Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Raw #106 - April 10th, 1995

After an eventful post-Wrestlemania episode last week, Raw is back to its old tricks, featuring Jerry Lawler and Vince McMahon in front of a green screen. The King takes Jim Cornette's place, as the manager will be in the corner of Owen Hart, Yokozuna, and Hakushi in their match against Bret Hart, Bob Holly, and the 123 Kid. Maybe we'll get some insight from Lawler into how Bret Hart is racist.
Adam Bomb, whom Vince claims is very popular with Special Olympians (no comment), comes to the ring to face Tatanka. Bomb poses in a manner most fabulous as his pyro goes off. Vince claims that The Million Dollar Corporation was embarrassed at Wrestlemania (just because Bam Bam lost to a football player and King Kong Bundy lost to The Undertaker and no Corporation member would win on pay-per-view for the next five months or so). Adam Bomb dominates the early going, driving Tatanka from the ring with a dropkick. Vince takes exception to Tatanka's strategy of repeated overhead chops, which Bomb overcomes with a flying clothesline.

When Raw returns from break, Tatanka is back in control apparently due to interference from Ted DiBiase. Vince speculates that Tatanka learned how to kick Bomb in the gut from LT's All-Pro team. While the Native American locks Bomb in a sleeper, which Vince notes is Tatanka's first wrestling hold of the match, McMahon reminds us that Bob Backlund has a special announcement, as does Ted DiBiase. Bomb whips Tatanka to the ropes but delivers a Little Bit of a Telegraphed Maneuver, ducking his head for a back body drop and taking a boot to the chest. Bomb is undeterred, unleashing a flurry of offense that drives Tatanka to the outside. Bomb follows the Native American out, where they both get counted out.
The Headshrinkers (Fatu and Sione) come to the ring to take on jobber mainstays Tony DeVito and Mike Bell. The 'Shrinkers still have Capt. Lou and Afa as managers, but Afa now wears a robe and a pony tail. Lawler doesn't believe McMahon when he says he's a Duck Man fan; The King thinks that Vince is too behind the times to get with the new generation of ducks. Mike Bell tries a double-noggin-knocker on the Headshrinkers because he has never seen a Samoan wrestle and doesn't know that their heads are impervious to pain. Fatu retaliates with his own double-noggin-knocker to Bell and DeVito. Tony sneaks a Maneuver (#2 - knee) in on Fatu as the Samoan runs the ropes, then gets a right hand for his trouble. Sione knees Bell as he runs the ropes, then tags in, drags Bell to the corner, and allows him to tag in DeVito for more punishment. Fatu tags in an hits a splash on DeVito for the win.

We see a vignette with Jean-Pierre Lafitte that unfortunately has been ruined by WWE dubbing over that terrible stock metal music over top of it so as to render the former Quebecer's words unintelligible. He says he wants to reclaim the treasure that the U.S. stole from his great-grandfather, Jean Lafitte. He will face Duke "The Dumpster" Droese next week in a match that could only take place in 1995's WWF.
We see a replay of last week's Shawn Michaels interview, including unseen footage from the commercial break in which Sid beat up HBK with boots and a botched powerbomb. Sid gets a big pop when he nails Michaels from behind, as well as each time he powerbombs Shawn. Vince does his best to ignore Sid's cheers so as not to create yet another new babyface more popular than the champion.

Kama, the greatest wrestler named for a punctuation mark since Carlos Colon, comes to the ring to face the future Scotty 2 Hotty Scott Taylor. Kama wears a gold chain around his neck, purportedly the former urn of The Undertaker's. I wonder what he did with the ashes, green smoke, and/or flood light contained inside? Lawler notes The Supreme Fighting Machine's many tattoos, most of which are covered with his t-shirt to obscure the fact that he used to be Papa Shango. The future Godfather finishes off Taylor with a Vader Bomb.
We see highlights from last week's Women's Title match, in which Bull Nakano's flying leg drop Maneuver (#3) was not enough to finish Alundra Blayze off. Lawler goes into one of his trademarked pop culture/current events-related tangents, claiming that Blayze wanted to wrestle Geraldo Rivera after the TV host challenged Bryant Gumbel. We then see Rhonda Singh attack Blayze, breaking her nose and forcing her to undergo "reconstructive nose surgery" (AKA a nose job). Though Vince claims that we now know that the woman was not simply a fan, he fails to identify her by name.

The team of Hakushi, Yokozuna, and Owen Hart arrive with their three managers (Shinja, Jim Cornette, and Mr. Fuji). Vince notes that last week's Raw was the highest-rated episode ever. Bret and Yoko start the match off, and Vince notes that Yokozuna looks even larger than when we saw him at Survivor Series last year. That sabbatical was supposed to allow him to lose weight. Holly and Hakushi tag in, allowing Sparky to scoop slam the newcomer multiple times and hit an arm drag right before commercial.
The Kid tags in after the break, and Hakushi takes control as Lawler begs him to tag Yokozuna. Instead, he tags in Owen. The Kid blocks a hiptoss attempt and backflips for a Maneuver (#4) followed by a spin kick. Owen tags in Yokozuna, who envelops the 200-pound Kid with a nerve hold. Yoko tags Hakushi in rather than sitting on The Kid for a pinfall. Hakushi tags in Owen as the fans chant, "We want Bret."

The Kid is still in the ring with Owen when Raw returns, nearly pinning Owen before Yokozuna tags back in to deliver a leg drop. Yoko tags in to Hakushi, who continues toying with The Kid, even executing a Devastating Maneuver (#5 - tilt-a-whirl backbreaker). The Kid finally counters a huracanrana with a sitdown powerbomb and tags in Bret Hart, who faces off with the new legal man Yokozuna. The Hitman takes down Yokozuna with a bulldog from the ropes and scores a near-fall after an elbow smash. Bret pulls Hakushi into the ring, allowing Yokozuna to attack him from behind and tag in Owen, who cuts off his brother's momentum. Bret tags in Bob Holly, then dropkicks Owen, allowing Spark Plugg to get a pinfall with a schoolboy.
A group of pre-teen boys, apparently paid off with free t-shirts, chant for Duckman, which comes up next on USA. Vince and Jerry Lawler plug the Wrestlemania XI encore from the comfort of their green screen announce table. For some reason, Vince shows teh entire introduction of LT's All-Pro team. Next week, Owen Hart and Yokozuna defend their tag team titles against Bob Holly and the 123 Kid.

Final Tally:

5 Maneuvers (Year total: 54)

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