Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Raw #105 - April 3rd, 1995

It's time for the fallout from the greatest Wrestlemania ever to be held in a shopping mall, Wrestlemania XI! First, we get a recap of the event through video stills, Vince McMahon's narration, and the cheesy Wrestlemania theme that Linda McMahon would later use. It's a homecoming of sorts for Raw, as tonight's episode emanates from the Mid-Hudson Civic Center in Poughkeepsie, New York, the home of Raw after it left the Manhattan Center.


Jim Cornette is pleased with himself, as last night he found himself manager of the tag team champions for the first time in his WWF career. That makes up for the Heavenly Bodies not wrestling another match in the Federation. Bob Holly is the first man out of the entrance way tonight, and he is followed out by the 123 Kid. Hakushi comes to the ring with Shinja to take on his future Underdogs Survivor Series teammate. Vince recalls the Devastating Maneuver applied by Hakushi on Bret Hart after the Hitman was given an award by the Japanese media on Superstars. Still no word yet on why Lawler kept calling him a racist.
The action gets off to a fast-paced start as Holly takes down the Modern-Day Kamikaze with a Nice Maneuver (#2 - standing shoulder block). The new tag team champions, Owen Hart and Yokozuna, arrive at ringside before Raw goes to break.

Hakushi is in control as Raw returns from break, with the White Angel keeping a slow pace. While Hakushi holds Holly in a top wristlock, Owen tries to jump The Kid, only to catch a spin kick. Yokozuna then kicks The Kid to the ground. Holly hits a flying clothesline off the top rope, but is unable to capitalize. Both men get to their feet at the same time, and Sparky takes control with punches and clotheslines until Yokozuna trips the race car driver as he runs the ropes. Hakushi takes advantage with a running senton splash to get the pin.
Jim Ross gives a Wrestlemania report in place of the Toddster, summarizing the main event (yes, main event) of LT vs. Bam Bam Bigelow. We also get a run-down of the astoundingly terrible Bret Hart vs. Bob Backlund "I Quit" match, which featured surprise guest referee Roddy Piper, who helped ruin the match by yelling, "Whaddaya say?" into the mic every ten seconds. Jim Ross explains that Roddy Piper "says he heard Bob Backlund say 'I Quit'" (which he didn't). Speaking of surprise guest referees, the forgettable American League Umpire Larry Young refereed the forgettable Undertaker-Bundy match. Ross speculates that The Undertaker will face Kama in the future over the stolen urn (anything to keep Taker out of title contention).


Vince McMahon invites Diesel to the ring for an interview. Diesel addresses Shawn Michaels's request for a rematch, admitting in so many words that he might have lost if it hadn't been for Sid. If Sid hadn't drawn the referee out of the ring, Earl Hebner wouldn't have twisted his ankle (which, despite the dozens of cameras crowding ringside, nobody caught on film, "things might have been a little different." In other words, he would have lost. The champion agrees that Shawn deserves a rematch (which will never end up happening). In the audience, a fan holds up a sign implying that Kevin Nash has "dangerous curves." Diesel tells Shawn that Sycho Sid is not HBK's friend, and that he's only after one thing. Sex? No, himself. The champion tells the Boy Toy not to bring his bodyguard to the rematch.
Up next is a battle of the embarrassing tag teams, as Well Dunn (two grown men in bowties, spandex, and thongs) take on The Allied Powers (two grown men with flags on their crotches). Vince compares Lex and Davey Boy to FDR and Winston Churchill, vastly overestimating Luger's ability to perform a figure four leglock. Cornette says that if the Allies in WWII had performed as well as the new tag team, we'd all be speaking German. The Powers get subdued after a fiery start, with Luger taking the leapfrog move invented by the Beverly Brothers and later used by The World's Greatest Tag Team. Bulldog gets the hot (or lukewarm) tag, allowing Bulldog to clean house and tag right back out. The Powers finish off Dunn with a Hart Attack (with Luger's forearm replacing Bret Hart's clothesline.





Bull Nakano defends her Women's title for the first time on Raw since winning it last November. Such are the pitfalls of having a women's division with only two competitors. Pre-nosejob Alundra Blayze looks to regain her title. Nakano, who has the generic Oriental music used for such luminaries as The Orient Express. Bull strikes Alundra before the bell as Cornette announces a six-man tag match between Owen, Yokozuna, & Hakushi and Bret, 123 Kid, and Bob Holly. Nakano works over the challenger until Blayze fights back with facebusters and flying dropkicks. Bull turns things around with a sit-down splash, but gets only a two before applying the Queen Angelito Stretch. What a Submission Maneuver! (#3) She follows this up with a piledriver for another two-count, then goes to the top rope, only to be dropkicked to the outside by an Alundra Blayze Maneuver (#4). Alundra follows this up with a leap from the top rope for some Beautiful Maneuvering (#5). A huracanrana attempt by Blayze back in the ring gets reversed into a powerbomb, allowing Nakano to hit a leg drop off the top rope. Somehow, Blayze kicks out, then reverses a German suplex attempt into a victory roll for a two-count. Vince shows us a replay of Blayze's top-rope Maneuvering (#6). Blayze hits a series of bridging German suplexes for two-counts before attempting a High-Risk Maneuver (#7) only to be kicked off the top rope to the outside). Nakano attempts a topé through the ropes, but Alundra moves and hits her with another German suplex on the outside before getting whipped into the steps. Back in the ring, Nakano misses a moonsault, then gets caught with a German suplex for a three-count. Blayze regains the Women's title before being assaulted by an unidentified woman in KISS face paint previously known as Monster Ripper. She kayfabe breaks Blayze's nose (and her breasts, I suppose), allowing Alundra a leave of absence to get a nose- and boob-job (presumably, in separate procedures). Rumor has it that Bull was supposed to retain the title here and feud with Monster Ripper throughout the summer, but drugs in Nakano's locker put the kibosh on her WWF career and ultimately the women's division.
The newly-turned heels Men on a Mission step into the ring, attacking Ben Jordan and Tony Roy before the bell. Too bad they turned heel right as the Gunns dropped the tag team titles to another heel team, effectively taking Mabel and Mo out of contention. Who knows, maybe Mabel could win the King of the Ring or something. Mabel impresses with his terrible sidewalk slam and even worse spinning heel kick. A belly-to-belly on Roy nabs Mabel a pinfall victory for his team.

Vince is back in the ring to interview Shawn Michaels, who arrives with Sycho Sid. HBK admits to, like Big Daddy Cool, having trouble forgetting their friendship last night. Awwww! He accepts Diesel's offer of a rematch (which he never gets during Diesel's remaining seven months as champion). Shawn says he doesn't need a bodyguard and gives him the night off during the rematch. Sid responds by calling HBK a "stupid little puke," getting a huge pop from the crowd. We go to break.
When Raw returns, Sid is in the ring with his boot on a prone Michaels's back after having delivered a series of botched powerbombs to the number-one contender that are not shown on TV. Diesel runs in to drive Sid from the ring as Raw closes.



Final Tally:

7 Maneuvers (Year total: 49)

4 comments:

  1. That's former GWF Light Heavyweight Champion Ben Jordan to you.

    That's better.

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  2. That fan with the Diesel sign just had to show the world his knowledge of obscure Tate Donovan movies.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Enjoying these recaps. Thanks for bringing back some great (and some not so great) memories.

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  4. That Women's Championship match was actually very very good!

    ReplyDelete