Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Raw #119 - July 10th, 1995

Tonight's Raw opens up with a raucous crowd that, according to Vince McMahon, is "anxiously awaiting the presence of the Caribbean legend, Savio Vega." Either that, or they were told to make a lot of noise right before the cameras started rolling. Tonight, the Allied Powers take on the team of Tatanka and Henry Godwinn, with whom Ted DiBiase has replaced King Kong Bundy.

Out first tonight is Savio Vega! No, wait, it's the Roadie. That crowd must be really pumped about Savio wrestling a jobber to cheer for him when his match isn't for fifteen minutes. Shortly into Roadie's match with Jerry Flynn, a "Roadie" chant breaks out for the King of the Ring semi-finalist. Flynn ties Roadie up with a wristlock, which he parlays into a heel kick for an Offensive Maneuver (#1). Roadie responds with a series of elbow drops. Flynn attempts an enziguiri, but Roadie ducks and slaps on a half crab for the second Maneuver of the match. Jarrett's road agent repeatedly uses the ropes for additional leverage as Lawler tells McMahon that "With My Baby Tonight" is Hugh Grant's new theme song. My six-year-old mind didn't quite get the connection between that song title and Hugh Grant's recent arrest for solicitation of prostitution. In fact, even now, it's not that great of a joke. Vince isn't impressed either. Roadie reverses a leapfrog into a powerbomb for the victory. Vince teases a Roadie face turn by complaining about Double J always stealing the spotlight.
Next, for the sake of filling time, we see old clips of Jeff Jarrett trying to make it big in Nashville and Vegas, followed by a repeat showing of his music video.

Savio Vega makes his long-awaited appearance, facing Mike Khoury. The WWE re-release of this episode edits out Barry Dadinsky's pitch for WWF merchandise. Vince mentions Savio and Razor Ramon's upcoming match at In Your House against Men on a Mission, while Jerry warns that the first few rows may get covered in refried beans when Mabel splashes "Old Burrito Breath" Vega. That's Mexican, Jerry. Savio twists Khoury up for the pinfall.
Vince introduces the man considered to be the next "Word Rustling Federation" champion, Sid. The big man has still yet to win a world title at this point, though he did take a stab at it in WCW. DiBiase calls down his fifteen hand-picked lumberjacks, consisting of pretty much the entire heel locker room. Of course, this is 1995, so that locker room includes luminaries like Mantaur, Rad Radford, Jean-Pierre LaFitte, and the Blu Twins. Sid takes the microphone to remind us all why he has Ted DiBiase speak for him. A close-up of Sid's nose hairs closes out the segment.

Jerry Lawler narrates a video package on Barry Horowitz, who the previous day on the Action Zone picked up his first victory against Bodydonna Skip. We see a replay of the upset victory. After the match, Sunny gets on the microphone and complains about a fast count. Jack Tunney now comes out to the ring and reverses the previous day's decision, guaranteeing that when Horowitz does legitimately win his first match, the fans won't react because they'll be expecting another screwjob. I'm kidding of course, as Jack Tunney would never make such a business-killing move. This next guy, on the other hand...
Hunter Hearst Helmsley saunters to the ring to face Matt Hardy, who Vince suspects could upset the Connecticut Blue Blood tonight. Vince makes the second reference to Hugh Grant of the night, comparing HHH to the Oxford-educated actor. This allows Lawler to make the same lame joke about "With My Baby Tonight," while apologizing to "Miss Divine Brown," the hooker Grant got caught with. Vince plugs the "chat lines" on the Internet, where WWF fans have been discussing the recent King of the Ring event. McMahon also informs the viewers that Jack Tunney retired just six days ago on July 4th. Vince and Jerry continue to banter, discussing Lawler's crown, which King says he was born with, forcing him to be delivered via the Heimlich maneuver. Speaking of maneuvers, Matt Hardy's moonsault Maneuver (#3) misses Helmsley, who "anticipated the Maneuvers [#4] there of Matt Hardy. "Heimlich Maneuver!?" (#5) asks Vince in bewilderment. Helmsley follows up with a pedigree, ramming "the kisser of Matt Hardy into the canvas" for the victory.

The Allied Powers, accompanied to the ring by two little kids, come to the ring to take on Tatanka and Henry Godwinn. The Million Dollar team get the jump on the Powers, with Tatanka DDTing Lex Luger. Remember when a DDT used to end a match instead of beginning it? The crowd chants, "USA" to cheer Lex Luger and the British Bulldog against a Native American and an Arkansas hog farmer. Vince wonders whether Godwinn is already a member of DiBiase's corporation. Maybe we should have a whole summer of Duke  Droese accusing Godwinn of selling out, only for The Dumpster to be the real sell-out.
Luger is still being singled out by Tatanka and Godwinn when Raw returns from break. Vince mentions Bill Clinton's recent speech against violence on television, taking the opportunity to extol the virtues of WWF's sports entertainment, "not... to be confused with the undisciplined genre of professional wrestling in general." Lex finally gets the hot tag to the Bulldog, catching him in the corner with a Maneuver (#6 - running powerslam). Tatanka, however, grabs the ropes before he can be slammed and reverses the move into a pin. Bulldog kicks out and continues his offense until getting tripped by the hog farmer. Tatanka mounts the top rope, but Davey Boy slams him down with the running powerslam for the three-count.

The Allied Powers' In Your House opponents, tag team champions Owen Hart & Yokozuna, will be in action next week, while Diesel will be interviewed. Jerry reluctantly mentions the name of Jean-Pierre LaFeet, who is still unde-feet-ed and will be in action next week as well. The main event will pit Shawn Michaels versus IRS in one of his last WWF matches before jumping to WCW.
Raw closes out with another scene from the office of Dr. Isaac Yankem. The world's greatest dentist is drilling a patient as Lawler talks about Yankem beating Bret Hart in the ring. King then asks the patient who her favorite superstars are, to which she replies "Big Daddy Cool, Razor Ramon, and Bret Hart." Uh oh! Yankem is incensed by her fandom of the Hitman, so he punishes her with his drill. That's a literal dentist's drill, for the record, readers. Perverts.

Final tally:

6 Maneuvers (Year total: 121)

1 comment:

  1. The Barry Dadinsky segment that's missing is hilarious. Apparently Razor Ramon couldn't be at Raw because he's preparing for the tag team match at IYH. Surely the best way to prepare would be to actually wrestle at Raw?

    And at IYH he will apparently be 'all over Mabel' and if you want Razor Ramon to be all over you (in a different way) buy this t-shirt with his face on it!