and-switch.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After airing a clip of Shawn’s rambling speech from last Thursday, the announcers recap last night’s Final Four match through video stills, such as this one showing the second-worst eye injury of Vader’s career. Backstage, Sid vows that not “rain or hell-water or Stone Cold Steve Austin” will keep him from winning the title tonight. Overall, it was one of Sid’s more coherent promos. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Wildman Marc Mero, who along with Sable (and Bret Hart and Sid and Steve Austin and Undertaker and Ahmed Johnson and pretty much the entire roster) has been more “aggressive” in recent weeks, faces Savio Vega. Faarooq and Clarence Mason watch on from the balcony, perhaps scouting the former Johnny B Badd as the prospective second African-American wrestler to join the Nation. Injury-prone Ahmed Johnson was released earlier today, says JR, from a hospital in Lowell, MA, where he has been since Thursday Raw Thursday, so he’s unlikely to show up tonight to confront the Nation again. Instead, it’s Sable who takes it to the NOD, literally kicking a PG-13 member’s ass after he puts the boots to Mero. Sable then gets chased into the ring by the NOD, who look to gang up on Mero. The referee calls for the bell, and none other than Ahmed Johnson, clad in an orange sweatsuit several sizes too big for him, appears with a 2x4 to clean house.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jim Ross announces that Wrestlemania 13 is presented by Playstation. The logo has changed since last night, when the pay-per-view cut away during Bret Hart’s victory celebration to advertise “Wrestlemania XIII” on Coliseum Home Video May 6th. Some time in the past 21 hours, someone in Titan Towers decided that Roman numerals are for suckers. This year’s Mania gets the In Your House treatment with its own nickname, in this case, “Heat,” so-called because the event would make for a passable episode of the WWF’s future Sunday evening program of the same name. Leif Cassidy, who has generic new non-Rockers music, awaits the arrival of Rocky Maivia, whom he is challenging for the Intercontinental title tonight. Leif earned the title shot by losing to Marc Mero last night. Backstage, Bret Hart gives an interview and expresses his support for Vader. Or proclaiming that he has proven himself the best for the fourth time. It’s kind of hard to tell from this screen shot. Lawler says Bret must be glad that Steve Austin injured Sid. “Shut up, Lawler,” says Bret nonchalantly. Rocky Maivia, who has been IC champion for four days and has generic theme music rivaling Leif Cassidy’s finally comes to the ring. So after about five minutes, we can finally start the match… after Sunny makes it to ringside as special guest time keeper. It’s a very important role, I’m sure, despite the fact that I can’t think of a single non-tournament bout in WWF history to this point that has ended in a time-limit draw. “I don’t know what the seven wonders of the world are,” says Lawler, “but Sunny’s got two of them!” For the record, the seven wonders are the Great Pyramid of Giza, the hanging gardens of Babylon, the statue of Zeus at Olympia, the Colossus of Rhodes, the lighthouse at Crete, and Sunny’s breasts. Speaking of Sunny’s breasts, both they and Sunny will be featured on Entertainment Tonight tomorrow night in a piece called, “The Queen of Cyberspace,” which is sure to interest all the hackers out there surfing the information superhighway. Rocky and Leif grapple to basically no reaction, no matter how many arm drags and arm bars Maivia pulls off. When Jericho rattles of his list of 1004 holds and says, “arm bar” every other move, he could be describing The Rock’s offense early in his career. Jim Ross says he can’t remember a single rookie making as big an impact as Rocky Maivia, leading Jerry Lawler to proclaim Tiger Woods a flash in the pan following a key loss in competitive adultery. No, wait — golf. That’s what he was famous for in 1997. Jim Ross announces that in two weeks, Raw will emanate from Berlin, Germany for the finals of the European Championship tournament, not bothering to explain what the European Championship is or, more importantly, why it is being created. In the ring, Rocky tosses Leif Cassidy from the turnbuckles, but at the announce table, Jerry Lawler gets distracted by an “ECW rules” sign held up by a fan in the front row. Maivia hits a flying body press on Leif, but instead of pinning him, he stands up to do some stupid arm motions, then his finisher, the shoulderbreaker. Rocky pins Leif to retain the title. Jerry Lawler yanks away the ECW sign at ringside and rants about ECW. He says that 99% of people have never heard of ECW, but rather than keeping it that way, he gives them publicity by railing against “Extreme Championship Wrestling” from Philadelphia, PA. Check your local listings! The King challenges ECW to show up on next week’s raw from the Manhattan Center. Finally, Raw goes to commercial. Maybe the WWF is trying to gain a ratings advantage over Nitro by having fewer commercials (which of course would reducing the amount of advertising time available and defeat the purpose of having high ratings). </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We see a clip of “Double J” Jesse Jam(m)es singing his one song on TNN, The Nashville Network. Years later, Joey Styles would claim that TNN considered Hee-Haw cultural programming, so it shouldn’t come as a shock to see the cable station air country music in a wrestling ring during prime time. Goldust comes to the ring with Marlena, who was attacked last night by “a fan,” for an in-ring interview with Kevin Kelly. Marlena says that despite the rumors, Goldust is “all man.” “She sounds like she knows from experience,” says Lawler. He means sex. Hunter Hearst Helmsley comes to ringside and throws a cup of water in Goldust’s face. Well, the water, anyway, but not the cup. He then Pedigrees Goldust but gets slapped by Marlena. The same woman who attacked Marlena last night enters the ring and shakes Marlena like a rag doll, if kids shake rag dolls. Maybe she shakes her more like a maraca. Of course, the huge woman is Chyna, the Ninth Wonder of the World (after Andre the Giant, Sunny’s breasts, and the other five wonders). “That’s a woman!?” shouts Lawler. Event staff take the mystery woman away, while Goldust carries Marlena away.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Without going to commercial, The Hardy Boys take on resident jobbers The Headbangers. But this is 1997, so it’s the other way around. While the match is going on, Faarooq cuts a promo about how Ahmed Johnson lives in luxury while pretending to know what “the streets” is like. Faarooq explains what exactly “the streets” entails, including having to rewash one’s underwear every day. Oh please. Do not lecture Ahmed on needing to wash his underwear. The leader of the Nation then challenges Ahmed at Wrestlemania to a Chicago Street Fight, which may or may not be won by washing a pair of underwear faster than one’s opponent. Getting back to the match, Lawler bets Matt Hardy thinks he’s in a mosh pit right now against the Headbangers. He then asks JR whether he has ever seen a mosh pit, to which Ross replies, “a couple of times on the news,” confusing Lawler. Ross wonders aloud whether the Headbangers are “disciples — what’s that lady’s name? Marilyn Manson?” Mosh clotheslines a running Jeff Hardy, flipping him onto his shoulders. Thrasher pins Jeff, whose title match with The Undertaker Jim Ross would commentate in five years’ time.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Tonight’s Raw is brought to you by Twix cookie bars and the US Army, which has still not figured out that registering and advertising its own URL would be a lot easier than telling people to go to a hyperlink on the WWF AOL site. Bret Hart makes his way toward the ring from backstage but is attacked from behind. Sid intervenes to ensure that his opponent doesn’t get injured, leading to numerous officials including Vince McMahon himself rushing in to pry the men apart. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Gorilla Monsoon is backstage with Kevin Kelly, where he guarantees that the advertised Bret Hart-Sid title match will take place. Unlike other places, in the WWF they deliver what they promise and don’t pull a bait-and-switch. Keep in mind that the only reason that Sid is getting a title shot tonight is because his advertised match against Shawn Michaels last week was cancelled. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfp9nmrwV9W3ZSFtPHjAcu4NiVaJhda74wNrTgeJQXbK_dZNfnsRq2MoJsYr3N0hZxbGLGlmLYTs5koVslpxzbf1KdlZNuCHPcmxPt-75PXNjk0JH3lkO6HIjbQwPgWRvba6zydy29yVs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-26+at+3.30.26+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfp9nmrwV9W3ZSFtPHjAcu4NiVaJhda74wNrTgeJQXbK_dZNfnsRq2MoJsYr3N0hZxbGLGlmLYTs5koVslpxzbf1KdlZNuCHPcmxPt-75PXNjk0JH3lkO6HIjbQwPgWRvba6zydy29yVs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-26+at+3.30.26+PM.png" width="200" /></a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm0C_rsgMfzC9dPxGE3m3HZzA_9SqTwQB434USl2cJYu-dNxy23rJnZmS6AqcdGFsgkOs2D8cX3MFwKtM-kFUjuLaJi_py2VpaG2jbxwwVB4Q2lT_NufnbLKan1mmocZFvsdF4BOHheM4/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-26+at+3.37.59+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm0C_rsgMfzC9dPxGE3m3HZzA_9SqTwQB434USl2cJYu-dNxy23rJnZmS6AqcdGFsgkOs2D8cX3MFwKtM-kFUjuLaJi_py2VpaG2jbxwwVB4Q2lT_NufnbLKan1mmocZFvsdF4BOHheM4/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-26+at+3.37.59+PM.png" width="200" /></a></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">For now, Flash Funk comes to the ring instead of the advertised main event, which, for a company that doesn’t pull bait-and-switch, has been teased and postponed an awful lot. The Slammy-Award Owen Hart arrives with not only his Slammy, and not only both tag team title belts, but his manager Clarence Mason, who is also the manager of the Nation of Domination. Do you think Owen could join the Nation? Yes, but only after both he and the NOD ditch Mason as their manager, and only after the NOD goes all-black. Go figure. Jim Ross relays bad news about Marlena coughing up blood backstage after the attack by “that lady.” Both announcers then imply that she might be a man. Jerry Lawler gets a phone call from Paul Heyman, then taunts him about how is biggest stars include The Blue Meanie, The Sandman, and Sabu, all of whom would eventually be signed by WWE. Paul E then takes a pot shot at Lawler’s legal history, vowing that “as long as the neighborhood watch doesn’t have to be informed” that the King will be in the area, his ECW wrestlers will be at Raw. Lawler yells about the time he broke Paul E’s jaw and has to be calmed down by JR, who reminds him that there is a match going on. Speaking of the match, Clarence Mason argues with Owen outside the ring, allowing Flash Funk to take advantage with a dive off the top rope. The Bulldog runs down and kicks Clarence Mason out. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Funk and Hart exchange pin attempts to no avail after the commercial break. Steve Austin then gives an interview backstage via split-screen. He says that Shawn Michaels quitting the WWF should make him, as the Royal Rumble winner, the WWF champion. He then announces his opening of “a whole keg of whoop-ass,” which I believe is his first mention of the drink on Raw. He skipped right past the can and straight to the keg, huh? Maybe they can put “whoop-ass” on a t-shirt like they did with “Austin 3:16,” except hopefully it will take less than eight months to do so. Owen crotches himself on the second turnbuckle while leaping at a cornered Funk, allowing Flash to capitalize with a scoop slam and flying body press. A moonsault from Flash fails to put away the Slammy-winner, so Funk runs the ropes, only to get bashed in the back with the statue by Bulldog and have his leg held down during the ensuing pin. Owen then argues with Bulldog, now that he knows what it feels like to have one’s opponent hit by a Slammy. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Hunter Hearst Helmsley arrives to the strains of Beethoven’s Ode to Joy, who JR speculates is in cahoots with Chyna. Lawler denies this, basically saying that the mystery woman is too ugly to associate with HHH and calling her a “deranged fan.” I guess you’d have to be deranged to wear wrestling tights in public. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">This year’s Slammy Awards will be held the Friday before Wrestlemania and is presented by Full Metal, the only wrestling themes album to feature the entrance music of the superstars from WWF and WCW (considering that Razor, Diesel, The Kid, and Jeff Jarrett have all jumped ship by now). Helmsley takes on Bart Gunn as Honky Tonk Man pontificates on commentary about whether HHH was as great an Intercontinental Champion as he (the answer: no, Honky Tonk Man is the greatest IC champion of all time). JR advertises the Superstar Line and says that kids need their “momma’s and daddy’s permission.” Sorry, no single-parent kids allowed. The match ends abruptly as Goldust runs in and chases Helmsley up the arena steps, leading to a countout victory by Bart Gunn. JR proclaims that the WWF title match is next — for real this time — but that you should check out La Femme Nikita after the show. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">But first: a medical update on Shawn Michaels by Dr. James Andrews. Guess what: no surgery for HBK! That’s the good news. The bad news: Andrews says Michaels “will be able to resume his rasslin’ career.” That must mean that he’s going to WCW, because as we all know, the WWF isn’t in the rasslin’ business, it’s in the entertainment business. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The company that doesn’t jerk viewers around next shows replays of the previous two times tonight that the main event was set to take place but didn’t. Finally, it’s time for the real thing (unless Austin interferes again). And here it is: Sid vs. Bret… after the commercial.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret Hart quickly puts the boots to the “bee-a-muth,” who fights back with a series of weak, telegraphed punches that Lawler nonetheless compares to a machine gun. Hart fights back with the Five Moves of Doom, starting with a backbreaker, followed a headbutt to the lower abdomen. Wait, that’s not part of the Five Moves? Dang. Well, one of these days, I’m going to catch Hart doing the mythical Five Moves of Doom in sequence. Sid goes back on the offensive with strikes, but Bret Hart cuts the big man down by working his injured knee, even smashing it against the ring post. He follows this up with a figure four on the ring post, which, evidently, he would not debut at the upcoming Wrestlemania 13. Back in the ring, Sid clubs his way out of the corner and clotheslines Bret, then hits a leg drop, which Hart kicks out of twice. He then leaps off the second rope for a rare aerial move, this time having a much better landing than he would with the last aerial move he would ever attempt. The leg drop connects, but Bret breaks out of a chokeslam attempt. Hart misses a crossbody and lands on the ropes. Hart back-drops Sid to the outside, where he lands on his feet and knocks down an interfering Steve Austin. At Wrestlemania, Bret Hart would emulate Austin by also interfering in the main event three times. From the ring apron, Sid actually performs a sunset flip on Bret, who rolls through and puts the sharpshooter on the Sycho one. However, Austin hits Bret Hart in the back of the head with a chair, which the referee misses somehow. Earl Hebner, taking a chance and thinking that maybe Bret Hart just collapsed on his own, lets this interference slide, allowing Sid to powerbomb Bret Hart. After an extremely slow count, Sid still gets the pin and wins the title, the first WWF title change on free television since Andre “beat” Hogan in 1988. The Undertaker’s music hits, and after a blackout, taker appears at ringside before confronting his Wrestlemania opponent face to face. Talk about changing plans in a hurry — this time last week, the Mania main event was supposed to be Bret vs. Shawn. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Tonight’s episode is one of the most infamous in Raw history, in which Shawn Michaels will forfeit his WWF title live in the ring and give an incredibly confusing farewell speech. I guess they didn’t have enough footage from the last four or five times he forfeited a title to cobble together a video package explaining it all. This comes one episode after the announcers guaranteed that Shawn vs. Sid would take place and that Shawn doesn’t make promises he can’t keep. You’ve got to wonder what they were thinking, since it’s pretty easy to rattle off a list of promises Shawn hasn’t kept, like staying within the allotted time for his Wrestlemania X ladder match or wrestling Sid at Summerslam ’95 or dropping the title to Vader.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Hunter Hearst Helmsley, who is scheduled to defend his Intercontinental Title in three days (tonight being Thursday Raw Thursday Live) against Ahmed Johnson, defends his title against Rocky Maivia in tonight’s first match. The In Your House match will be Ahmed’s first opportunity to regain the title he never lost, but the announcers haven’t pointed out this fact. Not at ringside is Helmsley’s “butler” Curtis Hughes, who is, of course, “conspicuous by his absence.” Maybe HHH fired him for having made it to the King of the Ring before. Vince speculates that Rocky Johnson is watching tonight, as Maivia is the son of Johnson, as well as the grandson of Peter Maivia. “Where’s he watching from?” jabs Lawler. “Alright, let’s be nice,” says Vince. Randy Orton, being a teenager at this time, is not available to answer, “He’s down there, in hell!” In an historic moment, Jim Ross first describes Triple H as “cerebral,” which Vince laughs off. The “cerebral” description isn’t very funny, but what is funny is that JR’s exact words were, “the most cerebral Intercontinental Champion since the Honky Tonk Man.” Rocky knocks Hunter out of the ring with a dropkick a few notches below the Bob Holly level, but blows his momentum by running into the ring post. “That could happen to anyone,” says the King, “but it happens to the stupidest first.” Vince describes Hunter as a veteran (of five years) and, taking a page out of Gorilla Monsoon’s playbook, Rocky Maivia as a “youngster.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Helmsley is still in firm control of the match, wailing on Rocky in the corner. The Honky Tonk Man walks to ringside, distracting Hunter temporarily. Honky tells the announcers that Hunter is a good champion, but he’s not on the Honky Tonk Man’s level. This remark goes unchallenged by the announce team, which for months has been pretending that Honky is some kind of legend. Triple H knocks down a running Maivia with a knee lift, a <b>Maneuver </b>(#1) that impresses Vince, but not Honky Tonk Man. He’s not impressed by Rocky, either, nor is Jerry Lawler. Maivia hits a punch on Triple H, making a bunch of stupid arm movements beforehand to add power, then hits a flying body press that Hunter rolls through. Rocky kicks out of a piledriver, then a superplex. Hunter sets up for the Pedigree, but Rocky is too dazed to even stand up for that. Apparently, the best counter to the pedigree is to just not cooperate. Who knew? Rocky then surprises Hunter with a small package for the victory and the Intercontinental Title, which changes hands (officially) for the third time in Raw history. Rocky then gives a very un-Rock-like (but very Rocky Maivia-like) promo promising to always give the best he can. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sunny is back on Raw for the first time in nearly two months. She used to be on practically every week, but that was back when she was managing three wrestlers instead of zero. Sunny reaches down her dress to retrieve a card with her lines on it, leading to an abrupt commercial break. When Raw returns, Sunny is introducing the wrestlers for the next match. In Aldo’s biggest career highlight to date, Sunny says that his is the sexiest Portuguese accent she has ever heard. His partner Bob “Spark Plugg” Holly could make her heart race, she adds. Too bad we’ve already missed her intro for Mosh and Thrasher, though. Who knows what innuendo she could have cooked up for a team with “Head” and “Banger” in their name. Mosh, who within four years will be managed by recent WWF signing Tiger Ali Singh, starts off the match with Holly. Vince McMahon praises Shawn Michaels as someone you must respect, whether you like long hair or earrings or “what he has in his belly button or doesn’t have in his belly button.” That’s the most touching tribute I’ve ever heard that included the words, “belly button” (twice). Shawn’s injury is a long time coming, says Vince, and he will get knee surgery (which he won’t). Jerry blames Vince and JR for hyping up HBK and driving him so hard, while Vince feels responsible for Shawn having such a tough schedule. But what would Vince have to do with scheduling matches? Mosh misses a moonsault on Aldo, an <b>Attempted Maneuver</b> (#2) that Vince claims nearly makes the Headbanger vomit. Still, the future Chaz maintains his composure long enough to double-team Aldo with a combination powerbomb/flying leg drop for the victory. Sunny credits the victory erroneously to Mosh and “Thrash.” Can you blame her? Her note card is clearly still jammed down the front of her dress.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Speaking of which, now it’s time for Shawn Michaels to make a complete boob of himself. The Heartbreak Kid will hopefully keep us abreast of his recent injury. Vince, who holds the mic in the ring, says this injury comes as a shock, although maybe it shouldn’t (it shouldn’t). Shawn, who sounds pretty well hammered, stammers through a long and confusing speech, first saying that his injury’s “a lot more serious than it was last time,” referring to his surrendering of the IC title in October 1995 due to a concussion. Yes, according to Michaels, this knee injury is much more grave a threat to his career than the severe concussion that supposedly caused him to collapse in the ring and made even one more blow to the head, in the words of his doctor, “life-threatening.” Still, give Shawn props for going the whole year of 1996 without forfeiting a title. Don’t worry, though; he’ll make up the difference this year. Shawn continues slurring his way through his farewell address, talking over the ever-louder “We Want Sid” chants and saying that he’s glad that they chant people’s names and enjoy themselves before putting his arm around the audience’s shoulders and tell them they’re the greatest guy in the world. Maybe I’m exaggerating a little. Regardless, the fans really start laying into Shawn with the booze. I mean, boos. “I don’t know where I’m at right now,” says Shawn in his first honest statement of the whole night. He says, in effect, that since he accomplished all of his goals in one title reign, there is no need for a second, clearly having watched that Simpsons episode with George HW Bush. HIs exact words are, “It was the single most greatest year of my life.” Also, he doesn’t have any toughness in him, despite saying for months that he would be as bad as he needed to be. “So I guess,” says Shawn, “ya know, here ya go, here’s your belt,” handing off his title to Gorilla Monsoon like a snotty Kleenex. If I had to guess one thing that made Vince ban all references to the championship title as a “belt,” I’d swear it’s this right here. And of course, I’ll be remiss if I don’t Shawn announcing that he has lost his smile; for weeks, Shawn walked around on his bad knee stapling MISSING fliers on every telephone pole in San Antonio. Vince hugs Shawn, giving a look to the camera that suggests even he, Shawn’s #1 fan, isn’t buying this. JR declares that in his 25 years in the business, he’s never had such a pain in his gut; he must have indigestion or something. Michaels takes one final lap around the ring to say goodbye to the fans, and on his way up the aisle, he remembers that he has a knee injury and starts limping.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">"The Heartbreak Kid is a fountain of misinformation. He got out of dropping the title in a hurry!"</span></td></tr>
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Back at the announce table, Vince McMahon tries to give a somber speech about Shawn’s possible retirement, which is “nothing short of tragic,” but a bunch of teenagers run into the frame and mug for the cameras. Savio Vega arrives with the Nation of Domination to take on his fellow Bone Street Krew member The Undertaker. Despite his heel turn, Savio still wears his bright red shirt to the ring. Unlike the fan-favorite version of Savio (okay, “favorite” is a strong word), the new heel Vega is not above cheating, giving Taker a mule kick to the groin. Savio takes control of the match, proving that he could have beaten The Undertaker in the 1995 King of the Ring finals had the Dead Man not lost to Mabel in the first round. Savio dominates for a good five minutes (as suggested by the name of his faction) until The Undertaker counters a back drop attempt with a sort of famouser that folds Savio up like an accordion. If Vega hasn’t already been incapacitated by a torn hamstring from that move, he gets taken out with a chokeslam and pinned by Taker. The rest of the Nation runs in, including Faarooq and Crush, but Ahmed Johnson arrives to make the save. Then it’s Taker’s turn to make the save for Faarooq, punching out the Nation members ganging up on Johnson.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Backstage, Gorilla Monsoon tells Dok Hendrix that Sid will get his promised title shot in four nights on Raw, the night after In Your House, against whoever wins the Final Four match. Tonight, though, his opponent is Steve Austin, who attacks him from behind. However, Sid quickly recovers and delivers his famed ridiculously telegraphed punches. Austin escapes a chokeslam attempt with a low blow that the referee somehow doesn’t see. The two brawl on the outside as Austin gets cheered by name, with Sid ending up colliding with the ring post. Inside the ring, Austin puts Sid in an abdominal stretch, although Sid is far too tall for Stone Cold to put it on right. If only Gorilla Monsoon were still on commentary to lecture us on the finer points of abdominal stretches. Austin has to let go after the ref catches him using the ropes. Sid goes back on the offense, but Bret Hart runs in to rough up Austin himself, causing a disqualification. That means that Sid loses, making him a phenomenally pissed psycho, to use alliteration. Sid and Bret get into a punching argument that takes two Hebners and a Brisco to break up. Backstage, Vader recalls his recent victories over all three of his In Your House opponents.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jerry Lawler writes up a Western Union money order to his mother for Valentine’s Day. He says it’s so she can buy him presents with the money, because he won’t admit his Oedipus complex. I’d have one, too if she were my mom. Remember when she showed up at the first In Your House? Yowza. Western Union, coincidentally, sponsors this Sunday’s In Your House pay-per-view. Vince shows us a replay of Shawn’s promo, specifically the part where he talks about losing his smile. Vince calls it “one of the classiest moments in the history of the World Wrestling Federation.” Between Sable and the smile-less Shawn Michaels, I’m pretty sure Vince doesn’t know what “classy” means.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Crush and Faarooq challenge for fellow Clarence Mason clients Bulldog & Owen’s tag team titles. Vince laments Shawn Michaels’s “devastating knee injury,” and JR takes the opportunity to kiss HBK’s butt some more, saying that he can’t remember the last time an athlete thanked the fans. Well, I’m pretty sure Bret Hart did when he came back to the WWF. Ahmed, too. And Marc Mero. And Tiger Ali Singh thanked the fans just last week. So, yeah, pretty much every time babyface is given time on the mic. Crush tosses Owen Hart around out of frustration at how little his career has advanced since 1993 as compared to The Rocket. Bulldog tags in right before the break.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Brian Adams delivers his patented bad piledriver, this time a one-handed variation that is more dangerous than ugly. Faarooq tags in but telegraphs a back body drop, allowing Bulldog to counter by smashing his former WCW tag team buddy’s face into the mat for a <b>Maneuver </b>(#3). Bret Hart looks on backstage and comments on Shawn Michaels’s possible retirement, saying that he believes Shawn will be back again, possibly to win the title again. Possibly in Montreal. Crush and Faarooq cut Davey Boy off from his partner. “The British Bulldog in a body scissors,” says Vince. “Talk about body scissors, how would you like to be body-scissored by La Femme Nikita!” Just kidding! What Vince actually says is, “Talk about body scissors, how would you like to be body-scissored by La Femme Nikita!” Oh. Well, damn. Bulldog escapes a particularly homo-erotic bear hug from Faarooq, but Crush prevents him from tagging out, then double-teams (with wrestling moves) Davey Boy with his partner as Owen inadvertently distracts the referee. Bulldog hits Crush with an enziguiri, allowing him the hot tag. Owen cleans house with spinning heel kicks, then hits Crush with a <b>High-Risk Maneuver</b> (#4 - flying dropkick). Crush sidesteps a running attack from Hart, tossing Owen to the outside, where he appears to injure his knee, then gets counted out as the Nation beats up his partner. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret Hart arrives to take on Vader, first giving his sunglasses to “one happy young man.” “One happy young little gal,” says Vince, correcting himself. Nice, Vince. Usually it’s Jerry who says those kinds of mean things. The Undertaker’s bell tolls, and the Dead Man cuts a Dangerfield-esque promo about not getting any respect. Vader attacks Bret from behind and tosses him outside. As Raw goes to commercial, Stone Cold is seen for a split second about to put the boots to Hart.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The ring is fills with fog left over from Vader’s entrance. Vader leaps off the top rope, but Bret counters with a powerslam, catching the big man in mid-air and slamming him. Bret then body slams Vader but is unable to put the Sharpshooter on. Vader charges at Hart in the corner, but Hart ducks and crouches behind Vader’s legs to trip him, schoolyard-style. Bret slaps on the Sharpshooter, but Vader grabs the ropes. Hitman breaks after a count of four, but Steve Austin appears on the balcony, distracting Hart, who gets punched out by Vader. The big man then sets up for a Vader Bomb, then changes his mind and executes a moonsault, which Hart avoids. Hart pins the stunned Vader. Austin tries to jump over the balcony’s guard rail to get to Bret, forgetting about the arena’s stairways and the laws of gravity, but Pat Patterson and two referees are there to hold him back. </span></td> </tr>
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Maneuvers (Year total: 24)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-61262860635829554102015-04-21T17:00:00.000-04:002015-04-21T18:31:16.629-04:00Raw #196 - February 3rd, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It’s a special “Royal Rumble” Raw! Contrary to what last week’s promotion implied, this episode will not feature the Royal Rumble match aside from a few clips here and there, but it is the first two-hour Raw in history! And it kinda looks like crap!</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Tonight’s Raw was taped a few days early at the Sky Dome in front of a crowd of 25,000 fans, the largest ever for a Monday Night Raw but nowhere near the arena’s 68,000-person capacity. Still, they probably didn’t have to give away 20,000 free tickets to fill up the arena, and, unlike 1997’s Royal Rumble, the WWF didn’t do a hard sell of it every week on TV for months. The opening match is Vader vs. Steve Austin, and, since this match pits two heels against each other, by law it has to be called a “Tough Man Contest.” If Shawn Michaels and Rick Martel had had their “no face punches” match on Raw, Vince probably would have called that a Tough Man Contest, too. Before the match even starts, Bret Hart storms the ring to brawl with Austin, who really should have seen the Hitman coming, given how long the Sky Dome’s entryway is. Paul Bearer gets knocked down in the “mee-lay,” but, as this is a special episode of Raw, it’s Jim Ross who mispronounces that word tonight, not Vince. When the dust settles, Austin still gets the jump on Vader when the bell rings, stomping him. Vader soon takes control, playing the heel in this match, but blows his advantage when once again he attempts the Vader Bomb, then steps up to the top rope to tease a moonsault, then steps back down, meeting a low blow from Austin.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Vader misses a butt splash, then gets body-slammed by Austin, a move that is completely overlooked by the announcers as they talk about the next pay-per-view main event. Austin stomps away at Vader while the big man is on the ropes, leading the mustachioed referee to intervene and get a stunner for his trouble. The two wrestlers brawl up the aisle as more referees come to the ring and throw out the match, meaning that another “Tough Man Contest” ends in a DQ.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Flash Funk is in the ring next to take on a member of the Nation of Domination. Several nation members walk down the aisle, including Clarence Mason, Savio Vega, the as-yet-unnamed D’Lo Brown and… good ol’ JR? Say it ain’t so, Jimmy! No, sorry, he’s just trying to get an interview with Savio. Vince assures us that there will be two title matches tonight, and there will be no “bait-and-switch tactics”, unlike, presumably WCW Nitro. Easy for Vince to say; this show was taped days in advance. Just wait till next week, Vince, and see how the WWF title match turns out. Dok Hendrix joins the commentary team, kicking off his night with the extraordinary statement that Savio Vega turned his back on his “millions of fans” by joining NOD. Flash Funk tries to put Savio away early with a <b>Great Maneuver</b> (#1 - twisting sunset flip). The New Sensation Slammy-nominee manages only a two count before getting choked out by Vega. The WWF’s answer to Turbo Man fights back, however, taking out his frustrations with the unflattering yellow-and-red bodysuit by ramming Vega’s head into the turnbuckles. He then hits a <b>High-Risk Maneuever</b>, spinning in mid-air to hit a splash. <b>What a Maneuver</b> (#3)! Flash gets him (no he doesn’t), so he hits another <b>Devastating Maneuver</b> (#4), the somersault leg drop. After climbing to the top once again, Funk jumps onto D’Lo Brown on the arena floor, but misses a moonsault on Vega and gets pinned. Savio’s victory earns him a hug from Faarooq. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We catch an interview taped earlier in the night with Peta Wilson, star of La Femme Nikita. Vince asks, and I quote, “What about the, uh, sexuality, if you would?” If you’ve ever wanted to know what Vince sounds like when he talks dirty, there’s a hint (“Oh, yeah! Show me your pectoral area!”). He goes on: “Seems to me there’s a… well, there’s a certain degree of sex that I’m sure everyone appreciates.” </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span id="goog_114103052"></span><span id="goog_114103053"></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jim Ross interviews Sid, who is supposed to challenge for Shawn Michaels’s title next week. Key quote: “Evil is just that. It is evil! And sometimes, we mistaken it for happiness.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Next, Dok Hendrix wants you to call the Superstar Line to find out what happened to Yokozuna, Brian Pillman, Sunny, and Jim Cornette. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince interviews Owen and Bulldog briefly about their recent troubles, giving the WWF another excuse to show snippets from the Royal Rumble. We also get this perplexing quote from Vince: “The tag team championship could disintegrate right here tonight on Raw!” Does he mean that the champions will split up, or that the belts will turn to dust or something? At least that’s a better way to get rid of a title than putting on Hornswoggle.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Before the tag title match, we get promo copy for Raw’s advertisers, including Dok Hendrix subtly suggesting that Jim Ross use Stridex pads and Jim Ross’s first plug for Skittles (which does not include the words, “fruity” and “delicious” repeated dozens of times). The challengers, Furnas and LaFon, face an uphill battle, as Doug has the flu. Plus, the titles might disintegrate before they can win the match. The two teams take turns being all technically sound while Dok plugs Shawn and Sid’s “rubber match” (so called because Shawn will seriously stretch the truth to avoid having it). The babyface team have the match won numerous times, but the referee is distracted away from the pin each time. Once, Bulldog is so caught up in posing for the crowd that he’s the one completely oblivious to Owen being pinned. The two argue as Raw goes to commercial.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Furnas hits an overhead belly-to-belly to Bulldog and makes the hot tag to Phil LaFon. Owen also tags in and lands a <b>Beautiful Maneuver</b> (#5 - flying body press) that LaFon rolls through for a pin attempt. Lafon then hits a DDT and pins Owen for a three-count, but the referee throws out the pin when he sees Owen’s foot on the bottom rope. Bulldog then proceeds to break up a series of pin attempts on Owen, risking disqualification according to Vince, although every tag match would be like this during the Attitude Era. Bulldog back-drops Owen over the top rope </span><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">accidentally</span>, insofar as that is possible, before powerslamming LaFon. However, Owen is the legal man who, after feigning an injury, gets counted out, costing his team the match but not the championships (which, as far as we know, have not disintegrated). Bulldog argues with Owen, who sells his injury but jumps up and down on it when Davey Boy’s not looking.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Ahmed Johnson, who teams with the Undertaker tonight, tells us that he doesn’t take Prozac anymore. He gets interrupted by The Undertaker, who grabs Johnson’s throat for some reason before telling him to wait till Taker is around to take on the Nation. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Goldust is in the ring as the announcers stick it to WCW once more by assuring us that tonight’s main event definitely will take place. He takes on Crush, who gets clotheslined to the arena floor early on. He then works over Crush with arm bars and hammerlocks while the graphics on the side of the screen malfunction. Hunter Hearst Helmsley strolls to the ring to stalk Marlena, distracting Goldust, who gets sneak-attacked by the jailbird and beaten up very boringly for the next few minutes. Goldust turns it around with a DDT. Before he can hit the Curtain Call, Savio sneaks into the ring and kicks the spit [sic] out of him. Crush wins with the Heart Punch. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A vignette promoting the New Blackjacks airs, featuring only Blackjack Mulligan rambling in front of a campfire. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn08PP4OxsOaCuT2SJ_FCAfmGMBxdwqDbtemBADqQ0xLPw3O26MHKv891971Mc2gfI2ObEvhhQfWIKJ0yXjOZkTYaURhnUTpp-BxqY10LAcAKO-8DjcJEqfo259xyhVc9jANdDosnCUbc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-10+at+9.51.28+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhn08PP4OxsOaCuT2SJ_FCAfmGMBxdwqDbtemBADqQ0xLPw3O26MHKv891971Mc2gfI2ObEvhhQfWIKJ0yXjOZkTYaURhnUTpp-BxqY10LAcAKO-8DjcJEqfo259xyhVc9jANdDosnCUbc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-10+at+9.51.28+PM.png" height="148" width="200" /></a> </td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">This week’s Slam of the Week took place fifteen days ago at the Royal Rumble. I guess it’s a slow week for slams in the WWF. Shawn Michaels comes to the ring for an interview. Jim Ross praises the WWF champion for not being in his mid-forties, not being bald, and “not making promises that he can’t keep,” since he promises to defend his title at next week’s Raw. Ha! The HBK gets booed by the “partisan crowd” (consisting mostly of members of the Bret Hart Party). Vince tries to make sense out of Sid’s promo earlier in the night, claiming that the WWF title brings out the evil in people, and Shawn Michaels agrees. Shawn says that if he has to be bad to keep the title, he’ll be the worst guy the WWF has ever seen. He’s right about the latter statement, but he won’t hold onto the title. Shawn says that Bret Hart can call himself the best there is, was, etc., but he won’t call himself champion. He then compares himself to Muhammad Ali, who was hated when he was champion, so Bret Hart comes out and says HBK is more like Dennis Rodman, the freaky cross-dresser of the Chicago Bulls and current unofficial diplomat to North Korea. Bret agrees with Shawn’s self-assessment from a few months back when he called himself a “degenerate,” then calls him a jackass and a punk. Steve Austin runs to the ring and brawls with Bret Hart, who is also apparently too near-sighted to see him coming. Next, Sid strolls into the ring as Raw cuts to break.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Shawn and Bret are back in each other’s faces with the WWF title belt on the mat between them. Shawn tries to pick it up, but Bret puts his foot on it and picks it up himself before dropping it in front of Michaels. You know, for a guy with only a 50% chance of retaining the title next week, and for a guy with only a 25% chance of emerging the #1 contender in two weeks, these two are talking an awful lot about being WWF champion.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We see footage of today’s contract signing by Tiger Ali Singh, the second-generation Indian Canadian superstar whose career highlight will be managing Nation of Domination lackey D’Lo Brown and Chaz of the Flying Nuns to numerous victories on Sunday Night Heat. Shane McMahon and Brother Love look on, quite pleased with themselves.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Marc Mero, who two months ago lost what was stipulated to be his very last Intercontinental title shot against Hunter Hearst Helmsley, now receives an Intercontinental title shot from Hunter Hearst Helmsley. This time, the stipulation states that neither Sable nor Helmsley’s “butler” Curtis Hughes are allowed at ringside. I’m going to guess that Hunter didn’t suggest that rule himself. On the other hand, Sable has interfered in Mero’s matches as of late, having kicked The Undertaker in the ribs this weekend on Superstars. Helmsley backs off Mero in the early going, drawing comparisons to the cowardly TNT Network Robin Hood, who, the announcers remind us, has smaller arms than La Femme Nikita. Helmsley gets the upper hand but is nearly pinned by Wildman’s<b> Maneuver </b>(#6 - leaping leg cradle from behind). Hunter responds with a <b>Maneuver</b> (#7 - knee smash) of his own.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">When Raw returns from break, Hunter gets his prominent proboscis run into the top turnbuckle after Mero ducks out of the way. Helmsley gets sent over the top rope, allowing the Wildman to hit a <b>Maneuver </b>(#8 - somersault plancha) onto the floor and score a near-fall back in the ring. An ill-advised attempt at top-rope offense by HHH allows Mero to take down the champion with a huracanrana off the second rope. Triple H removes a turnbuckle, but gets Samoan-dropped by Mero, who follows it up with the <b>Beautiful Maneuver</b> (#9) known as the Merosault. Hunter kicks out and tries to ship Mero into the exposed turnbuckle. Mero catches himself and points out the turnbuckle to the referee, allowing Hunter to strike Marc with a foreign object in the confusion. HHH pins Mero to retain the title, and Vince somehow segues into a clip of Jerry Lawler getting eliminated in seconds at the Royal Rumble.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mankind, who is supposed to be in a new tag team with Vader, teams tonight with Faarooq in the main event to take on Ahmed Johnson & The Undertaker in a No Holds Barred Match. In a year and a half’s time, you’ll be able to recreate this match in WWF Warzone for Playstation and Nintendo 64. Faarooq puts a sleeper on Ahmed, but gets clobbered by Undertaker, reminding the Nation leader that there are no DQs. Ahmed chases off the excess Nation members, but in their place come Crush and Savio.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">When Raw comes back from the break, Mankind puts Taker in the mandible claw, which is broken up by Ahmed, who puts Mankind in the Pearl River Plunge, but the pin is interrupted by Faarooq, who hits Ahmed with the Dominator, but the pin is interrupted by the Undertaker. The “everybody does his finisher” sequence ends before Taker can execute a Tombstone. Savio and and Crush, I must say, have been very well-behaved, considering that there are no disqualifications and they haven’t just beaten Ahmed the whole time. Nonetheless, Ahmed and his wedgie rough up Faarooq’s mooks, then chase Assad to the back with a 2x4, leaving Mankind and Taker in the ring. Vader comes to the ring and “accidentally” hits Mankind with a chair but gets tossed out by Taker, who Tombstones Mankind for the victory, just in the nick of time as this taped edition of Raw goes off the air.</span></td> </tr>
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">9 Maneuvers (Year total: 20)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">1 Ahmed wedgie</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-90188745669704686592015-04-14T17:00:00.000-04:002015-04-14T17:00:06.434-04:00Raw #195 - January 27th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
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</span></td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Ahmed Johnson, who this past Saturday was betrayed by Savio Vega, opens up Raw. Thanks to an editing error, an off-camera Vince McMahon introduces footage of the Madison Square Garden event but gets talked over by none other than Vince McMahon, who now appears on camera to introduce tonight’s show and the Spanish announce team. Only then does the MSG footage air. With Crush and Savio Vega representing Hawaii and Puerto Rico, respectively, all Faarooq needs is Nation members from the U.S. Virgin Islands, American Samoa, and Guam. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The announcers debate the effectiveness of Crush’s heart punch in comparison to Ahmed’s kicks. Ahmed jumps up for a wild elbow drop but Crush dodges, then delivers his signature ground attack, using his famed technical prowess to sap Ahmed’s strength. Faarooq is seen peeking from behind the RAW sign before the commercial break.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Ahmed rallies after Raw returns, intercepting one of Crush’s patented aerial attacks with a dropkick. However, Faarooq roughs up Ahmed outside the ring while the referee is distracted, allowing Crush to put Ahmed away with the Heart Punch. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A commercial airs for Thursday Raw Thursday Live, a two-hour Raw special taking place on what Stone Cold says is his favorite night of the week. It must be because of NBC’s Must See TV; Austin loves Suddenly Susan, and that’s the bottom line! Advertised for the show is WWF champion Shawn Michaels defending his title against Sycho Sid in a match that won’t actually happen… but more on that in a moment.</span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"></span><br />
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Shawn Michaels struts into the ring on his healthy legs for an interview with Vince McMahon, Shawn claims he’s giving Sid a title shot to return the favor, as Sid had given him a shot at the Royal Rumble. The coming weeks will show how sincere Shawn is about returning favors as far as Bret Hart is concerned. Shawn talks about the bad attitudes going around the WWF, and if he has to be bad to stay on top, he’ll be bad, too. Vince brings out Bret, the first of four men to compete for the Wrestlemania title shot at next month’s In Your House. Bret tells Shawn he’s the one he wants to beat for the title, and he doesn’t want any excuses or for Michaels to injure himself. Whoops! Next out is The Undertaker, who says he’s tired of hearing about how Bret has been screwed, citing Taker’s own match with Bret at last year’s Royal Rumble, where Diesel cost him the title. Taker wants to face Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania — a match that won’t happen for twelve years. Vince comments that “a number of individuals” have ignored the possibility of Sid having the title by Mania. Next out is Stone Cold, whom Lawler gleefully claims likes to park in handicapped parking spaces. What a bad ass! Jim Ross holds the mic for Austin, who stays in the aisle to cut his promo. Two fat silhouettes loom in the background, but Vader and Paul Bearer never get a chance to speak.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The British Bulldog, escorted to the ring by Clarence Mason, Owen Hart, and Owen’s Slammy, faces Doug Furnas in singles action. Lawler compares Furnas to Reggie White running through the Patriots the night before, one of many football references King makes tonight. Another attempt at a charge sends Furnas bouncing over the top rope and to the floor. Bulldog picks up the ring steps and drops them on Furnas right in front of the referee, who, just like at the Goldust-HHH match at the Rumble, does not call for a disqualification.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">During the break, Ahmed Johnson tore up the backstage area with a 2x4 looking for the Nation. Jerry Lawler thinks the Nation is setting a trap for Johnson. Bulldog remains in control after the break, which is no surprise, considering that he dropped steel steps right onto Furnas. Doug reverses a piledriver attempt with a back body drop, but Bulldog soon goes back on the offensive with a suplex. A dropikick and a belly-to-belly put Furnas in control until Davey Boy counters his Frankensteiner with a <b>Maneuver</b> (#1 - powerbomb). “That could do it!” says Vince. “And it — no, it does. Yes. No? It didn’t!” Jerry Lawler steps in to clarify this convoluted exchange between Vince McMahon and, uh, Vince McMahon: “No, he didn’t!” Meanwhile, Owen lies in wait with his Slammy to strike Furnas, so naturally, Phil LaFon jumps onto the apron, distracting the referee while trying to draw his attention to the cheating. Owen accidentally strikes Bulldog with the Slammy, allowing Furnas to roll up Bulldog. Once again, Vince thinks the match is over, and Lawler has to correct him. Furnas knocks Owen off the apron, then sunset flips Bulldog, who counters with the Summerslam 1992 finish for the victory. Davey Boy is upset at Owen and Clarence Mason nonetheless. “Bulldog” chants emerge as a face turn is hinted at. The camera zooms in on Owen’s Slammy, which tips over on the mat; Vince thinks it’s an omen.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Once again, we see footage of the Ahmed-Savio vs. Faarooq-Crush tag team match from MSG, where Ahmed hit a<b> Devastating Maneuver</b> (#2 - spinebuster) on the leader of the Nation before delivering the same to Crush, then getting his neck pulled down over the top rope by his own partner. Later that night on Shotgun, Savio cemented his heel turn by ganging up on Rocky Maivia with the other members of the Nation. Of course, by years’ end, both Savio and Crush would be kicked out of the Nation, and Ahmed and Rocky would join it.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Paul Bearer accompanies his clients Mankind and Vader to the ring for a match against the Godwinns. But before we get to see that match, Dok Hendrix tries to convince us to pay to call the Superstar Line to find out what Sid’s secret weapon will be on Thursday Raw Thursday (in a match that, again, will not end up taking place).</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Next, we see footage from a press conference held at Toronto’s Sky Dome to announce the signing of a second-generation wrestler. Don’t get too excited, though. It’s just Tiger Ali Singh. Vince then considers aloud whether to sign La Femme Nikita while sticking it to Ted Turner’s inferior Robin Hood series.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Next week’s Raw will feature this year’s Royal Rumble match, plus matches from the Sky Dome. The Godwinns, regulars on Shotgun Saturday Night, trade punches with Vader and Mankind for basically the whole match. Vader hugs Mankind’s legs to prevent Phineas from suplexing him, then yank PIG over the top rope the hard way. A brawl then breaks out on the outside as Raw goes to commercial.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Henry Godwinn gets the hot tag, hitting clotheslines on his opponents, to which Vince urges the fans to “forget about it!” Okay, Vince. Anyway, Henry Godwinn is in the ring somehow, even though I don’t remember how he got there, but is knocked out of the ring. Mankind very slowly approaches Henry, who is restrained by Vader, with a steel chair. HOG dodges the chair shot, which Mankind delivers a few seconds later to his own partner. Mankind does not seem upset, and the announcers speculate whether he could have stopped the chair shot. The Godwinns win by countout over the team that will get title shots at Wrestlemania. In the parking lot, Ahmed swings a 2x4 at one of PG-13, then stuffs him into the trunk of the car. This is not a particularly effective tactic, however, as the car belongs to the Nation, who drive away with the rapper safely in tow.</span></td> <td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA8K2na4E0KEQSzTuXwJooKHJbyylg5Lt5jjOmmhRu8bWXkU1lNOUrjUkFUOXuiVBGSBIOe-7QCsLOL5smcWuE6dwC9auZyHWm4tLTMPjLvGzGq39mD5MfrnnIRcCMXJf-uhYwcPqJ8A0/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-08+at+3.13.40+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjA8K2na4E0KEQSzTuXwJooKHJbyylg5Lt5jjOmmhRu8bWXkU1lNOUrjUkFUOXuiVBGSBIOe-7QCsLOL5smcWuE6dwC9auZyHWm4tLTMPjLvGzGq39mD5MfrnnIRcCMXJf-uhYwcPqJ8A0/s1600/Screen+Shot+2015-04-08+at+3.13.40+PM.png" height="151" width="200" /></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"> </span> <span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally: </span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Maneuvers (Year total: 11)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-84336276207388122142015-03-17T17:00:00.000-04:002015-03-18T19:00:01.558-04:00Raw #194 - January 20th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It’s the night after the Royal Rumble, and Bret Hart interrupts the proceedings, storming to the ring to cut a promo instead of wrestle to open the show. It’s a harbinger of how Raw will operate for the next two decades, except for the fact that Bret repeatedly refers to the “championship belt.” He addresses Vince McMahon as if he, rather than Federation President Gorilla Monsoon, runs the show, airing his grievances about being repeatedly screwed, first by Shawn Michaels in December, and again by Stone Cold at the Royal Rumble, which he would have won had the referees seen Austin get eliminated. Instead, Austin won last night, and Bret Hart unceremoniously quits tonight, hopping the guard rail to a mixture of boos and “We Want Bret” chants. </span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Austin then grabs the mic and paces around cutting a promo that no one can hear because the mic isn’t working, probably because Hart threw it down. Austin threatens to whoop the ringside attendant’s ass as he hands him a working microphone. Stone Cold says Bret has done nothing but whine since he returned to the WWF, drawing cheers. Austin is angry about Sycho Sid (the loser of last night’s title match) being pulled from tonight’s advertised main event due to a concussion and being replaced by the Undertaker in the match against Rumble winner Austin. Curiously, Steve blames Gorilla Monsoon for this decision, even though Bret pretty much spelled out that Vince is the one who’s really in charge. Vince leaves ringside as Jerry Lawler is audibly excited over the prospect of no Bret hart and no Vince in the WWF anymore.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Furnas & LaFon wrestle a a non-title match against the tag team champions Owen Hart and British Bulldog, whom Owen “accidentally” eliminated last night. Davey Boy claimed last night that he would win the Rumble because he was “bizarre,” puzzling fans for decades to come, as not only is Bulldog not bizarre, but bizarreness is not an important factor in winning a Royal Rumble. Then again, if Bulldog’s claiming against all evidence to be bizarre, and he thinks being bizarre will help him win the 30-man battle royal, then I guess he is pretty bizarre after all. Jerry Lawler urges fans to call their friends to get them to watch Raw tonight. Jim Ross informs us that Gorilla Monsoon fined The Undertaker his entire Royal Rumble purse after chokeslamming a referee last night. Leave it to Monsoon to go after a wrestler’s share of the purse money. That’ll give Undertaker a real negative attitude! </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jim Ross plugs La Femme Nikita on USA, which he promises will have back-to-back episodes after Raw and will not be a bait-and-switch, no doubt referring to something that happened on Nitro recently. The announcers also extol the superiority of Nikita over Robin Hood, but more on that later in the broadcast. Jerry Lawler is still talking about Vince leaving the set, saying he’d never seen Vince look so white. I guess he never saw Vince dance at the 1987 Slammy Awards. Following an Owen belly-to-belly, Jim Ross calls Hart a “suplex machine.” Somewhere in Philadelphia, Taz is vowing to beat up Jim Ross as soon as his first push in the WWF fizzles out. A top-rope headbutt misses Furnas, leading to tags by both teams. LaFon hits a spinning DDT that clearly fails to drop Davey Boy on his head, so JR covers for him and calls it an armbar takedown. Owen hits LaFon with his Slammy, allowing Bulldog to powerslam his opponent for the victory. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We see a replay of Shawn Michaels’s whole entrance from last night’s Royal Rumble to get everybody jazzed up about Shawn being champion again, no one realizing that Shawn wouldn’t even make it to the next pay-per-view.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Nation of Domination, consisting of Faarooq, Crush, Clarence Mason, PG-13, an unknown D’Lo Brown, and several actors, enters the ring. Conspicuous by his absence is, uh, one of the Nation members. You know, the black guy. He took a Pearl River Plunge through a table last night. Faarooq’s opponent tonight is fellow Sunny protege Bart Gunn. JR again mentions Robin Hood, assuring us that we won’t have to sit through Robin Hood to see tonight’s main event. That’s because last week’s Nitro saw the Hogan-Giant main event air during the commercial breaks of TNT’s new Adventures of Robin Hood TV series following the main program. Faarooq dominates the match until Bart Gunn makes his comeback, only for a PG-13 member to put Faarooq’s foot on the rope. Crush roughs up Gunn on the outside and falls prey to the Dominator (formerly the Tiger’s Bite), allowing Faarooq to make the pin. Vince and Gorilla (who shields his eyes from the bright lights) come to ringside after the match for a “major announcement.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince introduces Gorilla Monsoon, and the fans boo. Pandemonium nearly breaks loose. Monsoon refuses to change the referee’s decision from the Rumble match, but denies Austin the title match at Wrestlemania. Instead, he makes a four-man elimination match at In Your House between Undertaker, Vader, Bret Hart (all of whom were illegally eliminated by Stone Cold), and Austin himself. This match is “very unique” says Monsoon twice throughout his speech. Stone Cold rushes down to the ring and calls Gorilla a jackass. Austin is having some numerical difficulties tonight, not only claiming to have thrown 29 wrestlers over the top rope the night before (which would have set an all-time Rumble record), but that he’s going to beat “them four” at In Your House, a number which includes himself. He then gets in Monsoon’s face. Boy, is he bent out of shape! Bret Hart then comes back through the crowd, grabs the mic, and accepts Monsoon’s offer for a spot in the match, then brawls with Austin in the aisle.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince is back on commentary as Bret Hart is escorted away after the commercial break. Undertaker makes his entrance, but interrupts it to brawl with Bret in the aisle before setting his sights on Austin. Jerry Lawler yells at Austin to target Undertaker’s injured rings, prompting Vince to admonish him. “Stop it.” Jerry Lawler does not. Instead, The King gets out of his chair and continues shouting instructions. Taker mule-kicks Austin in the groin, but Austin hits a stunner, leading to a double-down. It’s funny to see the Stone cold Stunner used as a transition move. Backstage, Bret gets the hat trick, brawling with his third opponent at In Your house, Vader, before the two are separated by a number of wrestlers, including Rod Price, who lost to Rocky Maivia in a match taped prior to tonight’s show.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">During the break, the two wrestlers had another double-down, this time with the dreaded simultaneous clothesline, although Austin is in control when the show returns. JR reminds us once again about the two episodes of La Femme Nikita coming up next, and, again, how her arms are bigger than Robin Hood’s. Vader then waddles down to ringside to battle his two other opponents, meaning that all four men in the In Your House main event have brawled with each other tonight. All four men punch each other a lot. Then Austin leaves, but Bret runs up the aisle so they can punch each other some more. Then they punch each other at ringside.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">0 Maneuvers (Year total: 9)</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-29231350322106263842015-02-03T17:00:00.000-05:002015-02-03T17:00:14.944-05:00Raw #193 - January 13th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
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</span></td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">This week’s Raw may be taped, but Shawn Michaels is live from San Antonio, where he signs autographs for fans such as Double J Jesse Jammes, his future DX colleague (and by “future,” I mean 2012’s “Raw 1000” episode, the first time the two were in the stable at the same time). Bret Hart’s chances of winning this Sunday’s Royal Rumble just dropped drastically after Steve Austin Pillmanized his ankle on Superstars. Speaking of agony, the Honky Tonk Man is on commentary with Vince, filling in for his cousin Jerry Lawler, who teams with HHH against Goldust and Marc Mero.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">During the entrances, a sign suggests that “nWo” stands for “not worth observing.” Observing? Even for today’s WWE announcers, that’s an awkward vocabulary choice. I wonder what Cole, Lawler, and JBL would think if they had witnessed what just transpired! Goldust and Hunter Hearst Helmsley have no contact during the opening minutes, but when Goldust finally tags in to face the Blue Blood, Hunter flees under the bottom rope, trying to tag in Jerry Lawler. He misses, but the referee claims he saw a tag anyway. Honky Tonk Man picks up the slack left by Jerry Lawler on commentary, squeezing in a topical reference by saying that Hunter will keep his cool against Goldust at the Rumble like OJ Simpson on the witness stand in his recent civil trial. Vince announces that the Royal Rumble winner will face the title match’s loser next week on Raw. Hearing how bad it sounds to describe a wrestler as a “loser” when hyping a future match, Vince would insist in 2014 that announcers avoid that word when talking about how the loser of the Cena-Ambrose pole match would face Randy Orton at Hell in a Cell. Hunter continues to dodge Goldust, stepping off the apron when Lawler tries to tag. However, once Jerry has Goldust tied up, Hunter steps in for an attempt at a cheap shot, but ends up punching the King by accident. Later, Lawler uses a concealed foreign object to punch Mero before the commercial break.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Wildman Marc Mero turns the match around for his team by hitting a <b>Tremendous Maneuver</b> (#1 - flying headscissors) on Helmsley. Honky Tonk disagrees with McMahon, stating it was merely a “very good maneuver,” but admitting that if Helmsley had landed on his head, it would have been “devastating.” Goldust finally gets the tag and goes ape on Hunter, even uppercutting him in his “prominent proboscis.” Hunter ends up tied in the ropes, allowing Goldust to choke him. The referee disqualifies Goldust’s team, leading to the Bizarre One and the Wild Man exchanging blows after the match. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">In a promo taped earlier today in an empty Alamodome, Sid quotes Nietzche about becoming a monster when fighting monsters. He doesn’t identify the German philosopher by name, probably because he can’t pronounce it. He says that when he faces Shawn Michaels, José Lothario will “summon all the Mexicans from Mexico” and they will see Sid destroy Michaels. Shawn, who speaks live from San Antonio, says that he is “all man and at least a yard wide, if you know what I’m talking about!” We do know what he’s talking about: his penis. However, the man standing on the right of the screen may not know what he’s talking about, as he excitedly cheers “woo!” after the innuendo. HBK then casually refers to Sid as “Stalin” for claiming to be the master and ruler of the world. Nobody can “work his ass into the ground” like himself, says Michaels, creating quite the mental image. What exactly is he doing that requires him to work his ass into the ground? Some kind of cruel prison labor where he has to dig holes not with a shovel but with his own butt?</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret Hart, who was Pillmanized on the Superstars episode that aired yesterday, limps to the ring for commentary, no doubt puzzling the fans in attendance, who saw him earlier in the taping walking quite normally. Apparently, it was such a <b>Devastating Maneuver</b> (#2) that Hart got injured retroactively. British Bulldog, who cost Austin a match to two jobbers two weeks ago on Superstars, faces Rocky Maivia, who shows more promise, says Bret, than any wrestler he’s ever seen. This weekend on Shotgun Saturday Night, Rocky made the save for Sable when she found herself in the ring with the Honky Tonk Man, leading to a brawl between Rocky and Marc Mero. Rocky takes control with what Vince calls a “patented arm drag takedown.” Who would have thought that within three years, these two would be on opposite sides of a Dog Poop match? Not Rocky and Vince; Rocky and Bulldog. No, Rocky and Vince would within four years be on opposite sides of a “Kiss My Ass” match. Bulldog steps outside for a breather after having a tough time with Maivia. Owen Hart then walks to ringside with his Slammy Award (obviously) and sets himself in front of the announce table to keep Bret from interfering in the match.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Rocky scores a two-count with a sunset flip as Raw returns from break. Bulldog takes control after the kickout until he gets into a slugfest with Rocky, whose stupid arm movements really add power to his punches. Maivia body-presses Bulldog and himself over the top rope, where Austin sneak-attacks Davey Boy with a chop-block. Austin is then chased by a hobbling Bret, who is followed by Owen. Meanwhile, Rocky rolls into the ring to pick up a countout win. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Backstage, Faarooq assures Vince that the Nation of Domination will be unified in the Royal Rumble match, while Crush promises to dominate the Undertaker “by any means necessary.” This will be Crush’s first confrontation with the Undertaker since 1996’s Bollywood film, <i>Khiladiyon Ka Khiladi</i>, and even then, it was just Brian Lee dressed as Taker. The real Undertaker cold-cocks Crush before the bell. Vince describes how fearsome Crush is, using the word “individual” twice but noting that he hates to be called, “jailbird.” Undertaker attempts School (soon to be known as “Old School”), but Faarooq shakes the ropes, knocking the Dead Man onto his cold cock. However, Taker recovers and dumps Crush over the top rope with a fireman’s carry, a <b>Nice Maneuver </b>(#3). Crush fights right back by snapping Undertaker’s neck over the rope with a<b> Clever Maneuver</b> (#4). Crush’s manager, Clarence Mason, according to Honky Tonk Man, has just been to Oakland, where he showed his support for Ebonics. Crush hits one of his patented crappy piledrivers to ground Taker. Vader peeks through the “Raw sign as the show goes to break.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Crush is in control until he misses a fist drop. Undertaker scores with a flying clothesline but fails to hit the Tombstone, which Crush wriggles out of. The Jailbird then attempts the dreaded heart punch, but the Undertaker ducks. Crush then takes the worst chokeslam until Hulk Hogan in 2002. The Nation then runs in, drawing a DQ. Vader, Taker’s Rumble opponent, also joins in and Vader-Bombs him twice before Ahmed rushes in with a 2x4. Johnson, the first former champion in WWF history to ever use a 2x4 as a weapon, soon gets beaten down by the Nation as Raw goes off the air.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</span> <br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Maneuvers (Year total: 9)</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">8 Individuals</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-80827768470422967302015-01-20T21:50:00.001-05:002015-01-20T21:50:29.874-05:00Raw #192 - January 6th, 1997<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Tonight’s Raw is rated TV PG. Therefore, it must suck. Tonight’s topics include whether Bret Hart is the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be (which will be debated by Hart and Vader) and Marlena’s breasts, which she flashed at the Sultan on the premiere of Shotgun Saturday Night. Shocking, I know. I had forgotten The Sultan was even in the WWF. </span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Owen Hart, along with Slammy-bearer Clarence Mason, takes on Mankind in a heel vs. heel “tough guy match-up.” I’m not sure why Owen had been selected for a match designed for brawlers like Vader or Mankind or Steve Austin, but I guess the “tough man” match is just a term they use whenever they have two heels wrestle each other in the opening match. Vince informs us that Sid will be interviewed tonight, “notwithstanding” the Hart vs. Vader match. Owen tries to lock in the sharpshooter in the opening moments of the match, which Mankind breaks by grabbing the ropes. Supposedly, the rules have been relaxed for this match, despite the rope break. Mankind jumps on Owen’s back and takes him down for a mandible claw from the rear. That’s from the rear, not to the rear. Owen bites Mankind’s fingers to counter, a move that I imagine would be illegal under normal rules (whereas sticking one’s finger’s down an opponents throat would not be). Owen goes to the outside, gordbusters Mankind onto the guard rail, and whips his opponent with the tag team title belt. In reference to the upcoming Shawn Michaels appearance, Jerry says that José Lothario’s arteries are clogged with refried beans, despite the common knowledge that beans are good for your heart. Owen Hart knocks down Mankind, who is on his knees, with a spinning heel kick and later knocks him to the outside with an enziguiri. Mankind responds by clocking Owen with a plastic tub. He’s hardcore! He’s hardcore!</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Mankind hits a neckbreaker, but a Owen rolls through a second neckbreaker attempt to execute a DDT. Mankind catches Owen with the mandible claw after an attempted aerial move, but Owen counters with a <b>Brilliant Maneuver </b>(#1 - spinning heel kick). Mankind dodges a shoulder charge by Owen, who rams into the ring post, then piledrives Hart and falls on top of him for the win. Backstage, Shawn, José Lothario, and José’s son Pete speak on Shawn’s match with Sid and Sid’s actions against José at Survivor Series. We’ve never seen Pete before; let’s hope nothing bad happens to him tonight. Clips from Shotgun Saturday Night then air, such as the Nation of Domination’s assault on Ahmed, which concluded when Johnson gave D’Lo Brown (the unnamed Nation member) the Pearl River Plunge on top of a car. We also see the unfortunate debut of the Flying Nuns, whom the announcers still refuse to acknowledge are men (The Headbangers, for that matter), but who are advertised for next week’s Shotgun.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince and Jerry are joined by Jerry’s cousin, The Honky Tonk Man, who is scouting this tag team match pitting the Fake Razor and Fake Diesel against Doug Furnas and Philip LaFon, whom Vince “would suggest” are the best tag team in the Federation. Vince praises the team for using “moves that many of us have never seen before.” Well, moves *he* hasn’t seen before, at least. Among those moves is a standing Backlund-like counter to a Razor armbar.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince notes the surprising “effectiveness” of Razor and Diesel as a tag team, having recently beaten the Godwinns. A dropkick to Diesel’s back allows Funas to tag in LaFon for the hot tag. Diesel counters a double-underhook attempt by Lafon, but a Furnas dropkick combined with a LaFon sunset flip almost scores a victory. Furnas tags back in but gets cut off by a Razor Ramon clothesline, an <b>Excellent Maneuver </b>(#2). Furnas counters a Fake Razor’s Edge, hits a Frankensteiner, then takes down Razor with a top-rope Hart Attack with the help of his partner, rolling up Razor for the win with a jackknife pin. After playing clips of last week’s shenanigans where Hunter Heart Helmsley threw Marlena around like a hot potato, Vince announces a tag match next week between the teams of Marc Mero & Goldust and Helmsley & Jerry Lawler. Speaking of Marlena’s hot potatoes, we then see a replay of her flashing the Sultan to provide a distraction and allow Goldust to win on Shotgun. We get a quick word with Bret Hart, who says his opponent Vader is big but not very smart. On a related note, Sid’s music hits.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jim Ross interviews Sid about his match with Shawn Michaels at the Royal Rumble in HBK’s hometown. Sid says that in this ring, you have to “hit or be hitten,” and “kick or be kicken.” Grammar issues aside, Sid uses this excuse to justify hitting José Lothario with a camera last November. Shawn Michaels crashes the interview wearing jacket resembling a bathrobe, which he strips off while dancing on the announce table. Sid looks on delighted in what makes an exceedingly gay animated GIF. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Correction: Two exceedingly gay animated GIFs. Shawn Michaels knows that in the WWF, it’s strip or be strippen. Sid then apologizes, not for what he did at Survivor Series, but for what he’s going to do right now. Sid laughs and leaves the ring while Shawn continues to dance.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">As Bret Hart enters, Shawn says that all Bret did during Shawn’s title reign was knock everything HBK did. Does that include Sunny? Hart faces Vader, who is not represented by Jim Cornette tonight or at the Royal Rumble after Undertaker tombstoned James E. on Superstars the day before. Shawn criticizes Bret’s fashion sense, then accuses Jerry Lawler of stealing jokes. Ridiculous. All Jerry does is look out for number one (and not step in number two!). Shawn then asks Vince who the “they” in “the man they call Vader.” Vince says “they” are the fans. Bret hits an elbow smash off the ring steps onto Vader. Shawn says that unlike Bret, he’s honest about cheating, leading vince to call HBK the most straightforward person there has ever been. Do you think he’ll be saying the same thing next month when Shawn forfeits his title after a mysterious knee injury? Speaking of cheating (rulebreaking, not adultery), Bret continues to work on Vader’s “groin area.” Vince notes that Bret could really use this victory, leading Shawn to ask why anyone would ever need a loss. Vader hits a <b>Devastating Maneuver</b> (#3 - flying body block) on Bret off the top rope. Stone Cold is seen looking on before the commercial break.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vader does another flying body block as Raw returns. Jerry wonders why José Lothario didn’t name his son Hose-B Lothario as Vader squashes Bret with a splash off the second rope. “Forget about it!” says Vince. Forget about what? I don’t remember now. Vader, not having listened to his son Frankie’s advice to apply the Vader Bomb more quickly, takes an eternity setting it up, allowing Bret to get his knees up. Shawn successfully predicts that Bret Hart will do a Russian leg sweep next to show how predictable the Hitman is. Well, he doesn’t so much “predict” it as state the name of the <b>Patented Maneuver</b> (#4) Bret is in the middle of executing. Next, he agrees with Vince that “you know what comes next” because Bret does the same thing every single match. As if hearing HBK’s commentary, Bret scoop-slams the 450-pound Vader. Well, I don’t think any of us saw that one coming. Next, Bret goes right back to the Five Moves of Doom, which, as I’ve said before, I’ve never actually seen done in sequence, hitting an elbow smash followed by another leg sweep for a <b>Clever Maneuver</b> (#5). I’m not sure why tat particular leg sweep was clever, while the other wasn’t, but regardless, Bret then body presses Vader over the top rope, with both men spilling to the outside. Sid then comes to ringside and grabs the camera man, taking him backstage. Stone Cold sneaks to ringside during the confusion and stuns Bret, making him easy prey for a Vader Bomb after he gets tossed back into the ring. Vader pins Bret for the victory. We cut to backstage, where Sid is choking Pete Lothario. He even knocks off his hat like in the music video for “<a href="http://youtu.be/39YUXIKrOFk?t=1m36s">I’m Too Sexy</a>.” Sid then powerbombs Pete onto an apparently Japanese table backstage, which does not break. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">When Raw returns, Shawn is on the scene as well as Bart Gunn, Savio Vega, and Aldo Montoya, about whom I have run out of jokes. Shawn is steaming mad! He’s boiling mad!</span></td> </tr>
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">5 Maneuvers</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Notwithstanding</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Individuals</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">7 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 I Would Suggests</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-70917416556396698612015-01-13T17:00:00.000-05:002015-01-13T17:00:00.508-05:00Raw #191 - December 30th, 1996<table border="0"><tbody>
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</td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It’s the last Raw of 1996, and Bret Hart will go “face-to-face” with Shawn Michaels, who calls himself “the World Wrestling Federation’s favorite degenerate.” The opening match sees Faarooq team up with an “unlikely” partner, according to Vince, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin. What’s so unlikely about the black nationalist teaming up with a white Texan with a shaved head? They are set to take on Savio Vega and Jesse Jammes in an effort to sneak in one last Savio/Austin match in 1996. Also notable is that this episode is live, breaking an eight-month streak of one live Raw per month. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Austin jumps Double J before he can finish singing, “With My Baby Tonight,” leading to Savio joining the fracas on the outside of the ring. Savio and Austin start off the match, with Stone Cold scoring a “kick to the chest-area,” a “hard right hand,” and a “<b>Clever Maneuver</b>,” a stun gun. Vince notes that Jerry Lawler will later tonight face Goldust, who is looking to prove what he is and “what he is not” (gay). Bret Hart looks on backstage, where a monitor gives him what Vince calls “a bird’s eye view.” Note that the monitor shows the same camera angles as the regular feed and not, in fact, an aerial view. Lawler remarks that Austin will “stomp a mudhole in ya and then walk it dry.” Savio then hits a spinning heel kick but is “unable to capitalize on the <b>Maneuver</b> (#2).” Savio’s 1995 King of the Ring opponent Jesse Jammes tags in but is soon tossed over the top rope and chop-blocked by Stone Cold. Bret Hart then runs down the longer-than-usual aisle to check on Jammes. Vince repeatedly expresses his uncertainty as to whether Jammes can continue or that Bret wishes to join the match. You know what I’m talking about: “I’m not so sure Bret Hart doesn’t want to take Double J’s place!”</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Bret Hart has somehow been allowed to sub in for Double J, whose partnership with Vega lasted half a match. This episode of Raw should be titled, “Bad Opponents, Worse Partners.” The heels keep Vega isolated, allowing Jerry Lawler to come up with several alternatives to “kicking Savio’s ass,” such as “rear end” and “butt.” Bret finally gets the hot tag and cleans house, then very slowly applies the Sharpshooter on Faarooq. Crush attacks from behind, leading the whole Nation of Domination and Austin to jump in the ring. Fortunately, Ahmed Johnson runs in wearing clown pants and brandishing a 2x4, causing the heels to retreat. He then cuts an Ahmed promo ending with his new catchphrase, “You’re goin’ down! You’re goin’s down!” Savio and Bret celebrate with Black Doink.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Another Adam and George spot airs before Vince gets visibly flustered by fans in the front row yelling in his face. After all, who wants to have an annoying voice screaming in his ear as he tries to do commentary? Vince continues not to be so sure, this time about Bret Hart being eliminated first in the Rumble due to his status as a marked man.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Flash Funk takes on Hunter Hearst Helmsley in a non-title match. Backstage, Hunter implies that he will have sex with Marlena after the Royal Rumble, to which Vince sternly remarks, “That’s not a nice thing to say, whatsoever.” Goldust and Marlena walk down to their seats in the arena as their theme music plays. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Marlena and Goldust are seen sitting near a group of ECW fans holding bWo signs. “How could they buy a ticket,” says Lawler. “This place has been sold out for months.” The visibly darkened upper deck belies this statement. Flash Funk gets his foot caught by Helmsley, but rather than going for an enziguiri to count, he somersaults and flips Helmsley over for a Very <b>Clever Maneuver </b>(#3). Flash vaults over the top rope into the ring and rolls up Helmsley for a <b>Maneuver</b> (#4) that is “cleverly done.” Amidst ragging on Goldust as not being a “real man,” he suggests that Goldust and Vince both shop at “Toupees ‘R’ Us,” but Vince says that he buys his elsewhere. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince reminds us of the debut of Shotgun Saturday Night this weekend as Helmsley hits a fist drop to Flash Funk’s “facial area.” Jerry Lawler, who faces Goldust later tonight, gets on the mic and calls his opponent a freak and complains that he is distracting Helmsley. Jerry tries to climb over the guardrail, distracting the referee and allowing HHH to hit Funk with what Vince shockingly calls a “championship belt.” Goldust then steps over the barricade and stares down Lawler up the aisle. Helmsley tries to sneak-attack Goldust, but Flash Funk cuts him off and brings him back to the ring without Goldust even noticing. Funk hits the 450 splash to get his revenge.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">“This capacity crowd awaiting one Shawn Michaels,” says Vince, never explaining how many Shawn Michaelses the fans could possibly be awaiting otherwise. He does, however, explain the many reasons why people might not like Shawn Michaels, such as his long hair (which no other wrestler has, apparently), the fact that “the chicks dig him,” or that he has a pierced navel, but you can’t deny the heart he gives it his all in the ring. Both Shawn and Bret are in the ring together, but the bigger story is the fan walking back and forth with the “Sincere Rules” sign. Shawn sarcastically calls himself a “degenerate” again and Bret Hart “The Almighty One.” Bret Hart’s mic keeps cutting out, possibly because he keeps talking about the “belt.” He says HBK scraped the bottom of the barrel when he posed for Playgirl, which Bret doubts that girls even buy. Ross lends the Hitman his working microphone to allow him to continue his tirade about Michaels degrading the belt. Bret vows to kick Shawn’s ass when they wrestle each other again, which presumably will be at Wrestlemania, unless Shawn has some kind of unfortunate career-threatening knee injury between winning the title back and Mania. Shawn says that he’s seen Bret on the road and he isn’t any kind of role model (probably because of all the adulterous sex he has). Sid then comes to the ring uninvited and gets tossed the mic by HBK, catching it like a fly ball. Sid says he wants real competition after having beaten both Shawn and Bret. The Undertaker’s bell tolls, and the Dead Man saunters to the ring until his Rumble opponent Vader attacks him from behind. Shawn then crotches Bret Hart on the second rope as Hitman tries to leave the ring, then dives onto Sid as we cut to commercial. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Honky Tonk Man is on commentary — and television — for no good reason. Also at the desk is Hunter Hearst Helmsley, who awaits the arrival of his Rumble opponent, Goldust. The match against Jerry Lawler, who holds up a fan’s “Lawler Rules” sign before the commercial, begins during the subsequent break. Honky claims to be seeking a new talent who will carry on his legacy as the greatest Intercontinental Champion of all time. Hunter says he could be that man. Yes, eighteen years ago, Triple H sought the approval of the Honky Tonk Man. Hunter then picks up Marlena, literally, and tries to carry her backstage but gets cut off by Marc Mero. As Goldust chases after him, Hunter tosses Marlena to Mero, then pushes Goldust into the two of them. Goldust either gets counted out or picks up the win via disqualification as Hunter beats him down. vince explains that Lawler has, indeed, won the match as Raw signs off.</span></td> </tr>
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Maneuvers (Final 1996 total: 206)</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3 Individuals</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">9 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 I’m Not So Sures</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-22237894469097751332014-12-29T20:31:00.001-05:002014-12-30T10:35:39.810-05:00Raw #190 - December 23rd, 1996<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The last Raw before Christmas kicks off with an Intercontinental Title match between Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Wildman Marc Mero. This is possibly Mero’s last title shot against the Blue Blood, but the stipulations state that if Hunter is DQ’ed or counted out, he will lose the title. Lex Luger should have gotten Mero’s lawyer back at Summerslam ’93. Also arriving on the scene are Goldust and Marlena, who sit down among the fans after, as Vince put it, walking through the “thongs.” I think he means, “throngs.” Goldust faces the winner at the Royal Rumble.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mero gets off to a good start, taking down Hunter with a pair of Japanese arm drags, which Vince resists the urge to call “Mexican arm drags” as he is wont to do. Mero chases off Jerry Lawler for being a sore loser at last week’s Karate Fighters title fight, allowing Helmsley an opportunity to hit the Wildman with a chair. However, with the title able to change hands on a DQ, Hunter changes his mind. Back in the ring, Helmsley pulls Mero to the floor through the ropes with a <b>Clever Maneuver</b>. Jim Ross mentions that The Honky Tonk Man for some unfathomable reason is going to join the announce team later in the show. Wildman hits a sunset flip, which HHH escapes with “a kickout of sorts.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Hunter drops his knee somewhere in the vicinity of Mero’s head after taunting Goldust, who sits among the G-strings — uh, thongs — uh, throngs of fans. Mero hits a <b>Maneuver </b>(#2) in the form of a flying head scissors, then kicks Helmsley in the “chest-area” before hitting a <b>High-Risk Maneuver</b> (#3 - front dropkick off the top rope). A Batusi later, and Mero attempts a Merosault from the top rope but misses, allowing Helmsley to hit the Pedigree for the win. “Nobody gets up from the Pedigree,” says Ross, ignoring the time Freddie Joe Floyd did just that a few months prior. “You make one mistake against a great athlete like Helmsley and you get Pedigreed right out of your boots!” One has to wonder what other athletes will Pedigree you out of your boots aside from Helmsley. A distraught Mero has to be separated from Helmsley by officials, leading Vince to assure the audience that the Wildman will get another title shot one day, nullifying much of the hype behind this match, just as he did when he claimed that Lex Luger would get a rematch against Yokozuna right after he blew his one and only title shot at Summerslam 1993. Helmsley grabs the mic and addresses Goldust, saying that at the Rumble, he’ll show Goldust “what it’s like to be a real man.” I shudder to think what he means by that, but he goes on to tell Marlena that he’ll show her “what it’s like to *be* with a real man.” See, he was putting the emphasis on “be;” he should hit “with” more. “To be *with* a real man!” Goldust ditches his wig and tries to chase Hunter, who flees backstage. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We see a replay of Billy’s kayfabe injury from last week. Supposedly, Billy Gunn is still temporarily paralyzed with no use of his legs. You’d think they would have gone for the “paraplegic” angle after <a href="http://www.wrestlecrap.com/icfyt/it-came-from-youtube-sione-nearly-cripples-billy-gunn/">Sionne nearly Tombstoned him right on his head</a> on an episode of Superstars the previous year.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sunny struts to the ring in a Santa cap, yielding four separate, “Oh my goodnesses” from Vince McMahon. Rocky Maivia, about whom Sunny has been figuratively gushing for weeks, is in action against Salvatore Sincere. But first, another Christmas carol from the WWF’s choir! And it’s about Sycho Sid again! These guys should sing his theme song. We also see behind-the-scenes clips of Sunny filling in for Jenny McCarthy and hosting MTV’s “Singled Out.” Sunny’s hit some rough patches as of late in the 2010s, but at least she isn’t partly responsible for a resurgence of measles, mumps, and rubella in the United States. Bob Backlund is there too for some reason. Maivia, who is “quite the formidable individual,” is slated to enter the Royal Rumble. No word on whether he will appear on the new Shotgun Saturday Night program airing late night next weekend. Rocky leapfrogs Sincere with a <b>Nice Maneuver </b>(#4) and later hits a tomahawk chop off the top rope before Salvatore executes his own <b>Clever Maneuver</b> (#5) by floating over Maivia in the corner and then hits a sort of clothesline/Zig-Zag, a <b>Nice Maneuver</b> (#6) that Vince calls a “reverse bulldog.” Vince, having read the Monsoon Commentary Manual, then notes the “look of concern on the kisser of Jim Cornette.” Rocky regains his momentum and “decks” Sincere, not with boughs of holly, but with a punch after a series of stupid arm waves he feels he needs in order to get over as a babyface. Rocky wins with a shoulderbreaker.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Superfans Adam and George are still in the Alamo Dome, this time finding themselves in the men’s room.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sycho Sid comes to the ring for an interview with Vince, bumping fists with fans along the way. Sid gets a loud but mixed reaction, like the star player of a visiting softball team. Vince speaks a lot about “attitude,” which all of the top contenders for the title have. Sid cuts a Sid promo, whispering and shouting about being the master and the ruler of the world while his music plays in the background. Sid notes that he is 6’9” and 300 pounds, and he will be 6’9” and 300 pounds tomorrow and the day after and the day after. His point is, I suppose, that he is watching his weight.</span></td> <td><br />
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A promo airs for Shotgun Saturday Night, which the narrator describes as a “smokin’, sexy, rockin’ good time.” That narrator, however, is Todd Pettengill, so take his idea of “smokin’,” “sexy,” and “rockin’” with a grain of salt. At least the Federation found another use for all that footage from the short-lived new intro of Raw from last year.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Pierroth and Cibernético step into the ring to 1) compete with WCW’s cruiserweight division, and 2) introduce the fans to the hordes of ringers the Federation will be padding out the Royal Rumble with next month. Those ringers include 55-year-old Mil Máscaras who does commentary at ringside. Pierroth attempts to leapfrog his opponent, Leif Cassidy, who doesn’t duck far enough and ends up headbutting the luchador in the groin. Cibernético and Marty Jannetty tag in, prompting the announcers to note that neither team is popular among their respective audiences. Vince notes that Pierroth and Cibernético are not “high-fliers,” unlike many other Mexican wrestlers. Like, say, the ones in WCW. Maybe Vince booked these guys against the New Rockers thinking that they were, and now a week removed from seeing them wrestle at the Raw taping, he has learned the error of his ways.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Pierroth powerbombs Jannetty, then leaps, or rather drops, from the top rope with a splash for the victory. The New Rockers argue with each other after the bell. Mil Máscaras, wearing one of his thousand masks (this one apparently based on Racer X from the Speed Racer cartoon), speaks with Jim Ross. We then see a number of entrants into the Royal Rumble, including Undertaker, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, and Ahmed Johnson, all of whom will be in singles matches earlier on the card. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Honky Tonk Man inexplicably returns to the WWF and takes a seat at the announcers’ table. Bret Hart wrestles a Razor Ramon impersonator while an Elvis impersonator does commentary. Geez, and you thought 1995 was bad when the Hitman was battling dentists and pirates. Bret will appear this Thursday at the Rosemont Horizon, site of this year’s “Russellmania,” the WWF’s annual celebration of basketball legend Bill Russell. The Honky Tonk Man explains that he is in the WWF to find the next great superstar like himself who can wrestle, sing, and play guitar. Too bad he’s not looking for a tag team; Jesse James and Man Mountain Rock could do the trick under those criteria. Bret aggressively punches Razor in the corner, leading Vince to say he wouldn’t be surprised if the Hitman were “not disqualified.” As always, McMahon means to say that he wouldn’t be surprised if Hitman *were* disqualified. Vince references Bret’s new bad attitude, in contrast to Shawn Michaels, who refuses to make excuses. This is the same Shawn Michaels who will forfeit the title in less than two months after “losing his smile” and suffering a phantom knee injury. Bret brawls with Razor on the outside as Raw goes to break. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret hits the bulldog on Razor as Raw returns, then hits an elbow smash and clamps on the sharpshooter, completing the Five Moves of Doom (except for the first two). Hart picks up the one-sided victory. Backstage, an annoyed Michaels speaks with Vince over the headset. Michaels lectures us some more about not giving any excuses and says he’s going to win at the Royal Rumble.</span></td> </tr>
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<h2>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">6 Maneuvers</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">13 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-34151171546926327112014-12-16T17:00:00.000-05:002014-12-16T17:00:05.567-05:00Raw #189 - December 16th, 1996<table border="0"><tbody>
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</td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It’s the night after In Your House and, for what I believe is the first time in history, Raw opens with an in-ring interview rather than an actual match. Vince acts as if this wasn’t written in the program, but JR acts like he’s known about it all along and steps into the ring with a microphone. Hart complains that things have changed in the WWF, that he can’t tell his enemies from his friends, and that there are no rules in the WWF anymore. He says he’s not going to follow the rules anymore, either and puts Sid, Steve Austin, and Shawn Michaels on notice, calling HBK, “you little prissy.” It’s not the Attitude Era just yet, so he’ll have to settle with “prissy” for now. Bret announces that he will enter the Royal Rumble, then comes to the announcers’ desk for commentary.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vader comes to the ring for another “tough man contest,” which again involves Steve Austin. Austin takes exception to Bret being at ringside, as does Jerry Lawler, even though the Hitman promises to mind his own business. Vince calls the two opponents in the ring, “consummate professionals.” That’s Vader, who assaulted 58-year-old President Gorilla Monsoon on his first night and later broke Yokozuna’s leg on purpose, versus Steve Austin, who constantly swears and who a month and a half ago broke into another wrestler’s house to interrupt a live interview. I guess Bret does have a point about there being no rules anymore. Austin topples Vader with a Lou Thesz press, then stomps him to the outside. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vader hits his side-arm punches on Steve Austin, whom Vince erroneously calls, “Still Cold” Steve Austin. Stone Cold hits Vader with a low blow as he sets up for the Vader Bomb, but no disqualification is called because this is a tough man contest. Bret Hart then chop-blocks Austin on the outside and puts him in the sharpshooter, drawing a disqualification. Vader then brawls with Hart over costing him the match. After being separated from Vader by officials, Hart goes back to Austin to put on the sharpshooter again. Vince repeatedly calls Austin, “bitter.” Hart gets cheered. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Footage airs of last night’s interview with Ahmed, wherein the leader of the Nation of Domination called Johnson an “Uncle Tom.” No mention is made tonight, nor was any mention made last night, of the fact that Crush is now a member of the Nation.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Fake Razor and Fake Diesel take on the Godwinns. “Razor” hands his chains over to Tony Chimel and threatens him if he doesn’t take care of them. Fake Razor gets clotheslined over the top rope by Fake Henry Godwinn (better known as Phineas), who then falls victim to a Godwinn double-team where HOG body-slams PIG onto the Bad Guy. The announcers note the absence of Hillbilly Jim. A loud “Henry” chant is heard while Diesel dominates the hog farmer, encouraging his comeback. Jim Ross praises the high-impact action, noting that the WWF doesn’t need clowns, plumbers, garbagemen, or pig farmers. That last one may have been a Freudian slip. Herny hits the Slop Drop on Razor, but with the referee distracted, Diesel hits the jackknife (after much effort) on Phineas, whom Razor covers for the win. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Vince has a word with Sid, who is confident he will beat Shawn Michaels at the Alamo Dome at the Royal Rumble. Shawn Michaels is on hand to rebut Sid’s promo. Shawn again says that he’s not going to whine about losing the match to Sid like Bret Hart, but he does begrudge the big man for messing with José Lothario. He also brags about living his life “openly.”</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC0FdYKOgDSiQaQGFg1moAVIyIEncyh9yuCN-UXeusVK_7TDnWX384tR6GNW-5T2lA4yI6AfL-EZpDQlJrx3slBaJqu73uIQAHnrVWRm1Cc7wdOvQQSyMgH3VQy5pTgjAzHSxaunw1M6I/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-15+at+8.07.19+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjC0FdYKOgDSiQaQGFg1moAVIyIEncyh9yuCN-UXeusVK_7TDnWX384tR6GNW-5T2lA4yI6AfL-EZpDQlJrx3slBaJqu73uIQAHnrVWRm1Cc7wdOvQQSyMgH3VQy5pTgjAzHSxaunw1M6I/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-15+at+8.07.19+PM.png" height="151" width="200" /></a></span></div>
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">In the ring, a tag team match has already started between Furnas & LaFon and the aforementioned wrestling plumber, TL Hopper. Hopper’s partner is the masked, “Dr. X,” who is actually Tom Prichard, who was left partnerless after “brother” Skip was released from the company. Furnas & LaFon use their technical skills to dissect the jobber tag team, but Hopper does manage to get in a <b>Very Clever Maneuver</b> by picking up LaFon like a spinebuster and depositing him face first on the mat. Lawler defends the plumber, then says that his motto is, “Look out for number one, but don’t step in number two,” which astute readers might recognize from Rodney Dangerfield’s “Back to School.” Furnas gets the hot tag and steamrolls both opponents, hitting a powerslam that Hopper kicks out of. LaFon tags back in and finishes off Hopper with a <b>Maneuver</b> (#2 - cobra clutch suplex). Oh, Philip! </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">It’s now time for the finals of the Karate Fighters tournament, which actually is live, being held in the ring. Marc Mero arrives with Sable, so Lawler brings out Hunter Hearst Helmsley to even the odds. I don’t see how Mero could possibly interfere in this battle of plastic toys. But enough about Sable’s chest. But first, another George and Adam video airs. Back in the ring, Sable vows to “make a pauper” out of the King. Actually, she says that Tiger Ninja is going to make a pauper out of the King. At least she’s doing a good job putting over the power of the toy. Sable scores the victory, despite Jerry’s efforts to “Cyberfist” her. Vince says that the King has been “publicly humiliated” by losing at a game that is basically just down to luck. King demands a rematch, drawing Marc Mero into an argument. Hunter and Jerry double-team Marc Mero until Goldust rushes down to make the save, tripping Sable in the process. Goldust chases Helmsley, who last night made a pass at Marlena, into the audience. Jerry Lawler yells at Goldust, “What’s the big idea, freak!?” He doesn’t understand why Goldust is upset about HHH making a pass at Marlena, since Goldy is, you know…. “What?” asks Goldust. “Queer,” says Lawler after much hesitation. “No,” says the Bizarre One, who then punches Lawler to the mat. Marlena comes out to pose with Goldust who, now outed as heterosexual, can officially become a babyface. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The WWF Carolers, led by Freddie Blassie, sing a tune about Sycho Sid set to the tune of “O Christmas Tree.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Billy Gunn and Bart Gunn each enter separately, with the same theme song playing twice, to face each other in their blow-off match. A woman Vince claims is Bart’s wife is seen in the audience, while Billy’s wife and children are elsewhere in the crowd. I wonder what they think about this feud, which was sparked in part by Billy Gunn’s affair with Sunny. A “We Want Sunny” chant breaks out as Bart drops Billy across the ropes for a stun gun. Billy acts like he’s been hit by an actual stun gun. Billy’s “wife,” who stayed out of the picture while her husband carried out an affair on national television, rushes to the ring to Billy’s aid while yelling at Bart. The match stops much like the Shawn Michaels-Owen Hart match last year that also featured a worked-shoot injury angle. The fans are a little less sympathetic this time around, with one audience member yelling, “Where’s the Undertaker?” Raw goes off the air on a note of uncertainty, with the question on everybody’s mind being, “Does anybody really care what happens to Billy Gunn?”</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Maneuvers</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">9 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-49085889527676947442014-12-09T20:07:00.003-05:002014-12-09T20:07:45.586-05:00Raw #188 - December 9th, 1996<table border="0"><tbody>
<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Warning: the following blog post contains action of a graphic nature. Reader discretion is advised. But not really. Tonight’s bloodless, taped episode of Raw opens with an unnecessary warning in hopes of luring fans away from Nitro on TNT. Sid, whom Vince touts as leading the WWF into a new era and who JR agrees will be a major force in the WWF for a long time (rather than leaving before next summer’s end) faces fellow champion Hunter Hearst Helmsley, whom he beats up in the aisle.</span></td><td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">“I thought the <i>no-holds</i> match was going to be later,” says Lawler in a Freudian slip referring to the Mankind-Undertaker match coming up later tonight. As Sid dominates Hunter, Vince notes that Shawn Michaels has not only earned a title shot at Royal Rumble (“earned” by losing the title last month), but he will also be on commentary during the Bret-Sid title match next Sunday. Considering that Shawn has also stated that he wants to face Sid at the Rumble, ya think Shawn might get involved? Sid hits his powerbomb, a <b>Devastating Maneuver</b>, but Helmsley crawls out of the ring before he can be pinned. Helmsley loses by countout, as the WWF was still shy about letting their title-holders get pinned on television. After this throwaway match, Vince hypes up tonight’s main event by showing clips from the Undertaker-Mankind boiler room brawl, claiming that we have never seen the two men “go at it no holds barred.” This comment comes as Undertaker tips Mankind off a ladder into a pile of aluminum pipes. Also not included under the banner of “no holds barred” is the Buried Alive match.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Goldust faces Bart Gunn, who on Superstars yesterday morning (taped the night after this match) nearly beat Hunter Hearst Helmsley for the Intercontinental title, thwarted only by his brother Billy Gunn’s blatant interference. The announcers have already forgotten that Billy said they weren’t actually real brothers on Livewire. Goldust gets the upper hand at the outset by throwing gold dust into the cowboy’s face. With Bart on the arena floor, Marlena blows smoke into his face. Goldy suplexes Bart back into the ring, but Gunn soon scores a near-fall with a roll-up. Ross says that Goldust may be a little “freakish”, but he’s a great athlete, to which Jerry replies that it’s the pot calling the kettle black. “What do you mean by that?” asks JR. “What do you mean ‘pot’?” asks McMahon. Goldust goes back on the offense as Billy Gunn speaks from backstage. Jim Ross thinks Billy is still trying to impress Sunny, “that little Jezebel,” to which Vince replies, “Let’s be nice.” </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bart Gunn finally gets in some more offense with a cross-body block, then a bulldog, each time for a two-count. Bart attempts a <b>High-Risk Maneuver</b> (#2 - flying body press) off the top rope, but Goldust dodges. The Bizarre One chop-blocks the back of Bart’s knee and pins him. Billy Gunn then comes to the ring and grabs the mic to berate his brother but gets punched by Bart, causing him to retreat. Before the handicap match between Jesse Jammes and the team of Brashaw and Zeb, Zebekiah takes the opportunity to disparage Double J’s service in Desert Storm, bragging that he served in Vietnam for eleven months, twenty-seven days and has had head colds that lasted longer than the Persian Gulf War. Bradshaw says that Double J will scream like a cow that’s hand a branding iron stuck to “its booty.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">At last, it’s time for the finals of the Karate Fighters tournament… or is it? No, tonight’s segment is a recap of the entire tournament dubbed, “The Road to Karate Fighter Monday.” Maybe King and Sable’s toy battle will take place live next week so that Eric Bischoff can’t leak the results ahead of time on Nitro. </span></td> <td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaqlZh6K0t4UaygcpryIrUTbrl3eAeF9oroPRfuuoLakc5GlIClyivGs0b7Wohi8t20YdBG7HUIRR9wi5Z7tfVM7dohGxoY0wYR3P04_A7aLvSmOz9_Rldt-pBiEMtmi6HjvmCFoPxPNk/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-09+at+2.57.41+PM.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaqlZh6K0t4UaygcpryIrUTbrl3eAeF9oroPRfuuoLakc5GlIClyivGs0b7Wohi8t20YdBG7HUIRR9wi5Z7tfVM7dohGxoY0wYR3P04_A7aLvSmOz9_Rldt-pBiEMtmi6HjvmCFoPxPNk/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-09+at+2.57.41+PM.png" height="148" width="200" /></a></td> </tr>
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Jesse Jammes is dead-set on getting revenge on Bradshaw and Zeb, but not enough to forgo singing a country-pop tune on the way to the ring. “I can’t wait to be alone with — you and Zebekiah!” Yes, he actually says this, rushing into the ring to take the Texans by surprise. Do you think Jesse has really been singing about Bradshaw all along? Jammes takes down Justin with a <b>Nice Maneuver</b> (#3 - Japanese arm drag, but the numbers game catches up with him, as the heels soon dominate the match. Jerry Lawler can’t understand what everybody sees in Double J, since he too is a singer-songwriter, as well. King doesn’t bring up “Wrestling with Girls,” though. Bradshaw scores a two-count with what Vince calls a “pinning combination” consisting of leaning on his opponent’s chest and hooking his leg. Double J fends off a superplex attempt to hit a <b>High-Risk Maneuver </b>(#4), a “clothesline” off the top rope that barely connects. Bradshaw slaps a full nelson on Double J, but the country singer escapes to allow Zebekiah to accidentally strike his protege with the branding iron. Double J picks up the win. After the match, Bradshaw punches Zebekiah with “a hard right hand.” “Why would he do that?” asks Vince, stunned. “What kind of a human being is Justin Hawk Bradshaw?” Seventeen years later, The Big Show will punch out Zebekiah for fun, and he’ll be the good guy. Also, Bradshaw will admonish Big Show on commentary for doing so. As for Bradshaw in 1996, fans aren’t sure how to react, but judging by Vince’s commentary, they’re supposed to be booing. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A promo video for the Bret-Sid match claims that Hart has won “seven world titles,” apparently counting the tag team and Intercontinental titles as “world titles.” Hart, who is wearing a snappy denim jacket with his face on it, enters the ring for an interview with Jim Ross, who takes us back to two weeks ago when Austin and Owen Hart tried to “Pillmanize” Bret’s ankle. Well, that term caught on quickly. He also narrates in post-production over top of clips of the incident with Sid on the UK tour, which has not happened yet. Cut back to footage from the arena, where Bret Hart starts talking about Sid without mentioning the fact that he chokeslammed him (because, again, that hasn’t happened yet). He vows that Sid will get “excellently executed” at In Your House. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mankind, who enters the ring to take on The Undertaker in a no-holds-barred match, is seen in the desert of the United Arab Emirates rubbing sand over himself and crying that he wants to go home. Speaking of strange segments, we then go to another clip of superfans George and Adam, who roam the locker rooms at the Alamo Dome and do their best Tony Atlas impression by marveling over a boot. Speaking of sexual abnormalities, JR remarks that Mankind “would rather fight a man than make love to a woman.” Undertaker arrives in a leather robe that has replaced his Batman cape from last week. Undertaker leads off the match with a flying clothesline, followed up with a <b>Patented Undertaker Maneuver </b>(#5) known to modern fans as “Old School.” Taker chokeslams Mankind, then sets up for a Tombstone before being interrupted by The Executioner.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mankind is in control when Raw returns, but Taker soon makes a comeback with a “hard right hand,” then stomping on Mankind’s claw and smashing it with the steps. Mankind comes back with a chop block, which was enough to put Bart Gunn away earlier tonight. The announcers explain, very poorly, the rules to the “Armageddon Rules” match this Sunday between Undertaker and Executioner. Fans chant that Mankind is hardcore after he whips Taker into the steps. Undertaker, says McMahon, has withstood a lot of punishment, marking the first time Vnce has acknowledged “withstanding” rather than “notwithstanding.” Mankind runs off the apron and crashes down on Taker with an elbow drop. Undertaker responds by bodyslamming Mankind onto the Spanish announce table. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br /></td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Todd Pettengill announces the upcoming WWF dates, revealing that for the first time this year, two live Raws in a row will take place within three weeks. Back in the arena, Mankind leaps off the top rope for a <b>High-Risk Maneuver </b>(#6) but is caught by the throat by The Undertaker. Mankind counters with a drop toe hold. Jerry notes that this is the first hold we have seen in this match, to which Vince paradoxically replies, “What do you expect? It’s no-holds-barred.” Mankind grabs a chair but gets it punched back into his face by Mankind. Taker tries the tombstone, but Mankind counters with a mandible claw. Taker, who is apparently too dazed to realize he could just bite down on Mankind’s fingers, appears helpless, but with the help of the creatures of the night, he regains consciousness and breaks the hold. Taker hits the tombstone for the victory. The Executioner then rushes into the ring and jams the Asiatic spike into Undertaker’s throat as Raw signs off.</span></td> </tr>
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</span> <br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally:</span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">6 Maneuvers</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">6 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">6 Individuals</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Notwithstandings</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Unbelievables</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-71933481867579142872014-12-02T17:00:00.000-05:002014-12-02T17:00:07.222-05:00Raw #187 - December 2nd, 1996<table border="0"><tbody>
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</td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Raw opens with no intro for the second week in a row, perhaps in an effort to keep viewers from flipping to Nitro during the theme music. But who needs the Raw theme when Flash Funk’s funky entrance music, funky back-up dancers, and funky Vince McMahon are here to provide us with infinitely more entertainment? “Come on King, shake that thang!” urges Vince. “Come on king, shake the booty!” McMahon is in such a groove that he won’t even let Jerry Lawler’s insults faze him, remarking that were he to knock his toupee off, it indeed “would be funky.”</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Goon jumps Flash Funk before the bell but incurs no time in the penalty box for roughing. Funk responds with a <b>Maneuver</b> (#1 - twisting sunset flip) out of the corner for a two-count. A very tan Shawn Michaels appears on the split-screen to deliver what we are told is an apology “of sorts” that will come in a few moments. Flash Funk hits a moonsault off the top rope to the floor before the break, knocking The Goon in the head with his knee. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Back on the air, Jerry Lawler suspects that Shawn Michaels’s apology is for his haircut before laughing about Tiny Tim dying at age 64. Flash Funk interrupts the levity with an enziguiri to The Goon’s head, a <b>Maneuver</b> (#2) followed up by a moonsault that The Goon avoids. Flash soon recovers to deliver a moonsault leg drop, a <b>Maneuver</b> (#3) that Vince immediately tells the audience to “forget about,” so what was I talking about? Tiny Tim? Flash Funk scores a pinfall after hitting a move I suddenly don’t remember. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Fake Diesel is set to wrestle tonight, which means JR is at the announce table again to disparage Vince’s commentary performance. JR has already heard “four ‘What-a-Maneuvers’ and two ‘I-know-that’s-rights’” tonight. Don’t exaggerate Jim; it’s only been two “What-a-Maneuvers” and one “Look-at-that-Maneuver.” Fake Diesel and Fake Razor are the next tag team champions, according to Ross, but they need leadership. A vignette airs of two superfans who have shown up seven weeks early for the Royal Rumble.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">A tribute to Tiny Tim airs, showing clips of Tim’s Raw appearance on King’s Court where Jerry smashed his ukulele, an act Lawler brags about contributing to the musician’s ultimate demise. Diesel is “taking it to” Phineas in singles action, and Jim Ross thinks he and Razor will beat Owen and Davey Boy for the tag team titles at the upcoming In Your House. Phineas whips Diesel into the turnbuckle chest-first, dislodging the “King Cam” mounted in the corner for low-quality close-up shots of the action. Meanwhile, Razor Ramon comes to ringside for “a bird’s eye view” of the match, suggesting that Vince doesn’t know what a bird’s eye view is. Or maybe he’s talking about the view of a flightless bird like a kiwi. Whatever the case, Phineas releases Diesel from an impending Slop Drop to take a shot at the Bad Guy, prompting JR to call the hog farmer an “idiot” and a “buffoon.” Diesel takes advantage by jackknifing PIG, struggling to hoist up Phineas as if he were Paul Wight or someone before dropping him like a sack of potatoes and/or bricks. Diesel picks up the win.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Shawn Michaels comes on the air for “not being defensive enough” in his interview. He also apologizes for being so emotional last week, which at first seems like sarcasm, but in fact the promo he cuts is pure “New Shawn Michaels,” meaning smiley and kid-friendly. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Real Double J enters the ring singing his own theme song, “With My Baby Tonight.” His name is spelled “Jesse Jammes.” Yes, that’s “Jammes,” as in “J-A-Double M-E S. His opponent is Justin Hawk Bradshaw, whose planned push was recently scrapped when he was accidentally eliminated in the Survivor Series Free-For-All. Bradshaw executes a La Magistral cradle, a <b>Maneuver</b> (#4) that is a “beautiful pinning combination.” Vince announces that next week, it will be “No Holds Barred.” No, not the 1989 Hulk Hogan vehicle, but the fifth televised match between Undertaker and Mankind. Vince makes out like this match will top the violence of their October match that could only be won by murdering the other man. “Jammes” hits a <b>Nice Maneuver</b> (#5 - belly-to-back suplex), followed by another <b>Nice Maneuver</b> (#6 - back body drop) to counter a piledriver or powerbomb attempt. Double J gets his foot pulled by Zebekiah, a distraction that allows Bradshaw to hit a clothesline for the victory, which Vince calls, “an upset.” He and Zeb then “brand” Double J’s arm. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">In Karate Fighters news, the scheduled Sid vs. Mr. Perfect semifinal match has been scrapped (since you can’t very well have the world champion play with a children’s toy with a man who has been AWOL for the past month). Replacing the Master and Ruler of the World from West Memphis will be the King of Memphis, Tennessee. Replacing Mr. Perfect will be Todd Pettengill. Wow, can you imagine how much worse Survivor Series 1993 would have been if Perfect’s substitute were the Toddster instead of the Macho Man? In keeping with the level of maturity shown in the “Billionaire Ted” skits from earlier in the year, the sound of a baby crying plays while Mr. Perfect’s cowardly disappearance is mentioned. Jerry Lawler beats Pettengill to advance to the finals against Sable.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Some much-hyped footage from the recent UK tour airs, but not before we see a replay of last week’s events, where Stone Cold tried to, in Lawler’s words, “Pillmanize” Bret Hart, only to be thwarted by Bulldog once and then a second time when he attempted the <b>Same Maneuver</b> (#7) again. This past Wednesday, Austin hit Sid with the title belt during their match, which the referee didn’t see, but Bulldog then interfered, drawing a DQ against Sid. Hitman rescued Bulldog from a Sid powerbomb but was then chokeslammed “down to the canvas.” Backstage in London, Owen tries to calm down Bulldog, re-focusing his attention away from Stone Cold and toward Razor and Diesel, whom the tag champions will face in their third heels-versus-heels match in four pay-per-views. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Marc Mero, the classy Sable, and Jake Roberts arrive to take on the degenerate team of Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Billy Gunn, both of whom have not only DX in their future, but also long careers retaining their gimmicky names well past their original gimmicks’ life cycles. Before the match, the Slam of the Week features Al “Leif Cassidy” Snow beat up on the future Scotty 2 Hotty on Superstars. Jerry Lawler recounts some of the shocking revelations made by Billy Gunn on Livewire this Saturday, such as the fact that he and Bart Gunn aren’t even really brothers. This raises more questions than answers, as what are the odds that two guys who happened to be named “Gunn” would end up tagging together? Lawler jokes that it won’t be a Merry Christmas at the Gunn household, apparently forgetting that Billy just said he’s not related to Bart. On the McMahon end of things, Vince calls Hunter Hearst Helmsley, “Mr. Pompisity,” which my spell-check has rightly underlined, before taking a look at “beautiful, gorgeous, lovely Sable.” AS Jake Roberts handles Billy in the early going, Jesse “Jammes” gets on the split-screen, taking attention away from the match involving his future tag team partner and his future stablemate. He challenges both Bradshaw and Uncle Zeb to a handicap match “next week,” meaning during the next hour of this four-show taping, so we’ll have to see whether the ink from Bradshaw’s “branding iron” is still visible on his left arm. The face team continues to overwhelm the heel team and underwhelm the fans in attendance. Gunn manages to counter the DDT (that’s “the” DDT by Jake Roberts, rather than “a” DDT by anyone else) with a back body drop, then tags in Helmsley as Jerry Lawler jokes about Jake dying just like Tiny Tim. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After commercial, Jake surprises Billy Gunn with the DDT, then crawls to Marc Mero for the hot tag. Helmsley also tags in and gets pummeled by the Wildman. An attempted double-team by the heels backfires, and Gunn is then knocked down off the ring apron, leading to an argument and Gunn’s angry departure from the match. Wildman hits the Samoan Drop on his rival and In Your House opponent before finishing off Hunter with the Wild Thing. Post-match, Jake tosses the snake on Hunter, who bails out of the ring.</span></td> </tr>
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<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally: </span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">7 Maneuvers (Year total: 188)</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Mee-lays</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">5 Unbelievables</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">4 Notwithstandings</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3 Unquestionablies</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3 Individuals</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">3 Oh My Goodnesses</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3182996419901924691.post-26734724263153872102014-11-25T17:00:00.000-05:002014-11-25T17:00:07.677-05:00Raw #186 - November 25th, 1996<table border="0"><tbody>
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</td><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Bret Hart wrestles on Raw for the first time in months to face Owen Hart, who is accompanied by the man he will beat out for the Best Bow Tie Slammy, Clarence Mason. Owen still has the “King of Harts” playing card lighting during his entrance. Those transparencies they put over the lights can’t come cheat, so you’re darn right they’re gonna get their money’s worth. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Owen and Bret chain-wrestle, with Owen taking down the Hitman with a <b>Nice Maneuver </b>(drop toe-hold), but Bret rolls through and slaps a hammerlock on. A brief slapping match erupts before the brothers return to exchanging holds. British Bulldog is seen watching the match backstage as JR explains Bret’s busy schedule over the next week, including appearances in the UK and the United Arab Emirates. Owen works over Bret’s “back-area,” even applying The Sultan’s patented Camel Clutch. Owen hits a <b>Beautiful Maneuver</b> (#2 - belly to back suplex) that he parlays into a “pinning combination” that consists of Owen leaning across Bret’s chest. Maybe it’s a little simplistic to merit the term, “combination.”</span></td> <td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZhbM6OLdF7ij9wwq8Ngql3cpbnY-gys5F9vOk5dcI2ogoQhxpTt0pbzGRebGCbAdnQjfqqyNdUfo0lFCcxe6zNfRiYu9UECMeDOol5kmu_pQITNDkDMX2zKiDyzGq-kbGK6vqTKnUjLU/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-05+at+6.29.36+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZhbM6OLdF7ij9wwq8Ngql3cpbnY-gys5F9vOk5dcI2ogoQhxpTt0pbzGRebGCbAdnQjfqqyNdUfo0lFCcxe6zNfRiYu9UECMeDOol5kmu_pQITNDkDMX2zKiDyzGq-kbGK6vqTKnUjLU/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-05+at+6.29.36+PM.png" height="148" width="200" /></a><br />
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">After the break, Bret is in control as the announcers remark about Sid’s popularity. Vince says that “many individuals” feel it’s the dawning of a new era. As JR complains about the other announcers’ lack of attention to the match, Bret starts on the Five Moves of Doom, hitting Owen with a Russian leg sweep, a backbreaker, an elbow smash, and a headbutt to the abdomen after teasing the Sharpshooter. You may have noticed that that is only four moves; in the nearly three years of Raws I’ve watched, I have still yet to see a complete “Five Moves of Doom” out of Bret. Owen rolls up Bret but gets kicked out of the ring, then attempts a sunset flip that Bret rolls through for the Sharpshooter. Immediately after applying the hold, Steve Austin enters and hits Bret with a chair drawing a disqualification. Stone Cold stomps Hart, then uses the chair to attempt to Pillmanize the Hitman. Bulldog strolls down to the ring and removes the chair, twice, as he argues with Owen. Stone Cold whacks Bulldog in the back, which Vince finds, and I quote, unbelievable, not to mention, and I quote, unbelievable. Yeah, he said it twice. Owen gives Steve a harsh talking-to, and Austin walks off. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Todd Pettengill announces dates for the WWF’s Heartbreak Express Tour, which was perhaps named before they realized Michaels would be dropping the title amidst a fan backlash against the Sexy Boy. Live events include a date at the Catholic Youth Center in Scranton, PA, which sounds like the kind of two-bit show Michael Scott would put together. The tour ends in Syracuse, where hopefully those nine thugs will not be in attendance. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">The Executioner comes to the ring for a match with Bowlegs, Oklahoma’s Freddie Joe Floyd, whom Paul Bearer threatens may be “no legs” after this match. The Executioner faces The Undertaker in one of Taker’s patented cryptic stipulation matches (such as the Rest in Peace match and the Final Curtain match), this time an Armageddon Rules match. Executioner works Floyd over with clotheslines in the corner, finishing him off with an “Asian spike,” an <b>Unusual Maneuver</b> (#3) that sees Terry Gordy jam his thumb into his opponent’s neck. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">We join Shawn Michaels and José Lothario “LIVE” from his home, which implies (correctly) that the rest of the show is not live. Supersock has a portrait of himself hanging in his living room. That is, the portrait is hanging, not the image of Lothario in the portrait. Shawn admits that he lost his edge over the past eight months, a line that was misremembered for years by 1wrestling.com, which used to insist that Shawn’s original “lost my smile” speech took place here and not in the ring a few months later. Shawn expresses his anger at Sid for assaulting his mentor, his voice raising to a comedic pitch like Jerry Seinfeld when he tries to sound angry. He vows to be more like the “old Shawn Michaels,” taking a lot more risks and being a lot more flamboyant, marking the only time in recorded history that someone has threatened to be “more flamboyant” in an attempt to inspire fear. Rocky Maivia is seen in his Saba Simba starter gear on the split screen as Shawn ends his rant.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Sunny strolls to the ring for commentary as Vince says that the hot young superstar is “warming up and ready for action” (referring to Maivia). Vince stands up and dances with Sunny before Lawler reprimands him and tells him to watch his hands. Vince raises both his hands up like he’s been caught in the act (by a cop, that is) and takes us to another Karate Fighters segment. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">At long last, Sable and Sunny go head to head… at Karate Fighters. Jerry Lawler looks a little too excited for this match, considering that he has spent the last eight months talking about how ugly Sable is. Sunny wins the bout, but the decision is reversed when the referee discovers she has used chewing gum to secure Cyberfist’s foot to the pedestal. Sable wins and advances to the finals. Rather than starting a catfight with the referee, Sunny punches the referee. Jerry and todd make gum jokes about the loss being “hard to swallow.” Who would have thought that a segment featuring Sunny, Sable, and the terms, “swallow” and “cyberfist” would be so lame?</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Back in the ring, Salvatore Sincere is cutting a very insincere promo about loving everybody. Sunny, however, loves Rocky Maivia. Could she be eyeing the third-generation star as her next client? No, because that would involve putting Sunny into a meaningful TV role, which the WWF has inexplicably decided against in the past few months. Lou Albano and Don Muraco deliver pre-recorded endorsements of Maivia, which Jerry finds less-than-genuine. There’s nothing less-than-genuine about Sunny, though (except her breasts), as the guest commentator does her best “Sexy Vince McMahon” impression (a great Halloween idea, by the way) by lustily calling Rocky “one young, impressive individual.” Rocky tumbles through the ropes, then gets kicked with a baseball slide into the “retaining barriuh,” as Vince calls it. On his way back into the ring, Maivia grabs the top rope and slingshots Sincere, pulling him out of the ring the hard way for Rocky’s first-ever <b>Maneuver </b>(#4). Lawler calls him a “pineapple-head,” harking back to Doink the evil clown’s feud with Crush. Lawler gets jealous over Sunny’s continuing innuendo about The Rock, saying that “Sable is starting to look a little better,” as is the soon-to-be-divorced Pamela Anderson, as King mentions in his obligatory topical reference of the evening. Rocky sidesteps Salvatore as he charges at him in the corner, sending the Sicilian crashing into the ring post for a <b>Devastating Maneuver</b> (#5). Rocky, who Sunny says is the kind of person to build an entire organization around, signals for his finisher, the shoulder-breaker, by stomping his feet, squatting, and extending his right arm. How does that not catch on, but the People’s Eyebrow does? Rocky picks up the victory, and Sunny is reluctant to take off her headset and leave ringside. Meanwhile, a fan has created an Austin 3:16 parody sign reading, “John 3:16.” John must be a friend of his or something. </span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Marc Mero and Sable arrive, prompting Vince to wonder, “Are we gonna see the Wild Thing right here tonight? I bet we do!” By that, he means Mero’s shooting star press finisher. Before Mero can take on Billy Gunn, Dok Hendrix tries to sell us on the Superstar Line’s Option 6, where we can find out where Mr. Perfect is. If you guessed, “on a plane to Atlanta,” you’re probably closer to the truth than whatever JR says, though Hennig won’t show up in WCW until the summer. </span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</td> <td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Dok is back at it after the commercial break, filling us in on the backstage shenanigans that supposedly happened between Owen and Davey Boy. Imagine the time Raw could save nowadays if they just had Michael Hayes recap backstage segments while standing in front of the Raw logo rather than actually filming them. Hunter Hearst Helmsley is at the announcers’ table, nearly coming to blows with Mero, who faces HHH’s future DX buddy Billy Gunn. Mero hits a <b>Maneuver</b> (#6 - Merosault) that Vince tells us to look at. Hunter is speaking with something resembling his normal voice, but still slightly affecting a Connecticut blue blood accent. Vince accuses Hunter of using everybody in his life to advance his career, whether it be his former valet, Sable, his former cohort Mr. Perfect, or his future wife Stephanie McMahon (I’m embellishing slightly). Hunter says that using people is what we’re on this Earth to do. Billy Gunn attempts a series of pins that Mero kicks out of easily, then hits the Wildman with a Triple-H-style knee drop that actually connects. Billy then lands another <b>Maneuver</b> (#7 - neckbreaker) that Vince tells us to look at. The future Mr. Ass then taunts Sable with a Batusi before climbing the ropes for a <b>High-Risk Maneuver</b> (#8) that Mero counters by running the ropes and crotching the cowboy.</span></td> </tr>
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<tr><td><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Mero hits a top-rope huracanrana on Billy Gunn for a two-count before Hunter steps away from the announce table to harass Sable. Mero hits one last Maneuver (#9 - Samoan drop) that Vince yet again tells us to look at. Mero steps out of the ring to confront Hunter, slugging the blue blood outside of the ring before being blindsided by Gunn. As the future degenerates double-team Mero, the referee calls for the bell and Jake Roberts thinks this is some of his business, so he rushes to ringside to even the sides. Reportedly, this match and its finish had to be taped twice, so it’s a good thing the WWF still tapes four weeks’ worth of TV in one night rather than running live every night.</span></td> <td><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlh8CS9nckpPHmRNSrgCZejf8HGE25GG7pSq0t93a1mwCIIVH-mAAI9NHchpOnQ4x5B-DkNM7IZzJTTEGQP3w8Cq5FaDmgcJRRlwwi3CYK_VcYYNSAKdnD7Y4-vyNmVZwwnceTfJsLt48/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-07+at+7.12.58+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlh8CS9nckpPHmRNSrgCZejf8HGE25GG7pSq0t93a1mwCIIVH-mAAI9NHchpOnQ4x5B-DkNM7IZzJTTEGQP3w8Cq5FaDmgcJRRlwwi3CYK_VcYYNSAKdnD7Y4-vyNmVZwwnceTfJsLt48/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-07+at+7.12.58+PM.png" height="147" width="200" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeYzIAkFYYeGMtJYfOs_mWFSxhMuT_1SwocIWCrUbP5lUmrvFIi2M8Ye9dIQL6E8CR5Vgu2ELfGCv1cJMcWXdBH9SYgT87oq4fePIxKZH0jbHaJX0CZx7hpF4m9Jg382KUyTKGp4JE4Qc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-07+at+7.13.47+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeYzIAkFYYeGMtJYfOs_mWFSxhMuT_1SwocIWCrUbP5lUmrvFIi2M8Ye9dIQL6E8CR5Vgu2ELfGCv1cJMcWXdBH9SYgT87oq4fePIxKZH0jbHaJX0CZx7hpF4m9Jg382KUyTKGp4JE4Qc/s1600/Screen+Shot+2014-11-07+at+7.13.47+PM.png" height="145" width="200" /></a></div>
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</span> <br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Final tally: </span></h2>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">9 Maneuvers (Year total: 181)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Unbelievables</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">2 Individuals</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">6 Oh My Goodnesses</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">1 Notwithstanding</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br />
</span></div>
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